I’ve used my fingers and tearfully I pulled every damned hair I could see and get ahold of.
I’ve used tweezers and went mining for possibilities.
Occasionally it seems to be gone. And then at midnight the tickling little cocksucker comes back, and I can’t sleep.
This is like the Edger Allen Poe floor thumping.
It’s driving me to madness. It’s back again now, just in time for bed on a Sunday night.
I may get the garden shears out and just cut my nose off. It may be easier to sleep.
Jeez, get a nose-hair trimmer. You don’t want to rip the bastards out–they’re necessary, for some reason–but a little nostril-gardening is a good thing.
This wins the prize for Most Mundane Post in a Sea of Mundane Posts.
However, I have the solution. First, get ne of those palm-sized magnifying mirrors (10X or so). Find one at Walgreen’s (in the eye makeup area) or Bed, Bath & Beyond. Then a very bright light (like a gooseneck or halogen desk lamp). Sit where you can shine the light directly on your nostrils. THEN the pair of tweezers will do ya some good. I promise you that in the very bright light with the mirror, you will spot the offender and dispatch him (or her, I suppose) posthaste.
I can certainly sympathize. I’ve always known that growing older would have some consequences. So far, I’m completely free of arthritis, I can live with the hernia, having to pee more often isn’t that big a deal, I’m looking forward to the male-pattern baldness finishing its work, and the gray I’m starting to get around the temples is actually kind of distinguished-looking. But nobody ever warned me about the nose hairs. I can usually find and remove the offending strand (though sometimes it takes a needle-nosed pliers), but it just keeps on growing back!
I have a wild hair* in my right nostril. It grows at an angle, so it hits the front of my nostril then starts curling. Eventually, it gets long enough to tickle. And then it starts making me sneeze.
At that point, I go searching for that hair with the tweezers and yank that sucker out. If I take a few extra out while trying to get it, oh well. I don’t think a nose hair trimmer would help either, because it’s pretty much flush to my nostril wall.
*Nose hairs and most body hairs are supposed to grow to a certain length then stop growing. If they don’t I call them a wild hair.
Just glanced at that article (which is all I could manage) and was astounded to see that the woman in question was smiling. How the fuck is that possible? I don’t think I would ever be able to smile again, or utter any words other than “You weren’t there, man. You weren’t there.” while staring into the middle distance.
