When I was a kid, I used to like to sneak that last little bit of beer out of my Dad’s beer can. I was cured of that one day when I belatedly discoverd my Dad had used a nearly empty can for an ashtray.
Many years later, when I was a dog groomer, I was talking to my boss about something when I stopped to take a breath…and sucked into the back of my mouth a clump of dog hair that had been floating around in the air. urk :eek: :smack:
I was on a date. We went to a famous local Italian restaurant (long since closed). The lighting was very low. Atmosphere, I guess.
The salads were brought out and lying on top was what appeared to be a slice of tomato. I popped into my mouth.
Surpise! It was a slice of a hot pepper!!
I couldn’t spit it out without grossing out my date, so I chewed it up and swallowed it. I chugged almost an entire glass of ice water.
My turn, I got two:
About two years ago, woke up in the morning, sitting in front of my computer with a glass of chocolate milk. Didn’t finish it all, left for school. Come back, make more chocolate milk go back to computer. Didn’t even see the first glass still sitting in front of the computer. At some point I took a big swig from the wrong glass. Not curdled or anything, just a big mouthful of warm choc. milk. Luckily I LOVE chocolate milk and that wasn’t enough to turn me off of it. Just startled me. I was grossed out for ohhhh, about three seconds, and spit it back into the glass. I still remember thinking I should be really grossed out, and thinking I shouldn’t want any chocolate milk again for a long time after that. Nope, just spit it out, picked up the right glass and finished it.
Second. I was home alone, and it was time for the dogs to eat lunch, I reach into the dog food, scoop out lunch, they eat, they go out, they go back into the cage. A few hours later I had a pounding headache so I took some Tylenol. A few hours after that it was time for the dogs to have dinner. Reach into the bag, feel around, keep feeling. Nothing to scoop the food with. ::looks around:: ahh, there’s the cup we use for scopping the food with, right next to the water cooler. :smack: (oh and here’s the backround info that I didn’t want to preface this with as it would give it away. We scoop the food with a plastic cup that looks like all the other plastic cups we have, and we keep the food in a bucket on top of the water cooler)
I suppose that’s not quite as bad as what happened to [http://www.nbc10.com/news/3772056/detail.html]these](
[url) people, since it was just one child and he was related.
When I was 5 or 6 and living in Indonesia, my family went to a wedding. My brother and I were favorites of the bride, so she personally gave us each a little hors d’oeuvre. I started to look at it suspiciously, since I couldn’t tell quite what it was, but my father gave me The Look, so I quickly thanked her and put it in my mouth. I could tell immediately that it was liver, but I swallowed it as rapidly as possible and drank some water. It wasn’t until much later that I found out it was dog liver.
This is why I always preview.
OK, when did it become the FIVE second rule? I’ve always subscribed to the THREE second rule since I was a kid. I’m not complaining about the two extra seconds, they are nice to have now that they are sanctioned, but I’m just wondering when it changed. Are floors cleaner now that when I was a kid?
Man, the delights I’ve missed because of two seconds. My life is empty now.
One of my parents favorite stories begins with my mom going out to shop, while my dad was “watching” me and writing his masters theisis. I was two. Apparently, dad was curious as to why his beer was empty when he was sure that he had just opened it (he had lost track of time). Apparently I had not only nearly finished the beer, but I replaced the can or bottle next to the typewriter. Dad found my running in circles and giggling hilarious, mom was less amused, as I am sure you can imagine. To this day I am branded in my family as a lush 
Are you kidding me? I’ve heard it go as high as the ‘ten second’ rule. I suppose it just depends on where you drop it.
Oh man, these are hilarious! hehe
I have 2.
When I was about 7 and my cousins and I were up at our cottage, my aunt decided to make us chocolate milk. She grabbed a jar from the shelf above the fridge, put a heaping spoonful into each glass, poured the milk and stirrred. The 4 of us were happy to get this treat…until we tasted it. It turned out she had made us PEI sand milk. blech My aunt didn’t believe us until she tasted it herself.
This one is actually my grandfather’s story. He had decided to make juice, grabbed a packet from the shelf, poured it in the jug, stirred and poured himself a glass of instant flavoured rice. ewwie.
Lastweek I had a whole plate full of things that wasn’t what I thought! Some of it was good, some of it, was discreetly propelled into my napkin.
I love chinese food, but they really should keep the labels on the buffet updated.
And in an unrelated incident… You can get a mildly sweet cocconut flavor in your coffee by not closing the sugar container well, while your kitchen is being invaded by ants.
I was making myself some mac’n’cheese once, and accidentally used two table spoons of lard instead of butter. However, I realized what I’d done before I mixed it in with the pasta.
Speaking of pasta, when I was in college I was making spaghetti sauce one time and I had recently read that putting a pinch or two of baking soda in the sauce would reduce the acidity. Well, I don’t know why you have to reduce the acidity but it seemed like a good idea. But either my hand slipped or the package slipped, whatever. I ended up dumping way more baking soda in it than I should have. But since I’d never tasted baking soda I assumed it must be flavorless.
Took a big mouthful of sauce - ohmygod that was the most vile taste. That’s got to be one of the worst tastes. I’d rather eat ear wax. I don’t know how people can put that stuff in water and actually drink it.
I have two:
I’ve never told this to anyone because its so embarrassing, but when I was about 4 or 5, I ate a red m&m I’d found on the floor of my grandparent’s bathroom. Instead of melt-in-your-mouth goodness, it was a wayward pill of some kind.
Once while at a relative’s home, I poured myself a bowl of cereal and milk. Unfortunately, the first spoonful revealed to me that I’d just made myself a bowl of cereal and half-and-half.
I was about 5 or 6 when we went to a semi-fancy restaurant with my grandparents. I saw what looked to be a nice-sized scoop of vanilla ice cream sitting in a dish on the table, so I grabbed my spoon and dug in.
It was butter.
My mom (who despises soft drinks) has, on more than one occasion, mistaken my glass of Sprite for her glass of water. Sometimes I order Sprite on purpose. 