It may very well be my inability to look at Ben Affleck in a romancey way–let alone a romancey “man enough to turn a lesbian” way. Jason Lee is the only part of that movie I remember truly enjoying. In fact, I pretty much can’t watch Ben in anything but a Kevin Smith movie, these days.
Well, that and Armageddon. I cry like a little bitch with a skinned knee every damn time, too.
What IS it with people and this movie and their need to trumpet their knowledge of its minutiae?
Jeez.
Get a life, people.
I don’t appreciate your ruse, sir. 
My what?
sob
Draelin! What’s happened to you? I don’t recognize you anymore! It’s like…it’s like you went and got your own identity and opinions and are no longer my doppleganger!
I like Chasing Amy a whole helluva lot. But Dogma’s pretty damn good, too. I think the two are tied in my book o’ Kevin. But *Clerks *will always be fondly remembered and the flat out funniest of all. 'Specially 'cause I was working at a video store when it came out. (The truth is what makes it so, so damn funny.)
Haven’t seen *Clerks 2 *yet.
I like when the Coroner is wheeling the dead guy out. Dante asks if this is the weirdest death she’s ever seen.
No…
Dogma really bored me. But I’m a decided minority in that respect.
(My ranking of the Kevin Smith films I’ve seen: Clerks, Chasing Amy, Mallrats, a fairly large gap, the beginning and end of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Dogma, the middle of Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back.)
Dante: Try not to suck any dicks on your way to the parking lot!
I found clerks to be much funnier in retrospect, I’m afraid. Quite entertaining as a quotable, but not so much when you’re sitting through it.
Your ruse; your cunning attempt to trick me.
Well, I guess I just suck.
But I’m only at 20 or 21, nowhere near 37, I’d say.
I just saw Clerks II and I can recommend it unreservedly. Absolutely hilarious (I peed myself a bit!) and such a seamless, logical extension of the characters in time and situation that there is absolutely no jarring when you first see each one. It’s bizarre that Dante and Randall have obviously changed and aged, but for some odd reason Jay and Silent Bob appear not to have altered in the slightest in spite of what, 12 years elapsed time? It works, though, since they’re more mythical archetypes than actual people, really…
I loved the way the story line so neatly wraps itself back into the Clerks canon, with a resolution that’s both inevitable and incredibly satisfying.
And the Elias character? Screamingly funny–not an easy job to be a newcomer into a bunch of well known and loved characters but he manages to carve a niche for himself that’s unique and fits right in with the rest.
Then there’s the Buffalo Bill reference and the ponytailed dance number–don’t get me started!
See it, see it, see it–even if you DID like Jersey Girl!
I was merely pointing out that you weren’t paying any attention to me.
[slight hijack]
Highly recommended: A couple of Flash animations that poke gentle fun at both Clerks and Star Wars: Trooper Wars, Parts 1 and 2. It starts with a couple of bored slacker Stormtroopers at the Death Stop and involves a couple of Sith Lords named Darth Jay and Darth Bob. Not gut-busting, but a nice tribute to both SW and Kevin Smith. It purports to be the true story of how the rebels got their hands on the Death Star plans. It obviously was inspired by Dante and Randall’s debate over the better movie: The Empire Strikes Back or Return of the Jedi.
Trooper Dante: (on phone with irate customer) Dantooine? You took your drink all the way to Dantooine before you drank it? That’s 45 parsecs away from here. Of course it was watered down. Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever. Come on back if you want to. Bye. Your ice cream melted?!! Unbelieveable. Why do I have to deal with all the idiots in the Universe?
Trooper Clerks Official Website
[/hijack]
And I hope it feels good!
You know, I may be whooshing here, but this lost you a lot of film cred 
No, I’m serious. But I never watch it of my own free will. If it’s on TV and anywhere near the scene where Bruce Willis shoves Ben into the elevator thingy and sacrifices himself, though, I’m trapped, and then I’m useless for several hours while I try to pull myself together.
Yeah, after seeing Jay & Silent Bob, Clerks, and Mallrats (in about that order), I was really disappointed by Chasing Amy. It was a sweetly pathetic movie. It was like you took Dante’s hangup over all the BJs his girlfriend had given and turned it into a whole movie.
Comedy Central ran this uncut on Saturday night when I watched it for the first time. I now plan to watch the others mentioned in this thread.
Favorite line: At least he wasn’t 36.
Chasing Amy is a great movie; probably my favorite by Kevin Smith. The only problem is the pacing. The climax of the movie is the scene in the pickup truck when Holden is pouring out his heart to Alyssa, knowing that’s it’s hopeless, still hoping anyway, and having to say it all one way or the other. The stuff after that, Holden’s self-consciousness over his inexperience and his proposed solution to it, is a letdown.
If you can’t identify with that scene in the truck, you’ve either been very lucky or very unlucky.
There’s also some additional Clerks material that’s only been in comic books, including exactly what happened at Julie Dwyer’s funeral.
That’s really the only scene that had any impact on me whatsoever.
Well, I thought the Santa/Easter Bunny/Friendly Lesbian/Man-Hating Dyke thing was funny, so that had some impact.
::channeling Olaf::
“My love for you is like a truck, Berserker
Would you like some making fuck, Berserker”