I know I'm getting old

Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
1

Because I just got this catalog in the mail
www.timeformecatalog.com

Most certainly Cougar Central

It seems to consist mostly of
Unabashed “Mom” jeans with lots of elastic

Undergarments with lots of elastic, including Spanx…hi pbbth

Overengineered and way too serious sex toys

Products to make your face look younger
Products to make your eyes look younger
Products to make your mouth look younger
Products to make your neck look younger
Products to make your arms look younger
Products to make your boobs look younger
Products to make your tummy look younger
Products to make your thighs look younger
Products to make your legs look younger
Products to make your ass look younger
Products to make your feet look younger

and my three favorites

Sexy Incontinence Panties
http://www.timeformecatalog.com/cgi-bin/timeforme/postkey_find.html?keywords=95203&mode=

and this device, sort of like a thighmaster for the vagina
http://www.timeformecatalog.com/cgi-bin/timeforme/postkey_find.html?cm_re=celebros-_-center-_-search%20promo&keywords=22088&cm_mmc=&items=0&subtotal=0.00

and for those who have mastered the “TwatMaster” and want to add freeweights

http://www.timeformecatalog.com/cgi-bin/timeforme/postkey_find.html?cm_re=celebros-_-center-_-search%20promo&keywords=90787&cm_mmc=&items=0&subtotal=0.00

My head just exploded

2

I am of an age where I can imagine that something like this might show up in my mailbox. Yikes!

I understand my anatomy pretty well, but I can’t figure out that free weight thing. All I can think of is my sister’s description of a “peso show” in Olongapo City in the Philippines.

3

OMG! Were you too horrified to speak or think for a minute or two? Those panties! THOSE PANTIES!

4

And you can pay $42/each to pee in them!

I got this catalogue this summer. It took me days to get over the shock of it. I know I have to get old, but do I have to suffer through this crap while I do it?
I don’t even want to imagine free weights on a Twatmaster. I may die a revirginated person on that alone…

5

Please, somebody explain The Cone to me.

On second thought, maybe I don’t want to understand.

6

It gave a whole new meaning to " OOHHH Baby, you’re making me wet"

7

NM

8

I haven’t logged on for awhile and I usually don’t at work but those panties! I forwarded the link to a friend and added, “Aren’t you glad to know they’re there if you need them”.

Thanks for the laugh.

9

I wonder if that lip hair remover hurts much.

10

And you can use them 200 TIMES. It says so in the description. Think about that. 200 times. :eek:

11

I know a few wimmin who have dealt with stress incontinence for a long time. They’d be happy to know about the pee-panties.

12

Here, take along your own butt cheeks wherever you go!

13

I’m warning you, don’t waste your time or money on the Spanx. Learn from my mistakes.:wink: