I LOST The Precioussssss!

After The Fellowship of The Ring came out, I posted here about the merchandising of LOTR Jewelry, and one of you pointed me here: http://www.badalijewelry.com/theonering-s.htm

Being a frugal sort of chap, I sprung for the one in sterling silver and ordered it to fit my left index finger. I received many compliments and remarks, and even sent some people to the fine establishment that sold me my ring.

Everything was going great until I started losing serious weight on Atkins, and I felt the ring begin to slip on easier, but instead of being worried that I might lose it, I became vain and proud.

Last week I had to “glove-up” at my hospital job because we got in an OD whom we would have to “charcoal”. (I won’t bore you with the details, but suffice it to say when the liquid charcoal goes down the bad stuff comes up, and not always slowly. ;))

Anyway, you’ve probably guessed it already, haven’t you? Right. When I pulled the gloves off, off also came the “precious” without its owner realizing it, and went into a “HazMat” bag. When I realized what had happened, it was already too late. Those bags get taken out very quickly, where they are joined with others just like them, and off they go to be incinerated.

So, after a fashion, I suppose my ring is going to its own Mount Doom. Unless, that is, it makes some other “stops” along the way.

Gollum! The irony of it all! :smack:
I mean…"Golly! The irony of it all!"


Looking forward to your wit added to this true tale! :wink:

One Ring to find the drug
One Ring to bind it
One Ring to bring it up
And in the bucket slime it.

Now don’t go shrivel up on us or anything.

Don’t worry, the incinerator won’t harm it, although people will temporarily be able to read the inscription. It will go out from the ashes somehow, picked up by a gull, perhaps, and then dropped in a stream, where a trout will carry it, and eventually two young brothers will find it while fishing, and, well, you know the rest.

And here I always thought we were downstream from the events in TLOTR…

A similar thing happened to me a few years ago. I lost a lot of weight and the ring my Grandad had bought me fell off without me realising. My Grandad had sadly died since he bought it. I was never able to find the ring. :frowning:

My SO and I have been looking for a ring for him. He got me a beautiful ring about a year ago from an antique shop and we were hoping to find something similar for him. This doesn’t match mine, but I like the idea of him wearing a ring as a symbol of our relationship that has the phrase “and in the darkness bind them,” on it.

Bummer, Quasi. Good for you on the weight loss though.

I wear my father’s, and my grandfather’s, wedding rings on my left hand little finger. (It’s been broken several times and has an enlarged knuckle) One day, after parking my car in the garage, I went in the house to change clothes and cook dinner. I take off my watch and rings when I cook, so I took off the watch and then realized the rings weren’t on my finger. I was totally stressed and stormed through the house like a madman trying to remember where/when I took them off. They were nowhere in the house to be found.

I had backed the car in and that takes a bit of manuvering to get it close to the wall. I also have a leather steering wheel cover that is laced. Somehow, while turning the wheel with my left hand, the rings came off. I found them on the floor under the drivers seat. Stress relieved.

You’re lucky. When I lost my ring, I also lost a finger.

Next time, I swear, I’m gonna put all my power into something less personal. Like a Buick.

My initial theory about how you lost it had nothing to do w/Atkins.

I assumed it slipped off after you rubbed some lotion on your skin after fear of getting the hose again.

I recommend you tie a chicken bone to a piece of string and pull it around with you whilst whistling and calling “Come here, Precious”

It might turn up.

Yea, but watch out. I hear those things are always being 'jacked by hobbits. Buicks, that is, not rings. But now that I think about it …

How about a Lawn Gnome? Sauron’s Lawn Gnome of Power. The War of the Gnome. The Fellowship of the Gnome. I like it.

Don’t worry, Quasi, sometimes the ring has to go interfere in the affairs of hobbits, but I’m sure it’ll be back soon. “Soon” being Tolkien Time, of course, so it may be a couple hundred years.

See? Losing my LOTR soundtrack CD wasn’t so bad as this mess of yours. I found my CD, it never left my house… that was your first mistake. Well, you wanted people to admire it and they did BUT wearing it to work?? Are you nuts??? It’s gonna be given to the flames, you say? Oh dear…
There aren’t any Saurons in this world, you know.

Honestly, I feel bad for ya. I ordered a version of the one Ring, too. It was gold, with the script, mounted on a glowing piece of Mount Doom, and I was so happy to have one until I got it. It was cheap looking and gawdy. It was shiny and all but the gold coating (coating… GRRRRRR) was messed up and so I sent it back from whence it came, oh yes, I did! I got a refund minus shipping (paid for shipping on that ugly lil’ thing twice! GRRRRR).
If you got compliments on yours, then you were lucky and now, you Preciousssss is gone sigh.

I’m really sorry to hear it slipped off by accident but… the losing weight thing sounds amazing. Could you perhaps email me with the info on Atkins, pretty please? If it’s not too much trouble, that is.


Yea, Sauron’s right here. He’s got a wife that tries to spend his money.

Hey! Hey! Hey! I heard that! :wink:

I do think your comment about the clothes I bought and at that price they should have come with a hooker in them was one of the funniest things I’ve read in a while.

So who’s a fat hobbit now, huh? Not Quasi!

You know, in LOTR everyone that “lost” the Ring wound up dead. Count the lucky hairs on your feet that your ring did not carry this heavy penalty. But don’t despair! Most likely one of the basement trolls rifled through the hazmat bags before they hit the incinerator and claimed your preciousssss for it’s nassssty sssself. It sounds as if your Third Age has just begun.

pulls up theater chair and barrel o’ popcorn

::collapses in fit of tremendous mirth::

“Those who will not learn from history are doomed to repeat it.”


I think goblins are more likely to be in the basement. I hope you cursed the nasty little hazmat bagses.