TL/DR: Evil always triumphs. Crime pays. Fuck everyone you can; it don’t cost nothin.
If you’re a juror and someone claims insanity for murdering someone that hurt their family - acquit them before lunch and head for IHOP.
Earlier as I looked out my front window, I see my two idiot dogsromping in the street.
They’ve somehow escaped the fenced yard and made it to the Danger Zone.
They’re never allowed out front for obvious reasons. They will never obey commands to return, just run hell-for-leather with their occasional freedom. Forget the acre in back they command…
Just as I rose to go chase them, some cocksucking whore ran this oneover with her SUV.
She slowed before she got to him, stopped after hitting him, then took off as I made it to the front yard screaming at her to stop. There is no question that she knew what happened, and I’m not sure she didn’t do it on purpose. I’ve met evil in my day, but what the fuck kind of worthless cunt runs down a fucking dog and drives on?
It took me 20 seconds to get to car keys and phone, jump in my truck, and give chase.
20 seconds later, I see a dark SUV pulling into a house down the street and the driver jump out. I skid to a stop at her driveway and yell “was that you? did you run down my dogs?” Large Angry Negro in the yard starts towards me yelling that she didn’t do anything, blah, blah, blah. I punched the gas, and kept going down a side street until I got to a man at his mailbox who confirmed that no one had passed him in the last 3 minutes.
Since we live on a dead-end street, unless someone has a hedge that opens into a Batcave, this is the vehicle that did it.
I raced home to call the cops, and to review the security tape from the front yard camera and my dashcam, always pointed at the road. Large Angry Negro is now in his truck coming across the road at me on my street. I pass him and get home.
As I make it into the house, he’s in my driveway, screaming threats at me. Whatever.
Should he open the door, he will have made his last bad decision. I’m on the phone with the cops at this point.
What follows is typical of my life, and why I should end it soon in some dramatic fashion involving skydiving or the Empire State Building.
Lil Ducati has pulled the tape to watch some fucking movie we only have on VHS, and she couldn’t find the remote for HER VCR, so she utilized the dedicated security TV/VCR. It would have shown everything 40 feet away.
My dashcam: records in 15 minute clips, re-starts. 32GB covers the last 10-12 hours. Ahh. Here come the cops. Explanation, blah, blah, blah, let’s go to the tape.
Previous clip ends at say, 1:15:47, and the last clip begins at 1:16:11. Previous clip shows dogs getting into road and ends. Last clip begins with my fat ass running up the drive and going for keys and such. Yep. The only camera that would have shown the SUV clearly drive by has been dead/resetting for about 20 seconds, just as she drove by and over the dog.
Now I can’t prove anything. I didn’t see the driver, couldn’t get a tag, and of course they were out of sight for the 20 seconds it took me to find keys and get going.
The cops head down to chat with LAN and White Trash Driver, and come back with good news: They claim I threatened to kill them all for what she did. “Gonna blow your nigger head off” were my exact words, and with that, they demanded my arrest.
Now believe it or not, that pleased me to no end, for what LAN and WTD didn’t reckon on was the dashcam - with audio- was still running. Grinning, I invited the cops in for a little game of he said/he said. While they were down the street, I had cued up on a laptop the clips in question. I played the clip where I slid to a stop, asked my question, and then drove on.
No threats. No name-calling. No nothing.
Then we play the part where LAN is standing in my drive yelling death threats.
I told the cops as long as he keeps his dumb ass at home and out of my yard I won’t press charges. I’m feeling magnanimous for some reason.
The cops looked at each other, told me to call them next time instead of chasing someone, and to have a good day. They then went to give LAN and WTD the news that they could be charged with giving a false statement to the cops and terroristic threats. Don’t know what happened down there.
Now then. My question is this: While I have a couple of cameras in the house, I want more, closer, HD, out on the road. I don’t think LAN is stupid enough to come fuck with me, but just on general principle, should anything happen to my dogs, kids, cars, etc. I want awesome video. I caught some kids trying to steal a scooter out of my driveway at night last year. If I hadn’t actually seen it happening, it would have been a mystery.
What brand, setup, specs, etc do I want? Every internet security site has plenty of kits, advice, and setups, but I want to know what **really **works. I’m thinking of maybe a birdhouse or something to conceal a camera right by the street, and maybe one in the mailbox looking the other way. Yeah, I’m sounding crazy, but right now I’m mad as fuck at the lapse, and that’s just for the dog. What goes on when we’re gone?
We take trips all the time. What about those damn squatters!
I’d rather not run 1800’ of cable all over the yard, but I can’t think of how to power wireless cameras without a dedicated battery that has to be changed or charged…
Recommend me a great system/ set of specs to reach so my security tapes don’t look like every grainy convenience store robbery tape that could be you or me or Bert and Ernie robbing the place. I don’t want domes or big cameras that look like cameras, otherwise they’re targets for vandals or someone who actually wants to break in/get to the back yard where the toys are. I want small and sneaky so I can hear “FUUUUCK” all the way from the jail when some idiot learns some bluebird nest taped his dumb ass stealing my shit.
BTW, dog is fine; got rolled under the middle, not squished by tire, otherwise I’d be typing from jail.
Oh I forgot, if you identify a black person as anything other than “African American” you’re a horrible evil racist. Got it.
