I’m making a cd for a Christmas party. I’m looking for both bad lyrics and/or bad singing.
So far, I have
This horrible rendition of “O Holy Night” (if you haven’t already heard it, you must!) http://www.ourmedia.org/node/123369
Christmas Shoes
Backdoor Santa
Suzy Snowflake
The freakin’ dogs.
Grandma Got Run Over by a Reindeer.
I Yust Go Nuts at Christmas by Yogi Yorgesson (It’s my mom’s favorite Christmas song :smack: )
Daddy, Please Don’t Get Drunk This Christmas by John Denver (I think Alan Jackson also did this one)
How about “I Want a Hippopatamus for Christmas” as sung by that irritating little girl? For that matter, the Chipmunk song too.
Oh, and Feliz Navidad. See, it’s already in your head.
Twisted Sister just released an album of standard Christmas songs that sound remarkably like most other Twisted Sister songs. “Oh Come All Ye Faithful” sounds like they just redid the lyrics to “We’re Not Gonna Take It”. It’s awful.
You mean the stop-motion animation in black-and-white Suzy Snowflake? It’s overly cute, perhaps, and not prime quality, but I wouldn’t call it bad. I saw it every year as a kid, so it’s nostalgic for me.
In any case, then Hardrock, Coco, and Joe and the version of “Frosty the Snowman” on the same page probably qualify by your standard.
But isn’t the South Park “O Holy Night” THE standard? It is for me.
If it’s just dementia you want, I have a version of a woman comic doing “12 Days of Christmas” as a drunk.
I didn’t know there was an animated Suzy Snowflake. I remember the song from a Christmas album my parents had. It’s the high pitch, and the "wooo wooo"s that bug me.
Sympathy for the Santa?
The novelty song “The 12 pains of Christmas” has some people who, while not actually singing, have really annoying voices.
Well, it’d be the other way around, then, wouldn’t it? They filked Oh Come, All Ye Faithful" for “We’re Not Gonna Take It,” and since it’s in the public domain, they couldn’t get sued. Brilliant!
There are some who would think of the Alvin and the Chipmunks Christmas Album as especially cringeworthy.
HANGOVERS!
Heh. There’s a telethon locally for one of the community service orgs and people pledge money to have this played. Then others pledge money to MAKE IT STOP!
The Chistmas Jug Band doing “Santa lost a 'Ho” is a personal favorite.
Last year I heard a bizarre tune…it was a parody of Iron Man with Christmas lyrics. Don’t remember what it was called or who did it…
Welp, they replace “I am iron-man” with “I am santa-claus” so it’s either called “I Am Santa Claus” or “Santa Claus”…which would be hard to find. I have it on a tape, no idea of the real name.
A good suggestion.
“Santa Baby” by Everclear
“Walkin’ 'Round in Women’s Underwear,” no idea who recorded it
Wow! I mean WOW! Fifteen seconds into it, you think, “Oh, I get it. I see how bad this is.” And then it tops itself. And then it tops itself again. Again and again, it finds brand-new ways to suck.
That song just disproved everything Christmas is supposed to stand for. Ick.
In the spirit of the thread: In Athens, Georgia, the alternative weekly used to have local bands donate songs for an annual Christmas album, from which the proceeds would go to local charities. Some bands would do straight-up Christmas songs, and some would have fun with it. A band called Daddy Upright did a song one year, with my favorite title ever:
“I Guess I Won’t Be Fucking You This Christmas”
I’ve never heard of some of these, which up until now was a good thing. 
“Look who’s coming 'round the bend,
It’s Santa and his reindeer friends,
With a ho-ho-ho and a hey-hey-hey,
It’s Santa’s Super Sleigh!”
– from About a Boy (too bad it’s not on the soundtrack album)
“Last Christmas” by Wham!. (Okay, so tastes vary. I think the lyrics are pretty bad.)