This thread fills my Ron void.
Photographic evidence is required before rendering a verdict on Douchebag’s opinion…
I can guarantee that I do not know, nor will I ever know (nor do I want to know) if any of my co-workers are going commando.
This alone is just plain weird.
If you would’ve had to keep him employed for some reason and was able to share more stories this guy might, MIGHT, rival Shredder Guy for entertainment value.
You
Can’t
Make
This
Stuff
Up
!
Ok, here’s another one.
So, because of all the turmoil/lack of money/lack of planning, they’ve moved 5 times in the past 4 months. Moving entails putting things in trucks and tying them down.
He does not seem to grasp this principle that my 9 year old has mastered, or at least not yet.
We had bought a new bed, and she asked is she could have the old one. I said sure. He stopped by and tied it on the top of her SUV and drove away. They got about 4 miles away, before it flipped off and the mattress landed in one lane and the boxspring landed in the other lane of a two lane highway blocking all traffic. Ooops.
As she’s relaying this story to me, one of our other guys was in here, and said “He did it again?”
I guess they had picked up a couch, drove it home in the back of a truck. Now, if any of you have moved things before, you understand that in most circumstances a couch in the bed of a truck is only tied down for “just in case.” Well, even his ‘just in case’ wasn’t good enough.
The couch ended up flying off in the middle of the highway, and they kept on driving. I said “You kept on driving? Why? Why wouldn’t you pick it up?” The reason it wasn’t picked up was 'It exploded into little tiny pieces on impact. We just pulled off at the next exit, parked there for a while, and seeing there were no cops, we left."
Hopefully he doesn’t get a job as a mover.
Every now and then, I feel bad for myself because I haven’t had a long-term relationship for more than around four months. The ones I did have ended amicably, but I remain single, and I no longer expect to marry or have a family.
Then I read something like this thread, and consider myself blessed. 
I’d not only like to keep my bookmark on this continuing saga, but would also like the spin off stories of the characters who perpetrated the other shenanigans you mentioned. Please?
I wanna work where you work!
Is that what you kids are calling it these days?
“Ron” was not only a classic thread here, but became the default noun for a full-of-oneself Good Ol’ Boy.
The Driveway Defiler does seem like quite the Ron.
This is what the ex looks like. Really. Yes, everyone comments on the similarity.
http://www.blogcdn.com/www.aoltv.com/media/2010/08/bret-michaels-ap.jpg
This is much closer to what she looks like, and her level of prettiness.
(It’s really weird trying to find lookalikes, but surprisingly easy.*)
- Pro-tip- do not Google “brunette amateur”**
**I was looking for a ‘b’ model type, and thought that would help. It didn’t.
Unless, of course, you like brunette amateurs.
While I hate to disagree with such a nice person as you…this is MUCH more fun than SG stories.
fisha, I’ve only once had to watch such an epic meltdown as this. Yours is much more entertaining.
I can honestly picture the image of you getting told that she’s commando. She’s shifting her hips in a way that shows that her jeans are too tight, then suddenly gets happy and calls her new wonderful husband and shimmies around then runs into the restroom.
After you call her on her half hour break, she gave you an innocent look and said that her jeans rubbed because she didn’t have any underware. Your face showed outrage so she explained it was because her ex hubby put her panties through their home shredder…so then you went into shock while thinking about sharing about being commando, about leaving all of her panties at her ex’s place, and then about the damage to the shredder.
Please keep the updates regular. You know the rule, once you start feeding the wildlife you can’t stop because you’ve made them dependent on you.
Ah. THAT’s how he shreds those undies…
No. no no no.
I notice true work hell always comes back to shredding…
I thought “fighting over the chicken coop” was a metaphor for a fight over the house… :eek:
The Fisherman, 2007
Get a call from a homeowner (porn producer/distributor) one Saturday afternoon wondering why our sider is fishing in his private pond instead of siding his house.
I have no good answer and tell him as much.
Long story, he and sider had bonded over porn, they had fished together in the pond several times after work, and the sider took liberties fishing that day without asking.
Nice upper middle class home, family neighborhood.
Weirdest thing was, the sider and the homeowner had become good friends, and the homeowner called us several times after that, wondering why the sider wouldn’t answer his phone calls, asked the office if they’d pass on messages to him, asked if the sider would forgive him for 'telling on him," saying regretfully “If only he would have asked first, I didn’t mean for him to get into trouble.”
It was bizarre, and the homeowner called for at least a month or so looking for him.
Yes, the sider was fired. For fishing on the job.
To be fair, making your sider work weekends is a shit deal when the fishing is good.