There are two types of searches: the where was the last time you saw them? search and the Easter egg hunt. Ply your friends with pizza and beer and have an Easter egg hunt. I did this once and my buddy found my keys closed up inside a book on a shelf.
Beware: Easter egg hunts will also find any misplaced undies, drugs, sex toys etc. could be good or bad depending on circumstance.
Do you have forced hot water radiators? The baseboard kind with fins? Because I once found my mother’s keys after MONTHS – they’d managed to fall through the narrow air opening and were sitting on top of the radiator fins, utterly out of sight.
The easter egg hunt sounds like fun. To encourage them, maybe buy a few extra key chains with some junk keys (doesn’t every house have unknown keys in their junk drawer?) and deliberately hide those in out of the way places. Mini-rewards for finding the planted keys, something better for being the one to find the real keys.
Journal entry: day 3: another keyless day.
PS: I love you people.
Am I the only one subscribed to this thread?
This works for me too.
“Say, my wife’s out of town and I need your female perspective to help me find my keys.”
Needs work.
Have you looked on your keychain?
Mysteriously missing as well.
Hey kids!
Key free, way to be!
I’m feeling very positive about my lifestyle choice!
“I think they’re in my pants pocket.”
Elves once snuck my keys out of my pants pocket and stuck them into the closed bottom drawer of my dresser bureau.
Of course Skeptics are wont to point out that the bottom drawer of said bureau had been open all week until I had close it with my foot the night before when I had taken my wallet out of the same pocket of my pants the keys had been in to check if I had enough money for breakfast the next morning.
But I know it was Elves because they knew I would never bend down and look. It was a good thing that I need to wear socks the next days and finally openned it. I wear socks on average only once a week, when I go out to eat breakfast ay MickeyD’s.:o
Have you tried down the cutout for computer cords on your desk ?
I popped into my insurance agency today and when I got up to leave, couldn’t find my keys. After ten minutes of looking, I spotted them at the bottom of the hole. My agent removed her bottom drawer and fished them out.
Worth a try.
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHH YYYYYYYYYYYYYEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSSSS!!
I found 'em! Holy shit, I found them!
This was just about three minutes ago, so you’ll have to pardon me if I’m still giddy.
I found them in a terra cotta “hose keeper” outside.
Now, of course, I realize exactly what happened. The other day, my wife was using one of our outside faucets, which has always been a little dicey. Well, this time, the faucet popped off, and water started blasting everywhere. She yelled, and I came running.
I’m sure I had a nanosecond’s thought to where I was chucking my keys as I was wading into the jet of water, but I had other things on my mind.
Here’s the kicker, though. I had thought about this incident before, and I thought I had rather thoroughly checked the entire area…including the hose keeper. In fact, I KNOW I checked it more than once, at least once with a flashlight.
Hmmmm…inky bloaters indeed.
That was totally going to be my next guess.
Glad you found them!
Hooray!! Now there’s a relief!
Have a celebration beer on all of us!
You found them before your wife got home? Yay you! Now all you have to do is get a mod to delete this thread. 
Hooray! I am excited for you and your mad key-finding skillz. 