Petty Rant About Missing Car keys

Either I have jeans that get up and walk around on their own, or I am the most absent-minded fool on the face of the earth. See, things were finally looking up - I got a job, my car payment was going to be early instead of late, and the weather was finally getting nice enough to wear shorts. Then, the most awful thing ever happened. (Well, maybe not the most awful thing ever, but it’s pretty bad - in my little world, anyway.)

I changed my pants when I got home from work and set them on the floor of my relatively-clean bedroom. I went to bed and woke up the next morning - my day off. I remember seeing my jeans on the floor when I got up to take a shower, but when I returned they weren’t there. “No big deal,” I thought, forgetting that both my keys (car, house, etc.) and wallet were in there. I live with my aunt, and I figured she just took them downstairs when she was going to do laundry.

I had to go to work the next day (Saturday) and after getting ready a half-hour early, I instinctively reached into my pocket to get my keys. Much to my surprise, they were missing. No worries yet - I’ll just go find the jeans I had on yesterday. Checked the laundry room: no keys. Checked the dryer: no keys. Checked the hallway outside the laundry room: no keys. Look around the entire fucking house, including the front and back yards:** NO FUCKING KEYS. ** My aunt - the only other person who lives here - swears up and down that she hasn’t seen my black jeans that I have to wear for work. I obviously haven’t seen them, so where in the holy blue fuck are my goddamn car keys and wallet?!?

I can’t rely on other people to get me to work, and public transportation costs money - which I conveniently left in my wallet in my damn jeans. I’ve looked everywhere, and I haven’t found a trace of anything even remotely key-like. I learned a few valuable lessons, though.

LESSON #1: Take stuff out of your pockets and put them in a safe place before you go to bed.

LESSON #2: Always leave a few dollars in a safe place, just in case you lose your wallet.

LESSON #3: Make copies of your car keys.

Yeah, I know. I should have known all that already. And yes, I know they have to be somewhere, and I’ll find them if I keep looking. And yes, I also know that pants don’t just get up and walk away on their own. This is very frustrating, as I told a friend of mine (whom I haven’t seen in what seems like forever) I would pick her up on Thursday from a town three hours away. How will I do that with no car keys?? I’m blowing this totally out of proportion, I know, but I needed to vent. FUCK!! I’ve often misplaced my keys and found them a few minutes later, but a few days?? This sucks.

<<deep breath>> OK, I’m done now. Carry on.


You can usually have car keys duplicated inexpensively by a dealership that handles your car model. The paperwork for the car (if complete) should have key code listed and they will use this number code to cut a new key. Possibly a VIN number could also work for this info. but I’m not sure about that

The probability is your memory is playing tricks on you and you did not see them on the floor and you have actually left your jeans behind or under something in plain sight but they are just out of sight enough that you wouldn’t think that they are there.

D.E., cariad, check under the couch. I’m serious. I’ve found clothes under mine before.

If not, ask your (now former?) roommate to check her clothing-area. And check anywhere you might have dropped something. I once found my meal card under my course calender and a copy of Li-Young Lee’s Rose.

Good luck, though…and from what you told me of your friend, she would totally understand.

You know that part in your first paragraph where you mention the weather finally being nice enough to wear shorts for a change? It gave me the cutest mental image of a slick, moist, happy little earthworm with a few grains of dirt clinging to his face and body dancing around a sidewalk, wearing shorts, slippers, and a little visor. :smiley:

A note on the “safe place” to put your wallet, keys, etc.-- designate a place in your house or room where this stuff will go. I myself have a rectangular wire mesh tray that I plan to use for this exact purpose once I move out next month. Anyway, make it a habit to put your keys and stuff there every time you come home (before you toss your pants on the floor). Force yourself to not put anything else but those frequently misplaced items in there.

And I second your idea of keeping an emergency stash and a spare car key somewhere. Just make sure you don’t forget where it is. :slight_smile:

Well I finally gave in and went to the Chevy dealership (yes, I know - don’t flame me for woning a Chevy. It wasn’t my first choice, I swear!) and had tem make another key. So for now, all I’m missing is my wallet and the important documentation that is in there. I’m sure it will turn up, and at least I can drive again. Thanks for the ideas, everyone!


Um, that should say owning a Chevy.

I hate it when I lose my stuff. Especially when it’s due to the (unwitting and good intentioned) actions of others.

While I wouldn’t undo any part of my life right now, I can safely say this: Living alone, your stuff may not be where it’s supposed to be, but at least it’s where you left it.

Hope your wallet etc. comes back to you OK.