I was in downtown Champaign (near school) one time, and I was approached by some guy who was saying how his father was dying in St. Louis and he needed money to take the Amtrak out there. He was sobbing and everything. I just told him that I had no cash (untrue), and went about my business. An hour later, when I took the bus back to campus, I saw him sitting only a few seats away from me, laughing it up with another guy. I’m glad I trusted my first instinct on that one.
Arrgggh! Dammit, I was just about to reply with basically the same thing. Although mine was going to be:
“I’m blind – what did you say?” 
“I was gonna make espresso!” 
I almost wish I hadn’t clicked on this topic, I haven’t thought about this in a long while:
Perhaps the most pissed-off I’ve been in my whole life was a situation like this. I was about to see Rent with my girlfriend, and a guy came up to me with a story about being homeless and a veteran and what have you, and asked me for change. I had a little, but I didn’t give him any. I wasn’t rude about it, I just told him I didn’t have change. That wasn’t good enough for him, so he said something about how I could spend a thousand dollars on my clothes (I was just wearing Gap khakis and a sweater, and my parents got them for me anyway) and hundred dollars to see a play (the only reason I could afford the show was a big discount). And he said something about “she’s gonna leave your ass.” I wish I’d been composed enough to yell “you’re sure as fuck not getting my change now,” but I was too mad. I had a lot of trouble getting into the play. I’m a generous guy, so that was bad enough, but to be judged like that based on my clothes and cheap theatre tickets? Wow.
Coming from a small town, I’m not used to seeing homeless people or beggars on street corners but since moving to Oregon and going into Salem to have dinner or watch a movie, I’ve noticed a couple here and there that have definite territories. One in particular is always at the Safeway near Center Street and when I was going into town two to three times a week for about two months, I think I saw him there every time.
One of the last times I remember passing him, he had a cardboard sign that said “No more lies, I need a beer!” and while it amused me that he was at least being honest, I shook my head when I saw him wading into traffic (it’s at a stoplight) to get money from people that were giving him money for it when I never saw anyone giving him money before when he had any other number of signs up. If even *half *of them were true, he needs more than just a spare dollar to get his life back.
Underwear goes inside the pants
We’re in one of the richest countries in the world,
And the minimum wage is lower now than it was thirty five years ago.
There are homeless people everywhere.
This homeless guy asked me for some money the other day.
And I was gonna give it to him but then I thought you’re just gonna use it on drugs or alcohol.
And then I thought, that’s what I’m gonna use it on.
Why am I judging this poor bastard.
People love to judge homeless guys. Like, your giving him money
He’s just gonna waste it.
He’s just gonna waste the money
Well, he lives in a box, what do you want him to do? Save up and buy a wall unit?
Take a little run to the store for a throw rug and a CD rack? He’s homeless.
I walked behind this guy the other day.
A homeless guy asked him for money.
He looked right at the homeless guy and goes why don’t you go and get a job you bum.
People always say that to homeless guys, get a job like it’s that easy.
This guy was wearing his underwear outside his pants.
Outside his pants. I’m guessing his resume isn’t all up to date.
I’m predicting some problems during the interview process.
I’m pretty sure even McDonalds has a “underwear goes inside the pants” policy.
Not that they enforce it very strictly, but technically I’m sure it’s on the books.
Yeah there are the types who are just looking to con someone but I think these lyrics are worth considering.
Chris Rock: “If a homeless person has a funny sign, he hasn’t been homeless that long. A real homeless person is too hungry to be funny.”
These guys have been around for ages, at least 30 years. I remember being approached by them in downtown Baltimore with my parents when I was a kid. I thought the card with the symbols was cool, but my parents didn’t give them any money.
He’s quadraplegic? And he sells pens that he makes? What, with his teeth?
Actually I don’t think he makes them. (Even an able-bodied person needs special molds, dyes, etc. to make a pen). My point is, he was offering something in return, not just saying, "give me money." Look, I can either spend $5 or $10 on crappy Gloria Jeans instant takeaway overpriced coffee, or on some useful pens from a poor disabled guy who is a nice person, ya know? 
I had the good fortune of having been solicited by one of these pamphlet people at a McDonald’s. The good fortune for me was that I just got done with an ASL class and replied to the pamphlet with a simple “Hi, how are you doing?” The panic on the person’s face was priceless as he quickly snatched the pamphlet and left McDonald’s.
Ah yes, the “I’m deaf, give me money” scam. I’ve seen it before when I was walking out from Walmart.
You are evil and to be cherished.
Damn you anyway…