I suck and I blow; also, Communist Little Girls and Their Communisty Lemonade Stand! [Fixed title]

[Homer Simpson]Mmmmmm! Lemon-flavored precious bodily fluids![/Homer Simpson]

He was such a nice boy on The Wonder Years. What the hell turned him into such a jerk off?

I can’t spell for shirt, either.

Reading this thread I wondered three things:

  1. The girls made coumadinisty lemonade? That could be dangerous.
  2. I thought Telly Savalas is dead, why is he writing a column?
  3. Why does Telly Savalas think that the point of having a lemonade stand is to make money, as opposed to serving lemonade? Dead people just never seem to make sense.

What the fuck?! They don’t teach Ayn Rand in the elementary schools anymore?

A real conservative would have exercised Second-Amendment rights to punctuate her First-Amendment rant. It’s the only way to fight creeping Socialism.

I’d like to see a talk show where Dan, Terry, Michael, Adam, Fred (or Ben, but not both), Randy, and Doc Savage all get together to discuss current events.

What a jerk. An alleged grownup, stopping to intervene in a game that little kids she has no earthly connection to are playing, to tell them that ‘you have to play your game MY way.’

That’s all it is. No more, and no less.

Fixed title.

Original title: “!”

Geez I cannot even spell my replacement title right in my request to the Admin.

It’s official… I suck and I blow.

For free?

This is my favorite line:

Not just “rolled down the window”

She had to make the point that she has them real fancy push button windows.

I have an image in my mind of a painted old biddy in an air conditioned limo saying “Jeeves, do stop so I can inform these heathen children about the ways of capitalism.”

I’m not sure which is worse. Terry’s assumption, with no underlying basis behind it, that the kids DIDN’T pay for the lemonade they’re now giving away, or Terry’s belief that selling something you have no ownership over is somehow superior to giving it away for free.

Too late. :slight_smile:


Terry Savage is just a miserable malcontented “fucked up in the head” type person.

I’ll buy that for a dollar.

“I wouldn’t advise that, madam.”

Apoplexy at giving away lemonade? She’d have a heart attack if she saw the Free Hugs people I saw in Toronto last week…

Also, maybe Ms. Savage didn’t fully consider what the kids’ whole business strategy was.

Perhaps their lemonade wasn’t just ordinary lemonade but really good lemonade. So good that you could say it was addictive. However, the average consumer has no way of knowing this beforehand so, in order to distinguish the lemonade from the lemonade sold at the half-dozen or so stands in the neighborhood, they gave it away for free. Sure enough, the stand is besieged with thirsty customers who quickly consume the delicious sunshine-yellow concoction and (with the exception of one cranky old lady in a limousine) are all grateful for the generosity displayed by the big-hearted kids.

The next day, the kids make their lemonade and open their stand again. But this time the lemonade is no longer free but instead goes for the price of 25 cents a cup. Most of the people who drank the lemonade for free the day before return and, despite taking brief pause at the new price, buy the beverage because it’s soooo good and still a bargain at a quarter. At the same time, the stand attracts new customers because the price is still far less than other neighborhood stands.

The day after that, the kids sell their lemonade at an increased price of 50 cents a cup. However, all the previous customers from the previous two days return along with others who have heard via word-of-mouth about the great lemonade they sell at the stand. Sure, the price increase may be a little irritating but it’s more than worth it considering the must-have quality of the lemonade.

Anyway, each day this pattern of behavior continues: the kids make the lemonade and slightly increase the price and the customers all return to buy it at the new higher price. Soon, the lemonade is going for $10 a cup but is still selling out because, for some reason, customers can’t resist going back for their daily fix of the beverage.

Remember Faith, Hope, and Charity? In Conservamerica, there is only Faith.