What’s the best exclamation for when you want to swear out loud and shout and scream (maybe because you’ve just dropped something heavy on your foot, like maybe a TV, or something)?
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“Holy Mother of Mary Pickford!” is a favorite of mine.
“Odds fish!” and “Jiminy Crickets!” also come in handy.
Over the past few days right here on the Boards, I’ve used “Holy Ned!” and “Boy howdy!”
“Holy Moley!” is also good, especially if you’re a Captain Marvel fan.
“Sacre bleu” ?
I’ve always gone with “Holy jumpin’ Jehosaphat in a fryin’ pan”
I was always a fan of “Great Googly-Moogly!”
I’ve even used here a couple of times.
I don’t use it, but I love to see “Jesus Christ on a pogo stick”.
That one always cracks me up.
“Cheese and crackers”
“Jeepers Creepers”
“Holy smoke”
These are all for the kiddie crowd, when you don’t want to offend anyone. On the other hand, for when there are no children present,
“Jesus sufferin’ Christ on a cross” and
“I’ll be dipped in shit and rolled over twice”
work just fine.
“I’m as amazed as… an amazed thing”
“I’ll go t’ foot of our stairs!”
“Well I’ll bare my arse at’t’town hall steps!”
“I’m so mad I could crush a grape!”
“Gorndon Bennett!” - this is more a Cockney thing but I’ve absolutely no idea who or what he was.
Ask and ye shall receive:
My late wife never swore. Never. When we started going out one of the things she hated about me was my potty mouth. Being the sensitive guy that I am I tried hard to substitute innocuous phrases and exclamations for the usual blue-tinged cloud that would erupt from my mouth when I stubbed my toe, bumped my head, etc.
One day I found the perfect epithet courtesy of “The Simpsons.” Now, when I stub my toe, etc. etc. you’ll hear me holler “GM Chrysler!” It made Helen happy and for some reason it fit nicely into my lexicon.
Just my $.02
Yer pal,
Zappo
First heard this from a Calculus professor:
“Jeruselum!”
But you have to say it like “GEE!-ruselum!”
I’ve always been fond of Bill Murray’s “Mother pusbuckets…” in Ghostbusters. It works better as a stunned whisper than an exclamation, however.
Lately, I’ve been partial to “Bastard fudgemonkeys!”
Also from the Simpsons: “Oh for the love of crumbcake…” Or ‘crimeny’ or “Crackerjack” or ‘Crispy Critters’ or ‘Crunchberries’ or ‘Crystal Light’ or ‘Krispy Kreme’…
“Oh, Fuddruckers!”
Maybe I should just say, “Oh for the love of product placement”.
I’m another one partial to “Mother Pus-Bucket.”
Not too long ago (about the time I started watching The Sopranos) I got into the bad habit of saying “F*ck me.” Thanks to an exclamation used in Snatch, though, I’ve been working on substituting “Hold me tight.” Which is OK because most of the things I swear at just want to cuddle anyway. 
My mother used to say Hell’s a-poppin’ I always got a kick out of that.
SACK!!!. Sounds dirty, but it isn’t. Also useful in phrases like “that sackin’ thing”, “the freeway was sacked”, or “You meatsack!”
I came across “Nerts” when playing Scrabble. I am trying to incorporate this into my exclamation lexicon, despite its mild, unsatisfactory sound. It’s so very harmless…
Nerts is my favorite card game ever! Ever!
Anyway, I am partial to “Jumpin’ Johesephat!”
By the way, Kendo, how did you get quotation marks to show up in your thread title? Is it two apostophes together? I must know.
You can use double quotes, just don’t post the “previewed” thread; this is what makes part of the title disappear.