I think Women Should Buy The Guy an Engagement Present(let the gender war begin)

You guys are right about us wimmin ignoring Bill’s marginally misogynist ramblin’s; I didn’t really even notice them until you pointed them out. I guess I see the name Wildest Bill and don’t even notice stuff like that anymore. I must be getting pretty mellow in my old age :slight_smile:

Three months? When did it become three months?

Twenty years ago it was ONE month. Then about ten years ago I started hearing “Two months,” which is new. Now it’s three?

That said, a good diamond sure as hell isn’t glass. If you shop, believe me, you can tell the difference between a good one and a bad one. It doesn’t take long to learn.

We can get matching rings, with semiprecious stones, custom-designed, and i wil have them make a tie tack for him from the same design, same gemstons, and then i can get a matching pendant.
Wouldn’t this be a good plan?

I bought my wife an engagement ring, several months after we were engaged. Still haven’t got her a wedding ring, though she bought me one (with money borrowed from one of my exes!). We didn’t have a very traditional courtship, however.

Etiquette doesn’t require an engagement ring, with or without a diamond, to validate an engagement. The diamond engagement ring is a tradition of fairly short standing. The 3 month salary rule was established by the jewelry companies. Personally, I got married with a simple band only. On our 10th anniversary, my husband bought me a diamond ring of his own design. It has a 1/5 c. diamond in the middle, a smaller ruby and opal to one side (his birthstone, and mine) and another ruby and an alexandrite (the kid’s birthstones) to the other. I love the ring, but it was his idea to buy it for me – he wanted me to have a diamond. Most of the women I’ve known do NOT have rings that equal 3 months salary. A few, but not most. A jeweler told me last year that $1000 - $1500 is the most common price-range for engagement rings and that, in any given month he will usually sell more under that range than over it. My own ring cost around a grand.

Most women DO buy engagement or wedding presents for their guys.

I think that mega-weddings (weddings costing 30-50 grand) are ridiculous. However, the vast majority of these weddings are NOT paid for be the parents of the bride. Usually, the parents of the bride and groom chip in what they can and the rest is paid for by the bridal couple. It isn’t uncommon to find a couple engaged for 2 or 3 years, in order to save up the money for the wedding. www.ultimatewedding.com has a fascinating message board that will tell you more than you ever wanted to know about mega-weddings and the people who plan them.

So, let’s see – looks like Wildest Bill was wrong on every count. What a shock, huh?

5-10 thousand dollars for an engagement ring? Why?

What kind of woman would want to marry a man who’s so irresponsible with her money?

That’s exactly how Jim and I felt, Alessan. We talked about the two-month’s salary rule and burst out laughing. The very idea of spending a downpayment on a house on one little ring for me was ludicrous to us. As it turned out, we got very lucky because Jim won a nice diamond at a staff party, so we were able to get a thousand dollar ring for $500 (right in our price range), which is more than enough for me.

What- you didn’t read the OP or something?


I always thought it was 2 months salary. Not that I spent that on my wife’s engagement ring - it cost me $3000 (though it was appraised at $4300).

I spent about 2 months salary on Astrogirl’s engagement ring… and got a BEAUTIFUL diamond for that money! It’s .590 carats, traditional round-cut (I forget what that’s called now), color grade H, clarity grade SI2 (externally flawless, internally there are a couple of small clouds/inclusions, etc.)… I did my homework before I bought it, so I knew what to look for. And it looks gorgeous on her finger!

I’m happy with it (though I did, and still do worry about the “diamonds covered in blood” aspect… wish I had known about the Canadian diamonds when I was shopping…but what’s up with the Polar bear engraved on the diamond? Doesn’t that interfere with the refraction of light inside? ), and more importantly, Astrogirl is happy.

As far as her buying me an engagement present: (in my case) Why? My present is HER agreeing to marry me! I get to wake up next to an angel every day for the rest of my life (after we marry, that is… I point this out because I’m alone tonight)! I win! I’m still amazed that she said yes!

As for the marriage ceremony: I don’t give a rat’s ass! AG can tell me where, when, and what to wear, and I’ll be there wearing whatever! When the preacher-guy asks me “do you?”, I’ll try to be polite, and not to say “F*** YEAH!”

What can I say? I like tradition… and I realize how lucky I am!

Here’s the link for Polar Bear Diamonds - apparently, the polar bear is laser-inscripted on the girdle of the diamond. How they managed to get a diamond company started without Debeers sticking their fingers in, I don’t know.

I like the tradition of the engagement ring. I figure if a guy asks a woman to marry him, but doesn’t give her a ring, he’s not all that serious about it. It doesn’t have to be expensive, though.

The ring I got for my wife was much, much cheaper than a month’s salary. I designed it, and used an emerald instead of a diamond. Emeralds are as or more expensive than diamonds, and prone to breakage, so I used a man-made emerald. It’s just like the naturally occurring type, but cheaper and guaranteed against breakage, which is goofy considering the stone only cost $25. My wife loves her ring, and is pleased that I had the sense not to break the bank buying it.

She didn’t get me an engagement present. When I popped the question, it was a surprise to her, so how could she have been able to put in the planning and saved the money to buy me something in return? She did get me my wedding band, though. It was also custom designed, and has inlaid meteorite. She knew I’d love a ring from outer space.

As far as diamond engagement rings go, apparently most brides want a one carat rock. This is reflected in the price of diamonds…anything under a carat, even .99 carat, is way cheaper than a full carat. Stupid, isn’t it?

I disagree that the parents should split the cost of the wedding. The bride and groom should pay for it themselves. My wedding cost something like $7000, (mostly on the catered dinner) which is a lot of money, but we had everything we wanted without spending tens of thousands of dollars. That’s just insane. The wedding industry is made up of evil, moneygrubbing bastards, and they warp many young girls’ minds into thinking that the one-day wedding is more important than the life-long marriage.

[nitpick]Actually, the cutoff point is about .94, not .99. Anything .95-.96 to 1.04 or so is considered a “one-carat”, so you have to go to the “near-carats” of .90 to .94 to get a price break. Of course, all the stones will have their exact weight listed, they won’t lie and call a .96 stone a true one-carat, but if you’re just a few points from a carat you still have to pay a carat’s premium price.[/nitpick]

The company looks fantastic. I’ve always loved the look of diamonds but I didn’t want to support DeBeers with my money. And that polar bear is just too cute!

I bought a 2-carat diamond tennis bracelet for my wife tonight. It was $1999, marked down from $3800 or so. She was happy. 8^)

My fiancee isn’t concerned in the least with the quality or size of her ring. We discussed it, and she and I both think that the only important part of our getting married is the fact that we get to marry each other. I am getting her a 1/4 carat ring, and our wedding is costing less than $1000 dollars total. She was picky about her gown, though, and insisted on buying a brand new, tailored wedding gown. It cost a me grand total of 5000 pesos, ($100).

After discussing the best way to spend the money I have available for all wedding expenses, we decided together that the best value for the money was an inexpensive ring, a cheap wedding, and spending the bulk of the money on our honeymoon.

She isn’t getting me anything that I know of, and it won’t upset me in the least if she doesn’t. She’s going to marry me. I’m still more than a little in awe over this. I get to marry her. I get to have this wonderful, thoughtful, very smart, cheerful, lovely young woman for my wife. I get to have this responsible, caring, nuturing woman be the mother of my children. Anything she could buy with money would be inconsequential compared to that.

well. if a women get a guy an engagement ring, it would mean that the guy is incapable to afford just a simple engagement ring or even loves that particular he is with.
Like mine, I pay for his food,movie, everything. He didn’t even want to pay anything. LIke so useless as a guy, scare of his parent always late, find excuses for not paying. If such a guy exist, isn’t it such a disgrace?

This post was totally worth bumping a ten-year-old thread for. Want to give this another shot, but in coherent English this time?

Can I use this as a sig?

This thread is far too old with too many participants no longer around. If someone wants to start a new thread on the topic, feel free.