I wasn't trying to be rude but...

What is that supposed to mean?

Seriously, I don’t know…is that good or bad?

She said you’re stupid and are lying about changing your ways.

While I wouldn’t be so harsh in my criticizement, I do admit I’m more than a little hesitant to believe you’ve learned your lesson as well. How many times have you posted this same basic OP now? Either you have a low learning curve or you’re not really listening to the advice you’ve ostensibly been seeking.

Oh I see, then everything is ok…hey wait a minute!!!

It’s not that I had a revelation and decided right then and there to change my ways. I’m just saying it’s an ongoing process and every now and then I will do something that “sets me back” then feel bad about it, learn from it and try to move on.
Most people in real life like me but I am who I am and these things happen and that’s why I try to keep myself in check.
I mean I really don’t want to end up in jail or getting my ass kicked.
Remember the “Tell Me I wasn’t completely out of line” thread that I’m to lazy to link to right now, well even after all that I ended up apologizing and making friends with one of the people involved.
Anyway I am fully aware that any thread one STARTs can come back to haunt them so I won’t be surprised when someone mentions this the next time they think I’m completely out of line.

S’cuse me? What* low-level sniping* have I been involved in before Veb? I’m not making nicey-nice, but responding to a thread where I think the OP was seeking validation for his arseholishness. He’s as sharp as a fucking brick and needs a granite boulder to knock some sense into him.

IMHO of course.

My mind boggles at the notion that poverty provides some sort of inoculation against embarassment.

Seems to me that your extended riff at his expense goes beyond mere lack of impulse control.

Wow. That was a really horrible thing you did. That poor guy!

I don’t think he did this by accident. He did it with intention.

To have a good time, get a laugh out of the staff. And that’s exactly what happened.

He can try and dress it up any way he like’s, there was no sincere curiousity, he didn’t ‘just want to know’.


And now he’s come here to boast about this shockingly rude behaviour.

Can I ask you all sincerely, does anyone reading this honestly beleive he’s not sure if this was rude or not?

You need to be reminded that everything you are ever going to become you are currently in the process of becoming. Looks like you’re planning to be obnoxious, rude, and cold hearted towards your fellows.

How you can call yourself a Christian is beyond me. You are the very manifestation of why some many people loath Christians, if you ask me.

START, I don’t think you are an evil punk kid. But I do think you’re hanging with the wrong crowd. How do I know this? Well, it seems to me that when you are with your friends, you tend to do assholish stuff.

Are you a leader or a follower? If a friend says “let’s do this” and you know it’s wrong, do you decline or do you go along?

Do you feel as cool or cooler than your friends? When we feel less cool than our peers, we do stupid stuff to earn favor in their eyes.

Are you louder around your friends than you are in general? Does your personality change a whole bunch when you are in their company? Do they exhibit Christian-like behavior, or do you always have to apologize for their behavior? Do you feel like you have to hide your truth self from them or put on an identity that’s not really yours to have fun with them?

I know a good crowd wouldn’t have laughed and egged you on. As soon as that comment had flown out of your mind, one of your friends should have jabbed you on the arm and given you the “not cool, dude” signal. Too bad they didn’t.

Also, I think you are pretty smart enough to know that you were rude and wrong. And you knew you were rude when you asked the question, don’t deny it.

The guy probably knew you were just kid, but a few years from now, your ass will be grown. You won’t be able to get away with your rudeness by saying “I didn’t mean it!” So enjoy your impunity while it lasts.

In the meantime, practice being a quieter soul.

See, this really says it all right here.
If you really cannot control the space between your brain and your mouth, I mean, REALLY can’t control it, then maybe you need to seek some medication.
Have you ever been tested for Tourette’s syndrome?

If, however, you can and choose not to because it’s hard (which, let’s face it, sometimes it is, and that’s part of growing up) or because you want to impress your friends, maybe you should ask yourself: are they really the type of people who warrant or deserve your time or effort?
I really doubt it.
Honestly, yeah, a lot of guys, especially young ones, may have left the store and joked about it, or said, “Man, that poor bastard” or whatever.

But I believe there’s a strong positive correlation between kids who would be that mean and ones who are destined to end up like that guy.

In other words, it sounds like your friends are monster losers, and I’ll bet on some level you know that.

Can you do better?

I should also say that I know how it feels, to say something that’s hilarious in front of one audience while being potentially hurtful in another. I have a sense of humor that can get carried away sometimes. When I your age, I was a big class clown. I used to make fun of the teachers to their face–and sometimes I pissed them off without meaning to. I never got in real trouble for it, but I remember once being sent to the hallway as “time-out”. And this was in high school!

I was a class clown because 1)I love to make people laugh and 2)I felt insecure about myself, and by intentionally making people laugh, I could avoid being laughed at. Now, I’m still kinda funny but I’m more style over substance. When I say something, I want it to be witty rather than simply funny. And with some maturity, I’ve learned how to control my “let’s be funny” impulse". You will too, I promise.

F. Scott Fitzgerald said it best: “Whenever you feel like criticizing anyone, just remember that all the people in this world haven’t had the advantages that you’ve had.”

The Great Gatsby, Pg. 1

START, you have a habit of posting descriptions of obnoxious (or even, dare I say it? - assholish) things you do, then asking if it was really so bad to have done it.

Personally, I think you know damn well what you’ve done is wrong.

Seconded, and although this is the IMHO forum, I will say nothing further since my opinion would be better stated in another.

[Official Moderator Warning]Do not insult posters outside of The BBQ Pit again[/Official Moderator Warning]

I don’t know if you’re actually looking for a factual answer, but I know in areas where women do a lot of hard labor (picking crops, etc) they buy used bras because they’re only going to get sweaty and gross. Why spend $$$ on something that’s only going to get trashed?

Also, he might not have been buying them to wear as underpants. Maybe he was using them for a gag gift, craft project, or maybe he only wears boxers but needed “tighty-whities” for a funny superhero costume or something.

I see a lot of people buying the bags of half-used shampoos and hotel soaps and wonder why they would do that (especially when it’s not that big a savings) but I guess maybe they use them for laundry or to wash the dog or something.

Bottom line is: none of my business, really!

I don’t think you get it, either, given some of your comments in this thread and your previous threads on similar topics.

I was once homeless and penniless–I couldn’t even afford used underwear! I had nothing but the clothes on my back, and I was given “gently used” clothing (including bras, underwear and socks) by a charitable organization. I felt a lot of shame and distaste at wearing someone else’s used underthings (and the clothes were ill-fitting and uncomfortable). It was a low point in my life and having some teenagers give me a hard time about it would have been too much. Especially if the cashier got in on the laughter. How humiliating, to be laughed right out of the store.

I had to shop exclusively second-hand for a few years, so I had to get over it. I still shop second-hand for a lot of things (like jeans). I don’t think it’s gross at all, since like Bricker said, everything can be washed. As long as it’s in good condition with no visible staining, who cares? I sometimes buy second-hand bras, actually, but I can afford packaged, brand new underwear and I can afford to be posting to the Straight Dope message board, and for these things I am grateful. I don’t think it’s funny at all what you’ve done.

Good start.

No, you did intend to embarrass him – or at least be an “accessory to embarrassment, second degree” :slight_smile: – on the basis of what you said in the OP. You recognize it’s wrong – admit it, learn from it, and move on. “I didn’t intend to…” is a valid defense only under the age of eight, or in a circumstance where you could reasonably be ignorant of the consequences of an act (e.g., throwing the switch that runs the garbage disposal when you reasonably thought it was a light switch).

It’s called “mob mentality” because that’s exactly how it works – one person heterodynes off another’s comments and perceived attitude, taking it to a level nobody intended at the start.

Excellent. A suggestion – take a look over in GD, at my “THREE requirements” thread – just the quotes, not the discussion. From how you’ve described yourself, what it’s saying in there should matter to you. Then figure out how to apply it to your daily life – and I’m quite well aware that in high school that can be a cast-iron bitch, so don’t be too hard on yourself about it. You may end up having to make compromises – but every day should be a little bit of an improvement. (I wouldn’t proselytize about that in IMHO as a rule – but by your own standards, it’s something important to you, so I’m stretching the rules a bit to urge you to think it through.)

And in any case, the Golden Rule is not purely Christian – it’s what all decent set as an ideal towards which they strive, in their own individual ways.

Impulsiveness is pretty normal for being young – and for not a few of us older types too. But given your stated problems with it, it may be something that you in particular need to work on.

Think through what was said above about the group you were hanging with, and the business about leader/follower, too. Not as accusations – but rather as issues raised for your consideration, as a young adult, on how to deal with what life throws at you. See if it fits who you were being and who you want to be, and act on it (or not) accordingly.

As mentioned earlier, a lot of factory seconds end up at thrift shops that are perfect except for some flaw as stupid as tags being sewn in upside down or something.

I worked for a garment manufacturer and there was also times wed donate overstock simply because we couldn’t store it any longer and the quantites were too small for any retailer to want. So we’d send two boxes of brand new, perfect condition t-shirts, jerseys, shorts, or whatnot to the Goodwill thrift shop.

Some of the thrift shops here sell brand new socks in bag of six pairs, and they have huge bins of underwear (all factory seconds and overstock), for bargain prices.

You’ll sometimes also see remaindered stock from retail stores – our thrift store had a whole rack of indentical suits (nice ones!) that came from a suit store that just couldn’t sell them and wanted the floor space they were taking up.

Bottom line, don’t go thinking that thrift stores are “used clothing only”.

And SART that was really deplorable. Degrading another person (and a complete stranger no less) for your own amusement is simply not acceptable.

People think that I am asking* if* I was rude but I* know * I was rude, the original title of this thread was going to be “I was extremely rude today” but then I changed it to the title it has now.
Then also as bad as what I did was, I may have made it seem worse with comments about the guy having a high “embarassment thresh hold”. I may have made it seem worse at least in terms of my attitude about it.
I may be an asshole sometimes but insulting people is out of character for me unless they do it first but nevertheless thats what happened and if the underwear really isn’t used I’d buy it too.

Thrift shops will take used bras? I’m so glad to hear that, because I’ve got several old bras that don’t fit anymore and I’ve been wondering what to do with them. I figured there must be people who’d be willing to wear them even though they’re kinda worn out, but wasn’t sure any store would take them even as a donation.