Hiya all. After my last afternoon class today was over, a pretty girl I sorta-kinda know put her hand up to my face and stroked my cheek, then asked if I was growing a beard.
Somewhat taken aback, I replied that I was, but planned to abandon the effort soon. We talked about something unrelated for a few moments before she left and I was left alone to ponder the implications of the act.
Semi-intimate physical contact from a casual acquaintance; mundane curiosity about the habits of a classmate, or shamless flirtation and an indication of interest?
Since I usually move with all the speed and grace of a geriatric clydesdale in these matters, I look to you all for your opinion. And also, what do you do when you want to flirt or let someone know you think they’re swell?
One became great by expecting the possible, another by expecting the eternal, but he who expected the impossible became greater than all. -Kierkegaard
I’m female. I’ve been guilty of, and know a lot of other females (and males, for that matter) who’ve been guilty of, flirting without having any real interest.
It doesn’t matter, though. If you’re interested, ask her out. You don’t have anything to lose! Don’t hold it against her, though, if she turns you down. She may even continue flirting with you! Ah, well. Nobody said this wasn’t confusing.
Sure, I’m guilty of that. So what’s the problem? Flirting is supposed to be fun. Even without interest it makes for a good excuse for conversation. It is a way of the member of the opposite sex to remember you.
I say take it slow. Don’t pounce on that one flirt, you don’t want to scare her away by looking desperate. Flirt back, but subtly. If you make eye contact, hold it for a little. Maybe wink at her then walk away. Sure some people are not into those games, but they are just not good at it or just not fun. Always remember, If it does not work, you can always go out with the guys.
OK - I’ll give you the answer. Yes. Yes it is flirting. Now it is your turn. Sit next to her and speak softly into her ear and see how she reacts. Make eye contact. Listen to what she says and see if there are further clues. Just go slow and see how far things develop. Flirting is just playing off of someone else - you have to just react to what’s happening.
If you were really close, then the answer might be differemt. But if you “kinda-sorta” know her, then she wouldn’t make such a move if she weren’t interested, IMHO.
Finally, the best way to get in with a woman - COMPLIMENTS. I repeat COMPLIMENTS. Say you like her hair. Say you like her shoes. Say you like her dress. ANYTHING. Compliments will get you EVERYWHERE! There’s a funny Homer Simpson quote on the subject, but it eludes me - regardless, it’s as true as it’s funny.
Hell, I’d love to give you some great wisdom on the current subject, but hell, my Girlfriend says I am more dense than a black hole. I couldnt pick up a clue it I had Sherlock Homes leading me around my the nose. Short of Grabing me by the back of the head and kissing me, my Girlfriend said every clue and hint she sent me for 3 weeks went right over the top of the head.
Back to the current question; I guess that shes flirting with you. Go for it, whats the worst that could happen, ya get shot down?
The fact that I “kinda-sorta” know her is what made me not sure of what was going on. If a platonic female friend had done the same thing, I’d brush it off as touchy-feely girl behavior (not to disparage that type of behavior). Also, a week or two ago she gave me a couple of suggestive looks that I thought might be signals, but I figured I was probably misinterpreting her. I shall ponder the next couple of days till the next class.
By the way, I think the Homer Simpson quote alluded to went something like: “Women gobble up compliments like ordinary men eat peanuts. . . Mmm, peanuts.”
One became great by expecting the possible, another by expecting the eternal, but he who expected the impossible became greater than all. -Kierkegaard
Ask her out. She’s either really flirtatious, and therefore used to being called on it, or she’s really interested in you. Either way, you won’t get a surprise rejection.