I just saw the images of the absolute squalor of Saddam H’s last hideout. Gads… how typical! As soon as the fawning, terrified staff of maids and launderers and chefs (and foodtasters) and barbers and manicurists (& etc., etc.) are gone, things just start to go to pot with these despot types.
It’s as if they didn’t even know how to operate a clotheswashing machine by themselves!
SO, imagine the Queer Eye guys helping out the Ba’athists. Feel free to use any palace, any hideaway, any boat or car… Where to begin?!?
[Setting: SH’s last hideaway.]
[Thom, upon seeing the mess of broken eggshells on the floor]: “Does this make any sense?!? I just don’t understand this!”
[Kyan, seeing the Manson-esque beard]: “You haven’t been using any conditioners, have you, Saddam?”
Jai: “When you go out on a date, you don’t bring the lady back here, do you?”
Ted [going through the pantry]: “Well, at least I haven’t found any SPAM yet. But I also haven’t found any real food, either…”
Carson [picking through the dirty laundry on the floor and the bed]: “Ugh, look what I’ve found… SKID MARKS!”