Melin
Even sounds wizardy
Well I tried to build a real to life Bag End in my backyard - didn’t turn out so well - however the treehouse came out great. I wouldn’t mind being Bilbo. I absolutley love adventuring, and I’ve been around long enough methinks, and I love a nice humble puff of the finest weed of the south farthing (sp?)…
Did I mention I love mountains?
Hey, can I be Eowyn? I’m well intentioned but inclined to shoot off my mouth without thinking. Plus, I’m all feminist and gender-bendy with the rules of society and stuff. At least one evil dude wanted to marry me. And I like horses a lot. And my daddy.
I nominate Polycarp as the board’s resident Gandalf.
Sounds friendly to me. 
OOOHHH!!
Can I be Denethor ? ! ?
Bitter, powerless, defensive, tedious, heartless and maniacally self destructive!
“Bring beer and nachos”
Gender difference aside, I think it’s quite clear that Lynn Bodoni is Mandos, the Doomsayer of the Valar. Ed Zotti would presumably be Manwe, the one closest to Illuvatar, and penultimate authority over Creation. jdavis, master of technology and of the stuff of which the world is made, is a clear choice for Aule. And I’d like to argue for TubaDiva as Elbereth Gilthoniel, but I can’t quite think of a justification.
I’m cool with that. But who’s going to be my Goldberry?
A well-known adventurer who does nothing but show up and say everything is going to hell, then be about my merry way. Sounds great.
That would make me Radagast the Brown!
Just a nitpick to an otherwise inspired OP, but the Istari are Maiar. That would put them on a par with the mods, which isn’t misplaced IMH, though.
If I gauge this correctly, I am the orc on the frontlines at Helmsdeep that dies when the old guy accidentally lets his arrow fly.
Heh, buck up little camper, that makes you no mere rabble of orc. You’d be an Uruk-Hai! Your armor is thick, and your shield brawn. And your luck incredibly poor.
Are you thinking of mellon?
Melian might be a good fit for her, based on what I’ve read about Dope history. I’ll let somewhat else decide.
Oooh! He carries the mark of the white hand. 
I was going to nominate Diogenes the Cynic. Once wise, now spiralling into insanity. Can I say that if we’re not in the Pit? No, I actually like **DtC **a lot, but ever since his gaze was stolen by Bush (the human palantir), he just hasn’t been the same!
All I know about LotR, I learned from my (one) viewing of the three films so I have no idea what I, as one of the most prolific* 2002ers, would be. Any ideas, anyone? Preferably someone at least somewhat amoral… I don’t want my hands bound by a pesky conscience in such a world.
*What I lack in quality, I make up for in quantity. Or something.
Yes, I was. I’m glad somebody got it. You may not be as clueless as you appear.
Yeah, I think I’m Shagrat. Doesn’t trust anybody, especially the Big Bosses; and by the sound of his dialog with Gorbag, he’s a fallen Elf, immortal, and with memory stretching back to at least the end of the Second Age. We know he made it at least as far as the Dark Tower, or the Mouth of Sauron (and who should he be?) would never have gotten ahold of the Mithril coat. Did any of the Orcs of Mordor escape? I wonder. Tolkien made an abortive start on another story, set in the Fourth Age, and some orcs certainly do appear to have survived Sauron’s last fall. If any could have, I should think that Shagrat would have been among them: The only survivor of the carnage of Cirith Ungol.
Figwit.
Actually, no, I’d rather be someone from the novel.
Pick some minor, anonymous eldar.