When I first signed up to the Dope, back before the Charter Member crusade when there were a lot more temporal Dopers, I considered the following names:
El-ahrairah (the warren’s trickster god in Watership Down)
Ignatius J. (from Confederacy of Dunces)
Cool Papa J, Pillsbury and Space Invaders (various nicknames I’ve had over the years)
Farqhuar “Sidemeat” Lewis (my jazz name)
Dudley Calmar (first pet [w. male human name] and first street [that could be a surname- the actual formula would yield War Eagle Rural Route One]) or Bo Calmar, Bela Calmar or Fritz Calmar (other arguable “first pet” names, but technically those pets belonged to my siblings)
San Simien (a former posting name on other boards)
The Aubergine Koala (my “wrong answer” to an old riddle
What are some of the options you’d use if you had to choose a new name today?
I’ve been thinking about this recently. I don’t think I ever would, though - I’ve developed an identity here and I’d like to keep it, faults and all. Or maybe I just have no shame. I’ve come up with:
Poodle ChiChi - I don’t care much for poodles, and I’m not terribly stylish… it just sounds funny and frivolous. I like funny and frivolous.
Modern Life Is Rubbish - an early Blur album. I just like the phrase.
Gumby, No! - From the Gumby short “Robot Rumpus” on MST3K. I think Crow shouts it out. Can’t remember. It’s a phrase I use often now, whenever I feel mock astonishment.
Cherry Blossom Girl - an Air song I like muchly.
Hairdresser On Fire - heh. A song by Morrissey. I love it. I’m not a hairdresser, nor am I on fire in any sense. However, it makes me laugh myself to tears. My husband recently sang his own interesting version, calling it “paint salesman on fire”, in reference to his job (a little misleading, since he’s not a paint salesman, but he does work with paint in a vague way, and he had to find a way to make it fit properly), and when my dear husband does the strange moaning that Morrissey does in that song, he sounds like Kermit the Frog. This also moves me to tears. Gasping, laughing tears.
On a sports-related board, I was Purple Raid (playing off the Prince song Purple Rain as well as the Purple Raiders of Ohio’s Mount Union College, a Division III football power and the alma mater of a women’s basketball player my brother worked with). Of course, the fact that the blitherings of The Grapist once sullied this board would cause me to think long and hard about using any name that might be misconstrued as a tribute to that clown.
I might go with the name of one of the underappreciated figures of American history, political boss Thurlow Weed, not to be confused with Tammany Hall’s William Marcy “Boss” Tweed.
Outlaw Wolf. Recent events made me think of that as an attractive and exceptionally apt option sometime for the future – but not here. Can’t be bothered changing from Ice Wolf here.
Welcome Conbracos. I’d explain it, but the explanation is amusing to not a soul on the face of the Earth save for two people. I’m one of those people, and if you’re reading this, I’m reasonably confident that you’re not the other one. It beats out my other choice, which was…
Beefman the Omnipotent. Another in-joke, but it just doesn’t roll off the mental tongue as well as the first.
Heck, I may even get around to changing it one of these days…I’ve just grown kinda fond of people calling me Roland.
The Emperor Fabulous – Not that I’m all that especially fab, but it has a nice sound to it, doesn’t it? There really should’ve been an emperor Fabulous.
Pope Hilarius – There actuallly was a Pope Hilarius, back around 460 CE. If we can have a Pope Hilarius, why not an Emperor Fabulous?
Ulicious – Just an actual name I bumped into recently.
I’ve been giving this some thought, actually. Mine was chosen in my haste to jump into a discussion, and I’ve never been happy with it. My user name elsewhere has always been wisdomy, but that seemed to beg a smackdown around here.
I’ve been thinking of Artemisia, but I haven’t decided anything.
I’ve come up with: