If you're gonna listen to shitty music atleast wear headphones

I’m setting in the con course working on a paper due in a couple of days. It’s quiet here, the vending machine is humming peacifully, the classes are pretty much over for the day so the building is empty except for echoing click clack of the occasional person walking by, oh and the complete tool a few tables over listening to garbage.

Dear tool, I would sooner go to a “nickleback and celine dion do all their songs while tossing each other’s salad with explosive diarrhea” concert then continue to set here in ear shot of your rank tunes for another minute.

Your music is the auditory bastard love of tubgirl AND goatse. I think maybe it was mention in Dante’s Inferno because only a vengeful God would be able to cook up a punishment as tormenting as setting here in earshot.
Good Day.

Con course?

No, see, if he likes the music, that means it’s really good, and nobody could possibly not like it. So you really should be thanking him for letting you listen to music he knows you like.

If the students around here are any indication, him wearing headphones wouldn’t help your situation at all. I’m frequently bombarded by music coming out of someone’s ipod earbuds from across the room. I have no idea how they can A) listen to their music that loudly and not suffer brain damage, and B) have absolutely no idea the people shooting them dirty looks can very clearly hear their trashy music.

You imply there’s something there to be damaged.

Criminology lecture?

Halfway school.

So you have to listen to Shirley Manson singing?

Could be worse: the complete garbage a few tables over could be listening to Tool.

Tool would have been acceptable, even encouraged.

If Shirley Manson sounds like a screech owl being painfully electrocuted at a turrets convention then maybe it was.

oh and *con-course

Hahaha. Thank you. I do love a good turn of the phrase.

Seriously, if you want a secure job in the future, become an audiologist. There’s going to be a huge spike in demand when the generation who retarded blasted their earbuds at full volume goes 90% deaf by age 40.

Si, Senor. I lost my hearing the Old-Fashioned way, at concerts. These kids have more hearing loss than I by age 25 without the concert cred to legitimize it. Note: I’m not saying they don’t go to concerts. I’m just saying their hearing was gone before they went. Which, if I think about it, so was mine.

Real conversation:

Me, taking off my headphones, which had reverberated across the room: That, my children, is why Daddy is half deaf.

My Children: Yeah, we figured that out.

Best concert I’ve ever been to. I had front row seats!

Garbage has a few good songs. Don’t knock em!

And it is a never ending spiral.

I need really good headphones now.

When did “set” become a synonym for “sit”? I’m aware of “set” meaning to place someone or something in a sitting position, thus, “I set myself down”, but “I’m setting”? just reads weird to me.

Addendum: people who listen to shit music should have noise-reduction headphones/earphones. I’ve heard plenty of shitty music from people who have cheap headphones that project more outward than into their owners’ ears.

I was wondering about that myself.

Nevermind me…I’m the complete garbage a few tables over listening to tool.

C’mon, s/he’s going to school. Didn’t say that they were finished.