I always HATED crap like life partner, life mate, significant other, and all those other euphemisms.
I’m glad the media is finally just calling the spouse of a gay man his husband, or the spouse of a lesbian her wife. Everyone knows what these terms mean, and it helps to normalize the relationship. Making up whacky newspeak euphemisms did nothing but isolate and otherize the couples.
I think “husband” and “wife” have been in use for some time here in Canada. I don’t think I’ve heard “life partner” or “life mate”, and I’ve heard “significant other” in various contexts, mostly in the context of someone’s unmarried partner, gay or straight.
I’m amused by it. The first time a man mentioned his husband to me, I did a mental double take. “Oh, right. That’s possible now.”
I was also amazed that, in a local political campaign, one attack ad mentioned that the candidate “took money from his husband.” Though the race was a hard-fought one, with plenty of dirt, this was the only reference to his being gay. Obviously, people picked up on it, but his opponent did not use that as a point of attack.
I like the word spouse which accurately describes the relationship without the need to delineate sexual orientation, whether they are/are not formally married. I like it!
Same here. I’ve been using it for years even with couples who never quite settled on a description for themselves. It just always seemed to have the right fit and intent.
I’ve always liked ‘‘partner’’ myself, as it works for people who seriously committed but not married regardless of gender or sexual orientation.
In a known situation of married persons I will say ‘‘husband/wife.’’ But if you’re asking a generic question of couples who may or may not share marital status or sexual orientation, ‘‘partner’’ works really well.
I’m with you on this one. A year or two ago, my mother and I were talking about a mutual (gay) acquaintance, and she something about “he and his partner”, and I thought “wait a minute, isn’t he a teacher? Since when do they have partners?”. We have ‘girlfriend’ and ‘boyfriend’, terms that not only cover unmarried people, but are orientation-neutral. I posit that we would benefit from a term to cover those with whom we’re in a long-term relationship but aren’t married to (that is, between ‘girl/boyfriend’ and ‘husband/wife’), but we have the terms, let’s use 'em. “Partner”, even when it’s not confusing, seems so generic to me. Kinda sterile and lifeless.
Yeah, probably more a hypothetical. I guess there might be gay men so “in” with the straight married women his relationship would be looked at as the same.
Although from my experience when one gender gets together into a group and talks, the second someone opposite joins the conversation always changes.