I’m going up north, to visit my dad & his wife at some cabin that they’ve borrowed from a friend. It’s about a half hour north of Mackinac Bridge. We’re taking our two kids, ages 3 years and 9 months. Oh yeah, we’re also taking my 6 year old stepson, and his 10 year old sister.
All of us, in a van for somewhere between 4 & 5 hours, then 8 of us in a cabin until Monday afternoon.
All together now: AAAAAAAAGH!
Anyway, I left you all some beer & chips. I don’t have any guns, but this is Flint. I think the party store at the corner sells them for cheap.
There’s extra toilet paper in the pantry, and some fudgesicles in the freezer. Don’t eat the green stuff in the fridge, okay? I don’t know what it is.
Save me a couple of beers, okay? And please don’t trash the backyard too badly. I might need to bury the children there when we get back.
Have a good weekend!
Have fun. I do not envy you. That many kids for that long of a trip?!? I’ll second the AAAAAGGGHH.
Hmmm, fudgesicles and beer, what a great combo. 
What was that about the Green stuff in the fridge? Do or Don’t eat it? I dunno, smells kinda good yet.
:: tries out the green stuff ::
What pretty lights. Wow man, like being on an acid trip.
THUMP!!
:: sleeping soundly on the kitchen floor ::
Fudgsicles? Are those like the infamous Crapsicles?
:::scratching out burial plot for Persephone’s kids:::
OK, the backhoe has to clear that area that I marked off for her mass gravesite. We dig here!!
My lucky 8-Ball has told me that her backyard is the next proven global oil reserve. Larger than all of Saudi Arabia!
Lemme just grab her last few beers, (putting IOU) in fridge. Hell, when she becomes an oil millionaire she can afford import brews!
:::loud sound of backhoe and explosive charges:::
:: startled awake by loud explosions and digging ::
Whoa, what a trip. Hey Bluepony, that grave site isn’t for me is it? I was just sleeping dude. And Do NOT try that green stuff in the fridge. Stuffs deadly.
Bluepony drank all the beer and JBurton ate the green stuff? Now what’re we gonna do for fun?
:::stepping over inert body of JBurton:::
Excuse me, I forgot the diaper bag.
:::looks out window, sees Bluepony…drilling for oil?:::
Hm. Hope he hits something. Then I can get some imported beer for the Summer Dopefest. Maybe even have enough left over for Cheesy Poofs.
Oh, there’s some darker green stuff waaaay in the back of the fridge, and I think there’s some blue stuff in the crisper. The blue stuff is pretty safe.
And yes, those are fudgesicles! Geez!
Okay, I’m leaving now. Really.
Oh, could somebody please feed the dog? I’d appreciate it.
Okay, who popped holes in the air mattress?
Sheesh – you can enter the house, but you will be searched for sharp objects now. Persephone is gonna kill us!
Whoever left their boxers in the bath, PLEASE claim them now, they are white with 
faces on them.
I brought another keg, but forgot the tap, someone please run to the liquor store and rent one, here’s $30 for the rental fee.
Oh and Persephone gave me explicit instructions to warn you of the neighbors. Seems they have a problem with daytime nudity. So ladies, keep your tops on during the day and men – they really are prude so keep your wieners in your shorts. Last time they almost called in the National Guard. Too large of members get the neighbors very envious. Specially that woman over there (see her?)evidently her husband is not well endowed in that area and about has an orgasm when she sees a big one. Sufficed to say, he gets pissed.
Well, enough of my motherly concerns, PARTY ON!
:: runs out to the liquor for Techchick and picks up the beer tap ::
Here ya go Tech. My pleasure. 
Hmmm, those shorts in the tub with the might be mine. I seem to be having trouble remembering things since i ate that green stuff in the fridge.
Did Persephone say there was some darker green stuff in there too?
:: digs into the fridge and finds the darker green stuff and the blue stuff ::
Hmmm, i dunno about this darker green stuff. She did say to feed the dog right? Here puppy, try this. How’s about that, the dog refused to eat it. I wonder why?
Hey, what’s the big idea of no day time nudity? Geez, lousy neighbors.
Gulp! Anybody want some of this dark green and blue sssstt…
Thump!!
zzzzzz zzzzz zzzz