I must have taken a wrong turn along the way. Can you tell me where I am at?
I suggest you backtrack to Albuquerque and check your directions. You probably made a wrong turn there.
Meanwhile, welcome to the Dope! The welcoming committee will be along as soon as we all [del]recover from the last initiation[/del] wake up.
Consider yourself lucky that your wrong turn landed you here. Sometimes wrong turns can lead you to encounters with cannibalistic mountain men grossly disfigured through generations of in-breeding.
You’re on the threshold of hell.
From where I am now, I can’t see Macy’s or the food court. I’m right by Sunglass Hut and that weird knife store with all the poser badasses.
I’m not convinced that I took a wrong turn. I like it here.
Whoa… How did you know I was about to head into Macy’s?
I bought a cool purse yesterday at Macy’s so I am feeling magnanimous towards it. So I will state that it is only a projection of hell onto our hapless world during the Christmas shopping season. There is something hell-ish about the revolving doors though. Sure you can leave! Oops, spun you right back in!
I was once stuck in a revolving door for three days. They had to call the fire department to get me out.
Pretty slow moving fire department you got there!
I’m in Ohio. That should explain many things.
I have family roots there, which probably explains that far-away look in my eyes.
In the words of my mother, Og rest her soul, who would answer thusly when I asked in similar way, “Up in Lizzie’s room behind the at.”
Welcome! Would you like some ice cream? I just made it, and the wasabi was fresh. 
Ok… now I am getting freaked out.
First, you know I am in Ohio. Ok, someone checked out my IP, no biggie.
Now, you know the thread that brought me here was about revenge on someone stealing ice cream.
Hold me.
Um, have you showered since being stuck in the revolving door for three days?
After a while, the Dope feels more like the front yard of hell.
Actually, the Dope is the station where you board the bus to hell. 
The handbaskets are an extra fee, of course.
Somewhere I’ve still got my souvenir “charter member” handbasket. I later asked twickster to sign it.