Maybe in the version they’re sending YOU. 
Just for the record, I’m not married.
I was riffing on a line from Mony Pythons Life of Brian, I played the same card in the Coldfire thread earlier today.
I’m not geting married again, though in the interest of efficiency, I am looking to find a woman I truly dislike and buy her a house.
(credit Pat Paulsen.)
Not getting married. (check)
No significant other. (check)
Not even casually dating. (check)
No children. (check)
Not pregnant (check)
Not moving. (check)
Still adjusting to new job. (check)
4 dogs, 2 cats, largely driving me up the wall, tho arguably very cute. (check)
Shall we all wallow together?
I’m not getting married, never been married, have been single again for a few months, no kids, no casual dating or casual sex either despite my best half hearted efforts.
I’m thinking I should start going to the bar wearing the “Hopeless Romantic Seeks Filthy Whore” t shirt, around here that would probably guarantee some action.
Apparently all this wallowing brings out my humorous side.
Hey, me too! Have the T-shirt and everything!
Me neither.
But a small, mean, petty part of me wishes that I could register. Very small, very mean, and very petty.
Shall we wallow at the river
the single solitary river
wallow with nobody else at the river
that flows by something but I can’t really be bothered find out what.
I’m not getting married either, and am not planning on kids.
Haven’t had to buy any presents lately, but i can’t help think it’s weird that everyone else i know has gotten married or is engaged or something.
So where was everyone last night? I vacuumed and everything. I guess the no presents thing must have discouraged you all.
Although outlierrn is evidently a man, I’m not sure why you assumed anyone married to a woman must be.
Hey. . .in a year, you should start an “I’m not celebrating my anniversary” thread!
I’m not getting married and it seems unlikely that I will have a baby, though I’d not mind either. But I am vacationing, starting this weekend, and my pet is highly adorable in person and in photographs. No one in the family is graduating, I am a vocal opponent of weight loss dieting and surgeries, and I have a bothersome tooth.
I will gladly accept “I’m sorry about your tooth” offerings, especially gift certificates for soft foods. Ouch.
Mazel Tov, not-engaged Dopers!
Not only am I not getting married - I didn’t sleep in a Holiday Inn last night!
Well, I didn’t sleep at a Holiday Inn, either. In fact I am boycotting the entire IC Hotel Group Chain.
And I’m not getting married, either. Too much drama.
Just for the record, some of us wallow in our non-aloneness.
Your kind are not welcome here. 
No, it’s just that I thought you were female for the longest time.
I am sorry the heterocentrist USA exists. There were 2,162,000 marriages in 2008. According to this article there were approximately 100,000 official same-sex weddings, civil unions and domestic partnerships in 2008. That’s still 2 million heterosexual marriages, and 20x more heterosexual marriages.
Would it be awesome to have a world where you couldn’t assume gender by marriage? Sure. Does it exist? No.
Whoa! Whoa! Waaaaaaaaaay too serious for this thread. Hey, there’s a new discussion of cattle mutes in MPSIMS. Who’s with me???!