I’ve been in this long distance relationship for quite awhile now, and today I’m picking him up at the airport. He’ll be here for a little over a week, and I’m so nervous; this is the first time we’ve met in person. He plans to move up here soonish, but being adults, we both have things to take care of before that can happen.
The rational side of me knows it’ll be fine. Of course there’s always the chance that we just won’t hit it off in person, for whatever reason, but come on… after this long, we ought to be okay. But theres this other niggling little voice that won’t shut up: “I should have gotten a haircut. Am I too fat? My apartment isn’t clean enough. What about those weird toes?” and I know it’s silly. He knows about my imperfections and we’re still together.
Now, I know y’all couldn’t care less about my jitters, but I need someone to tell me it’ll be fine. Better yet, someone to tell me they’ve been there and it worked out okay for them.
Of COURSE it will be fine! Maybe. Depends on how weird your toes are. That could be a deal breaker.
No, seriously. Your jitters are perfectly normal, and the first time you two lay eyes (and lips) on one another, you’re gonna say to yourself, “What the hell was I so worried about?”
You kids have fun! Guess we won’t be hearing much from you this week!
I am not at all attempting to rain on your parade, but please don’t be so invested in having the relationship work that you ignore your own instincts or your own still small voice. It not uncommonly happens that two people who are great together long-distance are not great together close up, for any number of reasons, from the fact that the indefinable but necessary element of physical attraction is just missing, to the fact that the formerly long-distance person has some personal habit or quirk that just bugs you.
Don’t get me wrong – I wish you the best and hope yours is among the many relationships that started long-distance and worked out fine up-close. There’s even been several of those on the Boards. But I personally made the mistake of ignoring a lot of “he’s not the one for me” signs because I was so completely invested in having a promising relationship work out. It didn’t work out, but only after many months and a lot of tears, and the one lesson I was left with was to not fall so deeply in love with the idea of being in love that I wasn’t being true to myself. So be optimistic, by all means. But listen to yourself.
The toes are a bit weird, yeah, but he’s seen pictures!
I also intend to listen to my instincts about him, but since I can’t do that 'til he gets here, my small voice is mostly concerned about whether he’ll like me.
But, of course there’s always the possibility that things won’t work out. If so, hey! I’ve still got kittens to snuggle.
Or you could end up like Elaine from Seinfeld…dragging him out of bed, shoving him out the door and driving to the airport like a bat outta hell so he won’t miss his flight.
I’m just sayin’…
Relax…barring him having a foot fetish, I think you’ll be fine. Have fun!
8 1/2 years ago I was in the exact same position. So scared and nervous. I picked him up at the bus station. The minute I looked into his eyes all that nervous energy went away.
He stayed for a week, went home for 8 weeks, came back for a week, went home for 3 weeks. I called him May 21st and said “Pack your bags, I’m coming to get you”
We’ve been together for over 8 years after physically knowing eachother for 2 weeks.
Aw, hey I posted pictures of them just a day or so ago, but here ya go: Kitties
Thanks for the well wishes, everyone (and words of warning). We’ve known each other for lil over 2 years, and because of money and work situations, this is the first chance we’ve had to meet. It’s been so long it just feels sort of unreal now.
I think we’d start to have some serious problems if we didn’t meet soon… no physical contact is really getting on my last damn nerve.
