…have gold-leaf toilet paper. That’s right. I wipe my ass with gold."
…can order anything I want.
At Taco Bell.
You wipe your own ass? How gauche! That’s what my body servant is for.
You guys still poop? I’m so rich I have all the unnecessary parts removed from my food before I eat it so I have no need to poop.
"I’m so rich that I…
Don’t need the library anymore - I bought my own book!
Wear my underwear and socks once and then throw them out.
Throw away unopened pistachios
…don’t own a television. When I want to watch an episode of a show, I just have the actors come to my house and perform it for me in my living room.
I have a flock of geese trained to wipe my ass with their necks!
…I wish I had a nickel for every nickel I have.
I’m Rich, but my friends call me Wealthy.
[rimshot]
I’m so rich, my servant’s servant parks his boat in his boat.
You should see *my *boat.
The gas tank was almost empty, so I threw the car away and got a new one.
Regards,
Shodan
I’m so rich that I can afford that $300 juicer instead of just a $250 one.
…give other people heartburn.
I’m so rich that I bought another planet for when this one is used up.
I’m so rich, it actually makes sense for me to be a republican.
…bought buy one get 2 free pants at Target
And only took home the one
I’m so rich I didn’t see why I needed to make choice between them so I bought both.