This is more of a “I need help with a decision” post, so pleace help me.
I´m in a really tight spot.
To begin at the beginning.
Around three months ago I broke up with my girlfriend, which I had been seeing for two years.
Two months later I met a really nice girl which I really love and find extremly nice and all around brilljant.
We have been dating for almost 3 months now and it’s been great.
But then something happened.
A girl I know, started to have boyfriend issues and she started talking to me about it.
I, since I´ve helped a lot of my friends in very similar cases, helped her out and made her reallize how great she was and how he wasn´t the right one for her.
But the thing is, we talked a lot, and while all of this happened, we kinda fell “in love” with each other.
We know how nice and absolutely great the other person is and we are extremly attractive in the eyes of each other.
Sow now my problem is, that I´m in love with 2 wonderful girls, neither of which I wanna hurt.
Normally, this would be heaven for most folk … people have a hard time finding just one wonderful girl, and I have two.
But since you can’t have two girlfriends, I´m in a really tight spot, since I don’t wanna loose either of them.
I started wondering about this with girl number two … and she really did not want me to do anything bad or betray my girlfriend in any way, and I totally aggreed since I don’t wanna hurt my girlfriend in ANY way, I love her so much I can’t bare to imagine me hurting her and be cause to her pain.
So we started wondering what to do. First we decided we couln’t do anything since I had a girlfriend which I loved and didn’t wanna hurt and we were happy with that decision.
But the thing is, we couln’t stop flirting with each other … and wanting to be with one another so we decided that the only thing to do was to end this all and never talk again.
We tried that for a couple of days, but we missed each other terribly. Still, I love my girlfriend and have a wonderful time with her, and none of that was in any way diminnished by this.
I didn’t even know that this could be a spereate feeling, for it to be possible to love two girls at the same time without there being something wrong in either case.
So know we were in a tight spot.
We tried not talking to each other and that didn’t work.
(The thing is … a lot of you will probably say, since you can’t live without her, she’s the one you should be with … but the thing is, if I were to stop seeing my girlfriend I’d miss her just the same as girl nr2.)
So we tried to “stop” flirting and wanting to be with each other and only be friends, but that just didn’t work. Our conversations became boring and stale and we didn’t like it.
We really didn’t want to do anything “bad” since we are both truly good persons and I sure as hell do NOT wanna hurt my girlfriend in ANY way, and I DONT wanna loose her.
But after trying to find options for us to be friends after a week, every day thinging of an option we were finally faced with two options.
stop seeing each other completely
This something we just CAN’T do! It sucked and would eventually destroy my relationship with my girlfriend since I would always be wanting to be with the other girl.
Use the “horrible” “what you don´t know doesn’t hurt you”.
BELIEVE ME, this is NOT something I wan’t to do.
Im my oppinion, cheating is the most ugliest thing in the WORLD … but I´m screwed!! I´m stuck between two wonderful girls, and I can’t stop seeing either of them!!
- I LOVE my girlfriend and I DON’T wanna leave her
- If I stop seeing girl number 2 I will miss her terribly and most probably ruin my relationship with my girlfriend somehow.
- I just CAN’T stop seeing my girlfriend, I will NOT dump her. She’s one of the best thing that has happened to me, but unfortunatly, so is girl nr.2
So what I´m left with is … “what you don’t know wont hurt you”.
BELIEVE ME … I know how unethical this is and what I´m doing and if I were someone else … for example someone like you …just reading this, I would be filled with words and thoughts like (he’s a chicken, he’s still a cheater, why doesn’t he just make a choice) and so on and so on.
Just try for a moment to think how it is to fall completely in love with the two most wonderful girls you’ve ever met at the SAME time! and try to imagine how it is to have to loose one of them.
Most of us know how strong love is … you can’t BEAR the thought of not being with one another … I have this feeling, for BOTH of them.
I would never ever cheat under ANY cirumstances other than this one … most beutiful girl in the world would want to sleep with me while I had a girlfriend … not a chance in hell.
Wouln’t matter how horny I was or anything … I do NOT cheat!!
So what I´m asking you all … PLEACE … if there is ANY other way of going about this, that doesn’t have the only option to never see girl number 2 again … pleace tell me.
And pleace do not flame me. I promise, I´m a good man. The girl number 2 fell in love with me because I am really good to everyone and always try to do the right thing, and that’s why I´m searching for help from you.
Try to put yourself in my position … Imagine you have the worlds two most wonderful girls, both who you love with all your heart (yes ALL Your heart for both of them … didn’t think that was possible, but apparently, it is), and you would have to hurt one of them immensly or never see the other one again
Pleace pleace pleace … I ask you, don’t give me shitty comments or bash me for being a cheater.
I haven’t cheated yet and it’s the LAST thing I’m going to do, but I DONT want to loose either of them and I wont do it!.
The option to be with them both without my girlfriend ever getting hurt (since she won’t know about it) is more appealing than that.
The real thing is, since I can’t share my love physically and socially with girl nr 2. I don’t know which one I want more so I can’t let her just go, since I´d never stop wondering what I missed.
Btw, if I am forced to use the “what you dont know” option it won’t be forever. Just long enough for me to decide which girl I truly want to be with, since I´m not stupid enough to try to be with them both.
But I just CAN NOT make that decision before I know how it is to love girl nr 2 physically and socially and mentally. so do everything with her I do with my girlfriend.
The last thing I will tell you is :
I will probably NOT cheat since it’s such an evil act in my mind, but what I’m trying to accomplish here is for it not EVEN to be a possibillity.
so pleace don’t flame me for a thing I haven’t done yet and probably will not do.
I´m asking you for kind advice.
This CAN happen to all of you … remember that before throwing the first stone.
Thanks to you all for reading this and thanks even more if you will give me good advice.
With great thanks,