I’m presuming it’s not the reality of the situation, but this thought just tickled me.
I think a 10 year old’s idea of a Bridal Shower could be hilarious, cute and wondefully fun for all the adults attending.
When I remarried 10 years ago, I wanted to avoid a lot of the crap associated with huge weddings like $1,200 showers and forcing my friends into $500 dresses they’d only wear once, so I had my nieces (ages 11 and 9) and my daughter (age 5) as my only attendants. My sister quipped, “You can have your shower at McDonald’s Play Place and your Bachelorette Party at Chuck E. Cheese!” 
Just heard back from my friend. She said her sister was so insistent and really, really wanted to throw her one that she felt she had to agree. But she (bride) thinks it’s silly since she doesn’t need anything. Her finace said to tell everyone that he is the one who is greedy and wants the gifts. (She says it jokingly but I have my suspicions.)
I did ask her–subtley, of course–about the guest list but she hasn’t answered. So still not sure why the list is so high (though my guess is that future MIL had a lot to do with it, from what I hear. Of course, she should offer to pay for part of the shower if she’s going to add on so many people, but that’s just IMHO.)
Thanks for at least making us feel vindicated that we are not being unreasonable about this. It’s ridiculous, but I also don’t want to ruin my friend’s day so I don’t think I can not pay. I am going to hope that most people don’t come, though. Maybe I can get hold of the list and talk them out of it? :dubious: