You can do it, Scott. It looks like AA worked for you before, you can do it again.
I had a close family member go through this. You can e-mail me if you like.
You’ve already done the hard part, admitting you have a problem. We’re here if you need us.
Congratulations, Peter. You don’t know me either, but I am an alcoholic too. Sober now for 14 years. You know you can do this, and you know one day soon you’ll feel normal again! Drink lots of water, and get out and walk a little. Purge the poison.
We’re all pulling for you! E-mail me any time…
I would like to congratulate you on taking this step. Not only is it difficult to admit you have a problem, but making others aware is not only difficult but frightening. As you said, it is about humility.
Several relatives of mine have drunk themselves to death, literally. It was very sad to watch. My father had a severe drinking problem as I was growing up. Despite begging him to seek help, he refused and said there was no problem. It was not until I did and said some really stupid things did he take me seriously how much damage he was doing himself and to those around him. Long painful story short, he did stop… with difficulty, but he stopped.
I pray you the same.
Please take care of yourself and take comfort in knowing there are so many of us here who care and hope the best for your recovery.
Take care of yourself, man. You’re only going to be making your life better by kicking this. You succeeded before, and certainly can do so again. Sure, the Dopers know now, but we’re not the condemning types; we’re cheering for you to feel better and take control of your life again - and having a cheering section is pretty neat. 
As you can see, you have lots of people here who love you too.
You’re humble and that’s a good thing. I just want you to know that I amazed at your strength. You are admitting your powerlessness, which I wish everyone had the guts to do… You are inspirational, scott!
My mother is a recovering alcoholic, 11 years sober. She still attends meetings at least three times per week… AA is family to her.
One day at a time. Keep coming back.
Scott, I have been thinking of you since reading your post last night. I somehow knew what the problem would be before I opened the thread, so I wanted to respond that I’m someone else who understands, and who will include you in her prayers.
Scott/Peter–
Way to go! Seems like the first step is always the toughest, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t a lot more difficult steps along the way. I’m an alcoholic too, and I’ve been sober for 20 years next month.
Email me any time you need a leg up or an encouraging word! crazy4chaucer@ev1.net.
((((hugs))))
Faith
{{{{{{{{{Peter}}}}}}}}}
Now you’ve got me crying at my desk. Please feel free to e-mail me if you need to talk or need support - e-mail’s in my profile.
i am also one who had a parent who thought everyone else had a problem with his drinking. for sure HE didn’t have a problem.
this is why i’m so happy to see that you know there is a problem, and reach out for help. what happened to my father will not happen to you. you will not die alone in a hospital with no one around you. your family finding out about it when an obituary is mailed with the words, “is this your james??”
keep reaching out. there are many hands ready and willing to help pull you to safety.
print out this thread and read it when things get bad and the compulsion is clawing.
This very eloquent part of ultress’ post made me think of my favorite poem, Desiderata. Although it isn’t an AA specific poem I think it’s worth a read, Scott/Peter. Especially this part:
I have already posted earlier but I thought you should read this. I continue to keep you in my positive thoughts.
You know you’re not just a cutie patooty with an evil bunny. You are also an imperfect human just like the rest of us. A imperfect human who is still worthy of love and the effort it takes to achieve sobriety
I am an RN working on a detox floor but I am also an adult child of alcoholics with alcoholic siblings as well. I have had a problem with substance abuse in the past as well.
I have been to many Al-Anon meetings and spent many nights alternating between being filled with self loathing and swearing “this will never happen again” and beating myself up when it did. Sobriety is hard but drinking and drugging is harder.
Work the steps and the steps will work. E mail me anytime. I will be sending you positive vibes. Now you get out there and kick ass.
It’s wonderful. 
Thank you.
Great!
Good show, scott. Best of luck on your road to a better life!
Out of curiosity, a general type of question. Are there any ex-alcoholics that managed to just “cut back”, instead of quiting altogether? The only alcoholic I’ve ever known never stopped drinking, so I have very little experience with this, but the overwhelming majority I’ve read about over here seems to be of the “one drink after 5 years of sobriety, and you’re an acoholic again” persuasion.
No offense intended, just trying to learn something here.
I quit entirely a little more than two years ago.
Occasionally I’ll drink O’Douhl’s (sp) non-alcoholic beer.
I also had one beer when I hiked out of the Grand Canyon. That was the conclusion of a four day trek, and I had a beer to cool off/celebrate. I knew I was not going to want more than that. I know myself well enough. If I suspected that a single beer would trigger a renewed, persistant craving pattern, I wouldn’t have drunk it.
I don’t attempt daily moderate drinking though. I think the temptation to revert to old ways would be too great. I simply don’t drink.
Coldfire, I can only answer your question based on my own experience.
It started again because I took a year off work and spent a summer with a pothead boyfriend. I didn’t drink, and the pot itself didn’t screw me up (I tell myself that now; ask me in a couple of months). What screwed me up was when my stash ran out, my boyfriend couldn’t get a hold of his dealer, and I needed a buzz of some sort. I bought two - two - bottles of malt-liquor-based lemonade drink.
Then it just started all over again. I had to hide it from my roommate at the time, then I moved out on my own, and could drink openly in front of the TV, at the computer, wherever, whatever - and stash my empties in the open, not hidden in my bedroom closet.
It’s a progressive disease, and it got worse, obviously, and the past year of my life has been unmanageable.
I don’t know what came over me Sunday night (actually, the guy I called said it was more like 1 AM - LOL - I thought it was around 10 PM) but I picked up the phone. I suddenly went from having the simple desire to stop drinking (AA Tradition #3 - the only requirement for membership) to being given the so-called gift of desperation and absolute humility. Hence my post Monday morning.
And I’ve now been blessed with another day of happy sobriety. I’ll worry about tomorrow when it comes. That’s how it works.
I don’t know whether or not moderate drinking is possible for someone who has a history of overdoing it. I only know that I don’t need to drink any more and haven’t for a long time now, so why take the chance?
We have a poster whose name I can’t remember who decided that he, or she, would set a daily limit and stick to it. I don’t know how that turned out - unless it was the original poster.
In my opinion that is a poor method because the thought of drinking is then on your mind and the expectation of being able to have drinks up to the limit is always there. It keeps alcohol as an important part of living and a reward sort of thing. If you have had problems that is a really tough burden to overcome.
I do know that I decided many times to cut down smoking to some fixed number of cigarettes per day and that was useless. After I got bronchial pneumonia and coughed up blood twice in about three months it was relatively easy to quit cold-turkey. If those of us with compulsive personalities get good and scared we finally can see the light, I guess.
Hey, Peter/Scott:
By now, I can only echo what everyone else has already said. Just know that there’s yet another Doper pulling for you.
–Viva
I can attest to that! It’s cold turkey, or nothing when it comes to smoking. BUT, I think that the “threshold” for cigarettes is lower, i.e. they’re physically addicitive a lot sooner than alcohol. If I drink 2 beers a night (which is a fair estimate), it doesn’t make my body crave for alcohol when I don’t drink for a couple of days (which also happens). So, either the threshold for physical addiction to alcohol is higher, or the addiction is mainly psychological in its nature (the aforementioned addictive personalities), or perhaps even both.
In any case, thanks for your frank answers, guys.
I can’t offer advice, because I’ve never been there, but I can offer support and encouragement.
Also, I want to let you know I admire you for letting us know. It must have been difficult for you. As you said, it’s about humility. Rest assured, you won’t be humiliated here.
If you’re still planning on coming to New York in January, I’d be pleased to meet you and tell you to your face that I admire you and wish you the best.
Hang in there, pal.