As a rule, I never even figure out that a person is interested until they actually jump into bed with me. . .
Yep. I’m as bad as Melatonin. A woman could be on her knees, unzipping my trousers and unwrapping an Altoid and still I’d wonder what my chances are…
Livin’ on Tums, vitamin E and Rogaine
Oh my gosh, I am so glad I am not alone. I am utterly oblivious! And sometimes, I have to confess, when I discover that someone is interested/has been flirting, my first reaction is “What? Are they blind?”
There was this one incident years ago where I was visiting my mom out-of-town for a few weeks. I went to church prayer service with her, but it was not a “dress up” affair - I had no make-up, if you looked closely under my aged, baggy cullottes, my legs had not been shaved. In other words, I was NOT lookin’ good. So when a rather attractive young man seemed interested (my mom could tell) I was utterly clueless. Why should I think he noticed me? I did everything in my power to look like shit! Ah well.
As far as I’m aware, I have never been flirted with. I hope, therefore, that I’m part of this crowd, and not as pathetic as I fear.
-PIGEONMAN-
Returns!
The Legend Of PigeonMan - By Popular Demand! Enjoy, enjoy!
I am the biggest flirt(when appropriate). I think it is so much fun. Guys usually know I am flirting, I am somewhat quiet and reserved(somewhat, until the wine takes over), so if I am flirting with you, it should be relatively obvious. And I love when my SO flirts with other women. May seem strange, but I think it is sexy, just innocent but fun flirting. Very exciting.
If your head is wax, don’t walk in the sun.
-Benjamin Franklin
The REAL reason why nice guys can’t get laid!
I wont make a me too post.
Me three!
See I said I wouldnt and I didnt.
My fiancee and I met after I avoided a different girl for weeks and kept running into her. Didnt hit me until she said “take me here and now” that she might even like me.
Oh well its a story to tell our kids someday.
Yep, same here. I am completely clueless when it comes to flirtation. It’s mostly because of my stunted social development, I guess. I spent so many years of my adolescence being a gawky geeky ugly duckling type that when I started to grow into something more attractive, I had no idea what to do. Let me share with you an interesting little incident that happened to me in high school:
This was shortly after I finally came out of the closet to my classmates. As you might expect, there was a lot of weirdness going on, which also may have had something to do with it. In the midst of all this, I keep catching this one girl staring at me. Every time I caught her eye, she smiled. Okaaay… So, one day, I’m in the library, and she suddenly comes out of nowhere and starts talking to me. “Hi, what’s your name, what classes are you taking, etc.” Well, being completely unused to ANYBODY talking to me, ever, I basically backed away from her with a terrified expression on my face. One of her friends pulled her away. “Leave her alone. You’re scaring her.” I continued to catch her eye frequently after that, but I figured she had just been being friendly, a sort of “Hey, why don’t I make the unpopular girl feel wanted” gesture or something. That would have been the end of it, had it not been for something that happened a few weeks later.
I was walking to my car after school, when I notice that my car door is open. As I stopped dead in my tracks, trying to figure out why in the name of Uncle John’s trousers my door should be open, someone got out. It was her. She got out, closed the door, and walked away, never noticing me standing there. I gave my car a quick inspection. Nothing was missing, not that there was anything of value in there, but it did appear that there had been some rummaging through of stuff. Well, I did not know what to make of this at all. I considered notifying campus security, but I figured “why bother?” So, I just filed the incident away for future reference. After a while, I guess she lost interest in me and began pursuing someone a little less clueless.
During this whole thing, it never once occured to me that she might be attracted to me. Similarly, it never once occured to me that I should probably be very frightened of her behavior. None of this entered my mind until I was recounting this incident to a friend, and she said “She probably wanted to go out with you.” “Naaahh!”, I laughed it off. But then I thought “What if…” What would I have done if I realized? I don’t know. It definitely was a learning experience, and if anybody did the same thing today, I’d probably get the hint. That would be about what it would take, though.
I am a major flirt…doesn’t mean I wanna do ya. Just means I like ya and think you are fun to tease. I am never serious about this stuff. Just like making people smile.
I really try to be good but it just isn’t in my nature!
I’ll try this for the third time and see if I can condense it before AOL dumps me off…
Social radar. Genetic coding. Missed signals cause pain and confusion. Coaching no help.
Pop psych no help. Not gender linked. Klunkiness not chosen. Envy and admire natural flirts. Haven’t found cure.
Dumping AOL ASAP,
Veb
It’s been my experience that:
- All men are clueless.
- When in doubt, see rule number 1.
I was voted biggest flirt of high school sr. class. Hey, it’s not “Most Likely to Succeed”, but it’s something! The wife says I’m shameless, I still don’t see it. I’ve gotten more than one free hair cut, for example, where I thought the stylist was just being nice. Wifey clued me later, when she wanted to go kick her ass. I’ve been asked to countless movies. And, finally, to use a phrase that my wife and I say to each other now… “black chicks dig me”! I must do something or act in some way that black women think I’d be a hell of a lot of fun to be around.
Hey, I can’t help it, I’m just a flirty type of guy, I guess.
Enright3
I used to have a lapel button that said: “I am shy, nearsighted, and hard of hearing. PLEASE FLIRT AGGRESSIVELY.” And sometimes, it actually worked!
On a related note, do you know how to recognize an extroverted computer programmer? He stares at your shoes when he talks to you.
Corrupting innocent bytes since 1999.
I couldn’t catch a pass if it were a baseball and I had a mitt. =:^(
God, I can so “me three” this.
I do really bad thinking I’m getting signals when it’s just women being nice. Couple anecdotes:
I went to eat dinner in a busy restaurant by myself on a Friday night. (Is that wearing a big sign or what?) The waitress is polite and friendly and talkative, and wanders back to check on me, but pauses to continue talking. We discuss a few things, like the fact her dad and I work for the same company (different divisions). I’m thinking she could be interested. I finally work up the nerve to ask her out, and get a very embarrassed look back. She has a boyfriend. Doh.
I went to a bookstore for an event I helped organize. I had to talk to a staff member, and met a certain woman. She was cute. She was very helpful. Even after the official contact showed up, she still talked to me and made sure things were okay. I waited around until we finished up and cleaned up and just as I was ready to go, I sauntered (well, attempted to saunter) up to her to ask her out. She showed me her wedding ring. Cough cough!
I already mentioned in another thread the girl whom I ate breakfast with twice a week but didn’t ask out because I thought she was seeing a buddy of mine.
I’ve got no clue when I’m getting hit on. I mistake polite and friendly behavior for interest. And I probably miss out on a lot by not picking up those subtle clues. Let me tell you, subtlty does NOT work on my family.
One lady at work once told me there were at least 4 women there who were strongly attracted to me, but would not give me a clue who. (I think she said they were all older.)
The sad part is if a woman did come up and throw herself at me, I probably wouldn’t believe her.
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- I knew this chick who would walk by me while staring, often several times a day. Usually she’d say something dirty, or make rude hand gestures. I really had no idea how to respond at all. Then one day, some cops show up, tell me to take my tent and get outta her f****** yard. - MC
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I’ve taken an entirely different tack, I believe.
Most of the time I think women are flirting with me. 'Cause of a couple of embarrassing situations when I was younger where I got shut down completely, I’ve come to question my own ability to determine whether a woman is flirting with me.
Even if a woman is aggressively flirting with me, I deny it to myself just as aggressively.
GBS had to take a two-by-four to the back of my head before the picture cleared up in my head.
You are now leaving a “Smiley-free zone”!
A public service message brought to you by G.R.O.S.S.
I’m a minor flirt and very harmless but if someone is flirting with me, I am clueless and generally the shyness kicks in if I figure it out. We have this electrician at work who everyone says flirts with me just because he drops in and says hello when he is around our school. I dont see it at all. He’s an all around friendly kind of guy.
I kept hearing about this phenomenon, you know, overt heterosexual interest on the part of women. Wondered if I’d ever see it in person.
Yeah…oblivious. Don’t receive on that channel somehow. In order to flirt I have to run a personal ad or reply to one so we know we’re flirting to begin with.
Designated Optional Signature at Bottom of Post
I was voted class flirt all four years of high school.
That was 13 years ago. Now I’m married and I blush when a guy flirts with me. When I’ve had a few beers I’ll flirt with friends, but I’ve lost most of my skills.
I jumped on my husband with both feet and select other body parts. Otherwise, he wouldn’t have known I was flirting. Women flirt with him now and I have to point it out to him.
Classic moment: We have two other couples over for dinner and are watching TV afterwards. Some kind of “Entertainment Tonight” show is on and the female host is interviewing Mel Gibson. All three of the women in our house ::gasp:: because Mel is flirting, albeit subtly, with the host. They’re both on a couch and Mel is leaning toward her when he responds to questions, his entire body turned toward her, his arm lying on the back of the couch, reaching toward her. (My GAWD that man is F-I-N-E!) The wives knew it. The husbands thought we were nuts.
Mel Gibson can come over to my house anytime. ::drool::
Coldfire walks in. He is carrying a gigantic neon sign. He mounts the sign on the wall and plugs it in. The sign reads:
" MOOSIEGIRL !! HIYA BUTTERCAKES 
"
Seriously, I tend to pick up the signs pretty well. But that’s mainly because I’m somewhat of a flirt myself
Coldfire
“You know how complex women are”
- Neil Peart, Rush (1993)