Well… my husband and I were a pretty tight unit. And like I’ve also said, I’m ethnically Jewish, not religiously Jewish. My married name is hyphenated and the “maiden name” half is pretty stereotypically Jewish so it’s not like my existence was hidden or anything, but Jews aren’t pushy about these things and there are quite a few “halfbreeds” around. “Oh, is that your name? Are you Jewish?” “Half Jewish, my dad’s side”. Occasionally the local community is mentioned but it really always has been a case of “you’re welcome to come visit, but it’s OK if you’re not interested. Have a good day!”
Yes. It’s so refreshing not to have to either not mention my beliefs, or to have to defend my beliefs.
When mumbling about getting a social life I’ve often heard “Join a church!”. Maybe I’ll join the local synagogue instead, they seem much less pushy about things.
Jews don’t seek converts and they really don’t want you to convert unless you are truly driven to do so.
If you are surrounded by orthodox Jews all the time, how do you not know that they NEVER would try to convert you. You make it sound like that’s even a possibility.
Agreed! You may be a halvsie, but you’re still a member of the Tribe. Go and enjoy!
Seconded!
Wrong. Jews don’t think the fact that you don’t share our faith is a problem at all. Don’t apply your goyish assumptions to us, boychik.
This applies to non-Jews. On the other hand, the Lubavitch branch of Hassidic Jews aggressively recruits fellow Jews to join their sect (I have an unpleasant memory of being confronted on a Manhattan street as a teenager by a Lubavitcher demanding to know if I was a Jew and attempting to convince me to enter his group’s van for some sort of hardcore proselytizing (I managed to escape).
They have a reputation of being as annoying as Mormon missionaries, though only to other Jews.
The Orthodox for the most part believe that the messiah cannot come until all Jews are faithful to all of God’s 613 commandments. Converting non-Jews to Judaism who are not committed to following the commandments therefore pushes out the arrival of the messiah. Converting non-Jewish women to Judaism also makes any future children Jewish, too.
Where do you people live that you get all these pushy-Christians around? I swear I never encounter anything more aggressive than your average, “God bless you” or something like that. I think I’ve seen ONE track in my lifetime, in a Kmart bathroom.
I was in Charlotte NC once and the local paper had a column asking the natives not to be so loud about the “God loves you” and “Jesus loves you” stuff since they were scaring the tourists. It was all done politely, not obnoxiously, but still …
Back in the '30s my aunt married a gentile. My grandfather had no problem with it - since my uncle was a Dodgers fan, and that counted far more than religion.
My mother was a Giants fan, and that was a totally different story.
I also think that a certain category of Christian views converting non-Christians (whether Jewish, Pagan, atheist, or something else) as Extra Special Brownie Points.
If you seem to be “normal” white and Christian they probably won’t bother with you because they assume you’re already in the fold.
As a “halfbreed” some of them seem to think I’m in extra special need of rescue. I’ve also met a few who WON’T accept me - either I have to go to Jews for Jesus or be Jewish because Jews are “special” (frankly, I do not follow their reasoning so I’m not entirely sure what’s going on in their heads). Some kind of weird “one drop” rule regarding Jewish heritage vs. being white. Then there was the one nutball who insisted on speaking to me in Hebrew and seemed incapable of understanding that no, the language is not installed at birth or in the genes or something.
Not all Christians are pushy in that manner. Quite a few are live and let live. But the hard-sell proselytizers do certainly exist.
Yeah, it’s tough for a lot of Christians, and people in Christian-influenced cultures, to understand that many religions (including Jews) don’t proselytize. The prevailing attitude of Jews is, more or less, “Why would you want to be one of us? The only thing that sets us apart is that we have to follow more rules.”. At most, some sects will try to “convert” ethnic Jews into following the religious side of their heritage as well… but to those sects, Broomstick (who’s Jewish on her father’s side) wouldn’t be considered Jewish at all, and so even they still wouldn’t pressure her.
Reform Judaism got rid of the matrilineality thing decades ago. As someone who raised way to the left of even the Reform movement, I say you’re making a distinction without a difference. There are no false pretenses here.
So howdy, cousin. Enjoy the company of your extended family and don’t sweat about expectations. Just do what’s comfortable. If you get the inclination to learn a little bit about it all, they’ll be there for that. If you just want to show up every now and then for friendly company and a little nosh, they’ll still be there.
I’ve had some experiences along these lines. I was raised (Reform) Jewish and both sides of my family are Jewish as far back as anyone knows, but haven’t been remotely observant since, oh, middle school.
In college, I was walking down the street with a Puerto Rican friend, speaking Spanish, and the Lubavitchers stopped me and asked if I was Jewish (it was around Sukkot, I think, and they were trying to convince me to get up on the Mitzvah Tank and say a prayer or something with them. My response? “What do you mean by Jewish?” They laughed and said I had to be Jewish, because who else would answer a question with a question?
Anyway, I told them thanks but no thanks. They pressed the point a little bit, which is how I discovered how to make a teenage Orthodox guy REALLY nervous and sheepish - just be a 19-year-old girl in jeans and a T-shirt, and look him hard in the eye and smile.
Long story short - some evangelicals believe that Jews (specifically Israeli Jews) will have a part to play in the Second Coming. If all the Jews get converted, Jesus won’t come back.
I doubt that what expected you in the van was “hardcore proselytizing”. You probably encountered one of the “Mitzva Tanks” and what awaited you inside at most was putting on a tefillin.
This is pretty much my experience. I’m supposed to be a Lutheran (baptized, but haven’t set foot in a Lutheran church in 25 years) and the worst I’ve gotten is, “Ohhh, ok”, and a disappointed look.
I did go to a Catholic ceremony for promoting a priest to a bishop and it was quite interesting from an anthropological standpoint. Mr. H is also a lapsed Catholic, but all that remains is the guilt and a vague sense that abortion’s wrong. I’ve done a pretty good job on that, though, and turned him into a feminist.