InfoMania. Why Didn't Someone Tell Me Earlier? A Fable.

Lo, in the Beginning there was chaos and and the world was without form and insanity lay heavy over the land and its names were as Jerry Springer and Sally Jessy Raphaël and Phil Donahue and Montel Williams.

And those who were at E! responded saying, we got to get ourselves a piece of that action, and so was formed Talk Soup in the year 1991 C.E. (Cable Era). And from the lowest mud they plucked a Nugget of shiniest gold and his name was Greg Kinnear. And it was Good.

Then the Kinnear was lured by the False Rewards of Tinseltown and he departed, fated to never win an Oscar for his apostasy, but he begat John Henson, and Henson begat Ned Sparks, and Sparks begat Aisha Tyler, at whose Feet we shall always Prostrate ourselves, Hoping that she is wearing a skirt.

And, Lo, each was seduced by the False Rewards of Tinseltown and left Talk Soup, which by 2002 was a Shell of Itself because all the good crazy had been canceled.

And Talk Soup left the air and chaos returned in the form of reality shows and celebutainment. And in the lands of Mockery and Snarkery a rival didst emerge from the void known as VH1 and its name was Best Week Ever and it didst prosper because the crazy was thick on the ground.

Those who were at E!, a different group because they come and go as the wind, said, hey, that’s Our schtick, and begat The What The? Awards. The Hell? asked the Powers That Were Temporarily at E! That’s too stupid even for us. Don’t we still own Rights to Talk Soup? We cannotst call it that, because all the crazy talk shows are gone, sayeth those trapped in that Endless meeting. Come up with a Better Name, commanded the Powers That Were Temporarily at E!. And they could not, but all were Tired and wanted to go Home to their families and mistresses and settled on The Soup.

And, Lo, The Soup begat Joel McHale. And it was Good. The crazy was thick on the ground and both could thereby Prosper.

But The Soup was superior in all ways and those who were at VH1 grew dark and Jealously beset their frames. Make the show more like The Soup, they commanded. How, came the response echoing through the void? Use one Host and not a pack of comics, you Pinheads. That ist, isist, isst, am the Secret.

And, Lo, the program became Best Week Ever with Paul F. Tompkins and laid a Mighty egg, and has been taken off the air, purportedly to return next year, but Hah, who believes that?

And those that were at E! were Pleased with their accomplishments and sayeth, Hey, we’ve got a franchise here, let’s run it into the ground. And so The Soup begat Web Soup, and Sports Soup, and for the girl-children amongst you, The Dish, though it shall be Whispered in the privacy of Manly hangouts that The Dish is funnier than Sports Soup. And it was often Good.

Still, the crazy lay thick on the ground and portions of the Good Stuff had not yet been Mined. And so from a distant outpost came Rumours of a rival. Not Fleetwood Mac, but InfoMania.

And Lo, those that are at Current TV, which was begat by Al Gore in 2005 as a Means of Nobility, and Besides it didn’t keep to Regular Schedules and showed short videos sent in by viewers, and it played InfoMania in three-minute clips sometimes, who knows when, and who wants that crap when Best Week Ever is rerun 20 times a weekend and easily found by your DVR? So no one watches Current TV. No One. It is a hollow echo in the void.

So The Powers That Were Temporarily at Current TV whacked some heads, sayingeth, Get a Clue, and lengthened InfoMania into a regularly scheduled, much repeated, half-hour show. And they have plucked Conor Knighton as Host and he is better than anyone except possibly Joel McHale and the segments are longer, yet funnier, than on the Horde of Soups and why didn’tst somebody tell me about this show earlier?

And now that I have found InfoMania, it is Good. And so I Spread the word to my listeners and Hope for a legion of followers and even do Repent for my earlier crass Aisha Tyler joke because my eyes have been Enlightened by the sarcastic commentary on the sexism that is Rampant in the land by Sarah Haskins in the Target:Women segment. (Aisha. Call me. It will be Good.)

InfoMania. Every Thursday 10PM ET/ 7PM PT on Current TV. Rerun on Saturday a Bunch of Times. Probably rerun every other day of the week too. Good stuff. Yes, it’s opposite Tosh.0 (which is very much like Web Soup). That’s OK but not as Good as either one. And they’re both rerun a zillion times. That’s what your Cable Guide is for.

Hear Me, ye small yet numerous. My words should be heeded. Just what we needed. More TV that comments on other TV. And thus the world shall end, but we shall not even notice, for we Have the Remote and it is Good.

Well done. The DVR is set.