Exactly 72 hours from the time of this post, shall be the cutoff time for final recipes sets to be posted. Then the panelists shall judge!
We shall see who reigns supreme!
Well, Otah, I am beginning to think I really stepped in it. Mike G will prove to be a most worthy challenge for me. I will do my best. Now where’s my spike club?
Chairman Scylla, I will accept this challenge and urge my fellow Iron Chefs to do so as well, but a clarification is needed: Are we only to present ONE (1) dish, as sniglet suggested that best articulates the flavor, texture and color of this ingredient? Or are we to present a menu of 3-4 dishes, as in other Iron Chef battles?
With such a superb ingredient as Live Suckling Pigs, the range of possiblities are tremendous!
Iron Chef Fenris
Iron Chef Fenris By all means do not restrain or limit yourself to one recipe, submit the same 3-4 as the other chefs. That would only be fair, yes?
Iron Chef Fenris races to the podium, far in advance of his competition, and selects 2 of the best of the litter.
Charging back to his kitchen, he calls for Sous-chef Shiva (how appropriate, given the name!), to hold down one of the pigs. He turns to PETA inspector Stoidela and says “You may not care to watch this. Or, if you are recording this for a anti-porcine cruelty video, be sure to get my good side”. 
With that, Iron Chef Fenris takes a meat-mallet (used to flatten chicken and veal chops) and…
with a sharp blow…
instantly and painlessly dispatches the porcine luncheon-to-be.
Quickly, he plunges the now-deceased pig into boiling water, allows it to be boiled for a moment or two and instantly puts the entire pig in a
cold tub of milk and champaigne (“To remove the unwanted piggy odor”)
At this point, he repeats the proceedure for the other piglet and, with the requested clarification from Chairman Scylla (“I have learned” says Iron Chef Fenris “In my many years of cooking and posting, to use the technique of refreshing the topic, before posting!”
“Since it’s the dead of winter, and we long for spring to come, AND since young suckling pigs represent birth and growth and times of change, intend for my dishes to remind the panel of Spring too.”
Iron Chef Fenris begins to cook.
Fenris
In an attempt to be more faithful to the show, I would seek to change the scoring.
A possible 20 points are available per contestant.
10 points are awarded for taste.
5 points are awarded for presentation.
5 points are awarded for creativity.
I would ask our five panelists to judge the recipes based on this, more correct criteria, and disregard the previous, erroneous, 30 point method I had described.
Secondly, recipes are not to be judged individually, but as a whole. One must take the Chef’s entire presentation of his complete meal into consideration. So, each chef will receive one score, 0-20 from each of the five panelists who will have to study the the final recipe posts with great care.
I would suggest that each chef label his final post to be judged with the header “Final Recipes.” Once the deadline has passed, the panelists may present their scores.
Comments, inanities, and such are welcome throughout the process.
I think that clears everything up.
By the way, Unofficial Iron Chef FAQ Here.
Take it, big guy!
Chefs are flying around everywhere as Kitchen Stadium witnesses it’s first “Four on the Floor” battle! In the pineapple battle, challenger JavaMaiden says that though her specialty may lie in desserts, the sweet flavor of the pineapple is one she’s familiar with and has a variety of dishes planned to please the palate!
But not to be upstaged, Iron Chef Zenster said such cockiness is typical of traditionalists who have let their cooking techniques go stale and Java better be prepared to be put in her culinary place.
Meanwhile, Battle Jalapeno has proved a challenge for both chefs, who have taken to preparing their dishes in rubber gloves to prevent third degree burns from the jalapeno’s deadly juice, which the Chinese like to drink as a delicacy! But challenger Opengrave is recieving the cheers of his army of followers in the royal box, waving tail pipes in the air! But the Iron Chef says he isn’t worried and has already pulled out his proven combination of cheese and garlic for use in several dishes!
Battle Suckling Pig and Battle Halibut drew cantankorous protesters from the SPCA and PETA, only to find themselves sacked by Chairman Scylla’s armed Swiss Guard! Despite early misgivings, challenger ellykat has already successfully killed two live halibut with an eggplant and appears well under way! Iron Chef MikeG (who for some reason always carries a gong with him) has brought only the finest whoop-ass, cultivated in the fields of bangladesh and harvested during the summer solstice for use in all his dishes, preparing to “whoop the taste buds off the judges’ tongues!”
Back to you!
[aside]Damn… the real-life Otah better make a fortune for this![/aside]
::: a flurry of sous chefs gather items such as avocados, onions, and honey :::
I start by bringing back about a dozen pineapples, and splitting several in half, perfectly, and having a sous chef scoop out the meat.
::: my sauté pan flames as I toss pineapple, other items, and some brandy on the stove :::
I know the battle is already raging here in Kitchen Stadium, but if you’d put down the bell pepper for a minute, Scylla-san, could I possibly be a silent but annoying cameraman?
This is so much fun I’d love tripping up the chefs with power cords, stuffing the camera lens into pots of simmering innards, etc. Please, please?
Veb
Veb:
Of course!
Tazma-Kazuki, legendary karaoke superstar, known throughout the Pacific Rim for her show stopping rendition of Limp Bizkit’s “Nookie”, leans back in her chair, cracks open a Sapporo and, with a grateful sigh, digs into a package of Pemmican Beef Jerky.
:::: hee hee hee… Mmm, I can’t wait to taste this! Hee hee hee:::::::
Pardon me, but the incomparable Mike G wishes me to make It cleat to Snenc that he never carries his own gong.
Honorable Mike-san also wishes all to note that he is busy at work and can’t be bothered by that silly otah right now-these damn halibuts are heavy?!!
bows and leaves
From my vantage point, I cant tell…
Are these the suckling pigs with the little pop-up thermometers in 'em?
I was offering myself up as a cantidate for Iron Chef French.
Works for me.
Zenster waits patiently for Chairman Scylla to finish enumerating the special ingredients.
His acolytes slowly unpack the massive teak chest to reveal racks of ceramic spice bottles and gleaming blades of all sizes.
Zenster dons his jacket and toque and reaches for a pineapple. He plucks a leaf or two from the center of the crown to test for ripeness and carefully inspects the body of the fruit. He singles out a couple of the large specimens and instructs his assistants in the proper method of preparation.
After selecting a number of the largest Jalapeños he begins to fabricate the first of many courses.
The flurry of sharp edges and minced ingredients ensues with many curt orders and the muttered epithets, the hot pans and the chopping and the hey, hey, hey and the dicing and the pain and the agony… glaven.
AAAAAAEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!! <clawing at her eyes, Stoidela runs in circles around Kitchen Stadium> The Horror! The Horror! Not sweet leetle peegies!! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! <stops, sniffs, saunters over to the Iron Chef working furiously> Say, you wouldn’t have an extra slice of that bacon, would you? Bacon’s my favorite…thanks! Mmm <goes back to her seat, licks her fingers>
Killing those giant halibut has awakened a primal urge in me. My dishes will represent my reconnection with my elders’ cooking techniques as my ancestors guide my hand. I felt their presence as I lifted the 60 lb. monster over my 5 foot, 7 month pregnant frame and screamed like a cavewoman. Look out, MikeG-san; I am now one with the spirit of my ancestors. I will be silent now, and work.
What’s that, Otah? Yes, it does look like a dessert dish I am working on, doesn’t it? Heeeee
I am currently away from Kitchen Stadium working on a batch of chicken soup for my poor sick virtual wife wyldelf.
(its not all fun and lemongrass oil massages)
Fear Not!!
I am preparing mighty dishes that will dazzle you and astound my foes!!
Chairman Scylla, are we to produce actual recipes with amounts and cooking instructions, or are we simply to describe our creations for the panel?
*Iron Chef Creole gathers an enormous basket of jalapenos and brings them back to his station, setting two dozen of them in a stovetop smoker over smoldering mesquite sawdust moistened with tequila. Coating his hands with olive oil (which prevents the capsaicin-laced oils of the peppers from adhering and also is good for the skin), IC Creole deftly skewers several peppers on bamboo skewers and directs a sous-chef to roast them with a blowtorch until the jalapenos’ skins are black and blistered.
In a saucepan, IC Creole heats sugar and water until the sugar is dissolved, then adds several handfuls of whole cranberries and some minced jalapenos.
Meanwhile he has placed several chicken breasts onto a hibachi along with several ears of corn to grill, and is now trimming the fat and silver skin from some pork tenderloins. What will he do next? Stay tuned to Iron Chef!