A very, very, nasty brick.
This implies that more efficient toilets would have us assuming more of an all-fours posture? What would that do to the paper industry?
Q: What’s the difference between a saloon and an elephant fart?
A: A saloon is a bar room. An elephant fart is a ba-room!
The ideal toilet has us more in the squat position, like those older ones you find in mediterranean countries that are just a hole in the floor. The problem is the gluteus maximus, which hides the orfice and constricts the travel path. Most quadrupeds lack the obstructing musculature.
Ever see the picture of “Shrek”, the sheep that was lost for several years in New Zealand? He looked like a giant round furball. I believe the evolutionary gotcha we’ve bred into them is that they don’t shed seasonally so they build up obstructive amounts of wool.
Do you have a link?
Fixed it for ya. 
This is twice today I’ve got to quote the excellent
‘Facts On Farts’.
“A carnivore’s protein-rich diet produces relatively small amounts of intensely stinky gas because proteins contain lots of sulfur. A dog’s or cat’s farts are rarely audible, but the odor is overwhelming. I have asked biologists why dogs and cats generally fart silently, and their theories include: (1) the amount of gas produced is small, but potent, (2) the horizontal orientation of their gastrointestinal system puts less pressure on the anal opening, so the gas is expelled more slowly, (3) their anal sphincters don’t close as tightly as humans’ because it takes less force to hold in the contents of the colon – again because of the horizontal orientation of the gastrointestinal system – and a loose anus makes less sound, and, my favorite (4) dogs and cats don’t feel embarrassed about farting, so their sphincters are more relaxed, leading to less noisy flatulence. My vet tells me that if a cat farts audibly, it could be a sign of pathology”.
One of my beagles woke herself up farting. It was hilarious!
Our Doberman is the fartin’est animal you’d ever want to meet. We’ve been trying to teach her to do it on command. I think she understands the word and knows that it will net her a treat, but she lacks the ability to time it.
A grizzly bear is taking a dump up against a tree. A rabbit sits down next to him and starts doing his business. The bear looks down at the rabbit and asks him, “Do you have a problem with shit sticking to your fur?” The rabbit replies, “Why, no, I don’t have a problem with it.” So the grizzly picks up the rabbit and wipes his ass with him.
An old family story: My Mom’s dog PeeWee was sleeping on the floor, near the dining table where several family members were sitting and gabbing.
Pee-Dub farted, loudly enough for his humans to chuckle and look over at him in time to see him fart a second time, so loudly that it woke him up with a start. He looked around with a “what the hell was that?” face.
More recently, our gentle giant big orange cat Mike would sometimes fart REALLY loud. Louder than human people. Seriously.
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Celtling and I had a brilliant time a few nights ago searching for elephant farts on YouTube. There was a rather spectacualr selection to choose from.
Yes, I know, but if you can’t do it when they are toddlers, when will you?!?
The loudest fart I’ve ever heard was from a mule, actually three crisp, ripe, multi-sputtering bursts that sounded like they were being consciously ejected. It happened right next to a bunch of us 9 year old campers, causing Steve Stolje to laugh so hard he fell off his horse.
Does a duck’s fart echo?
A duck’s fart sounds like “kcauq.”
You know, I think that’s how I want to die. Convulsed with laughter and falling over because of something really silly.
I love a good fart joke, but it’s the mental image of a little kid falling off his horse that’s got me laughing so hard there are tears streaming down my face. Thank God everyone else in the office is out at lunch.
Also, I don’t know why, but the fact that you still recall his full name makes it 20% funnier.
I was at a fair once, and my g/f and I just had to go to the petting zoo. There was a little girl there, must’ve been about two years old, petting a goat. And the goat farted in her face and made her cry.