Is Congress ready for a puppy?

This new Onion article seems like a great idea

new puppy link

Seriously, this would be a great character-building thing for Congress and the Senate. Its time they learn to work together and compromise! Like the article says, a little responsibility would be good for them.

I dunno. At this point I’d prefer Congress to have, maybe, a houseplant. Let them take care of that for a year and if it’s still alive then we can talk about a pet.

I love The Onion!



I can see the followup story when animal control has to go in with hazmat suits to rescue the neglected pup.

I’m with the 63% of American’s who is unsure that congress is really ready for this step. “I don’t think they are either mature or responsible enough to care for a puppy. I mean…its CONGRESS after all!” says XT, handsome hispanic and long time Straight Dope lurker. “Really, they shouuld try them out with a gold fish or maybe a house plant first…sort of let them build into it. I certainly wouldn’t trust these folks with MY puppy.”



I’d also have to insist that both sides agree not to filibuster either feeding time or walkies before letting them even think about a dog.

Although filibustering a name choice would probably be okay.

And this would all lend new terror to the phrase “died on the House/Senate floor.” :eek:


I could see them building a $49 million dollar ‘Buster’ museum, complete with a state-of-the-art doghouse and his own personal veterinarians. It’ll be constructed in South Dakota and funded via a rider on a New England highway-improvement appropriations bill.

But the dog’ll be in North Carolina. :smack:

I can’t believe I’m asking this, but it’s too good to pass up, especially since it’s in GD.

Cite? :smiley:

In the immortal words of our now departed friend and guru Alde, I’ll just say “My post is my cite”. :stuck_out_tongue:


Oh, sure, now they say they’ll take care of it. But a year from now do you think it’ll be Rep. Mario Diaz-Balart (R-Florida) out walking the dog? Oh, no. It’ll be me.

I’d forgotten about him, but he sure did leave a lasting impact, didn’t he? I wonder how *he’d * do with a puppy.

Well, Chaney says it won’t be HIM…so yeah, you’d probably be stuck with it Rick. My sympathies.

I was trying to work in somehow that I wouldn’t elect most of those bozo’s in Congress to be dog CATCHERS, let alone care for a puppy, but couldn’t figure out a decent angle. Maybe we could give them some of those yapping mechanized puppies that bark then take a few shuffling steps forward and then bark again all the while wagging their mechanical tails. Think they would notice they weren’t real puppies?


Some things are best not even imagined… <shudders to think what Alde would do with a puppy> :eek:

However, the puppy would probably be safe enough, as long as it wasn’t a US breed. :wink:

The more I think about it, Congress is not ready for a puppy.

As soon as the back door gets left open and Buster gets out and knocks over a trash can, the Republicans and Democrats will be bickering about who’s fault it was. Then Sean Hannity and Ann Coulter will blame it on the liberals and use it as an example of how the democrats are destroying America.

What breed?

Why, a Freedom Poodle, of course.

I anticipate a great scandal when it is revealed that Members have been using office staff to walk, feed, and play with the dog at taxpayers’ expense.