Ahh, it’s good to be back at work again after almost two weeks away. OK, mostly that’s because I have no computer at home so this is the only way I can visit the boards. But after this past week, I’m just glad to be out of the house.
It all started two days after Christmas. My wife was laid up with a really bad sinus infection so our vacation wasn’t going very well. Then my one year old got the flu. Bad. She threw up all night long (twice on me while I was holding her) and several times in her crib. I spent most of the night doing laundry.
The next day my four year old caught it. She threw up all night long (only once on me). I spent that night doing laundry and scrubbing the carpet.
The next day my five year old caught it. He threw up all night long. But three cheers for the little guy, he’s an old pro at this and he made it to the toilet almost every time. Almost. Only did one load of sheets that night and only had to scrub the carpet once. Woo-hoo!
By the time Sunday rolled around, I could see the light at the end of the tunnel. Then Phase 2 of the flu kicked in. I’ll spare you the gory details, but it involved (to paraphrase Monthy Python) “opening the sluices at both ends.” More laundry, more miserable kids, and the slowly growing feeling that I was going to go mad if I had to get out the Mr. Clean bottle one more time.
Finally, Tuesday morning came, my fun-filled vacation was over, and I headed back to work. I was only here for three hours before my wife called, asking if I could please come home because she had caught it as well, and couldn’t adequetly care for three children while her head was in the toilet every half an hour.
But now it is Thursday, everyone is feeling better, and I somehow managed to escape the nasties. I thank my clean livin’ and blind luck. Ahh, it’s good to be back at work. Just thought I would share.
And let me say that, in my book, you are a SAINT for doing the laundry and providing comfort to the ill members of the family (especially if you did it without complaing).
My husband has a wicked bug that has him heading to the can seven times an hour. Our son is having some pretty scary diapers, too. Going to work today felt like a HOLIDAY. I know what you’re talking about. And what a good dad/husband you are, by the way.
Do you know I have an acquaintance whose husband has NEVER changed a diaper? Their daughter is 20 months old. It literally makes him gag, every time, even just the wet ones. Same with other gross bodily things. She cleans up everything. I’m sorry, I’d hand him a clothespin for his nose and a shot of vodka and say get the h*ll over it, buddy. Surgeons learn to slice and dice without feeling woozy. He can surely learn to get over the smell of pee, for chrissakes.
Although I think she’s nuts to not challenge him, it makes me appreciate dads like B O’ S all the more.
Ah, “two exits, no waiting”- one of our favorite family jokes.
Smokie, you ROCK. My hubby has a “thing” about poopy diapers. He has changed them when forced to, but if I’m due home within the hour, he’ll wait. No, really.
My revenge came one night when I was out and he was bathing the baby. Right after the bath, when he picked the baby up out of the bathtub, Zack pooped on him. I almost died laughing (on the inside).
You are a good man. Keep it up. And if no-one is available to take care of you when you finally get it, let us know! You deserve some TLC!
Aw, shucks. Thanks for your kind words. Just doing my fatherly duties you know. And I didn’t complain (too much). We’ve always used cloth diapers on the kids, so I’m pretty much immune to anything they dish out now. Five years of the ol’ swish-swish-wring-wring in the toliet has given me the fortitude of 10 stout men (roughly equivalent to one mom).
On the plus side, I didn’t have to do much cooking while everyone was laid up. “So, what do you guys want for dinner tonight? Saltine crackers and cranberry juice or saltine crackers and water?”
Ah, the paying of the dues. It’s precisely this sort of thing that will give you major mojo in about 10 years, when the Five is Fifteen and wants a driver’s license RIGHT NOW. You will have paid your dues and will have enough status in the tribe to be able to do the Driver’s License Rite of Passage your way, not his way.
[gives final buffing to halo and hands it back to Screech Owl for the official presentation]
Yikes, DDG! Don’t even metion the Oncoming Teenage Years. I’m trying to pretend they won’t happen. I still can’t believe my son is in Kindergarten already. At the rate time speeds by now, he’ll be pining for that license in just a few short months.
