Retired from the military a couple months back. I was (am) an electrical engineer. I have experience in a very niche area of engineering that I won’t really go into here because it’s not important but I was fortunate enough to be offered a job with a good company for a good salary that started basically the day I took off my uniform. They hired me on as a mid-tier Systems Engineering guy FWIW (for reference’s sake there’s 6 tiers, I’m lvl 4 and get my own office vs. cube city).
So I started a few weeks ago and feel dumb as a box of rocks. Coming on the job and dropping into about 4 different projects that are in various stages of development has been brutal. I’m working in a technology development area and as such all of the projects are “cutting edge” and involve alot of underlying tech that I’m not familiar with at all. The best analogy I can think of is imagine if you are a EE and work on antennas for 20 years and then get dropped in the middle of an ADC or other digital hardware design project and told “Ok, here you go. See ya!”. Yeah, they are both EE type projects, but in very different disciplines.
That’s kind of what’s happened to me. I feel like I’m spending all of my time trying to get academically smart just to understand what I’m working on. It’s hard to describe really. It’s only been about 4 weeks and my friends have told me I’m being too hard on myself and that it’s normal to go through a period of ineffectiveness when you start fresh at a new company.
FWIW I was hired on by a company that I worked very closely with for years and by people who are familiar with my specific background. I didn’t oversell or claim expertise in any field other than my niche. It doesn’t change the fact that I feel way behind the curve and look like a mouthbreather during this spin up time.
Just to say: yes, totally normal. I’ve been there too, it’s pretty weird isn’t? But in a way, it’s really good because it means that you’re having a bit of a “too good to be true”-feeling, right?
There are times when I feel like a fraud. Then I realized I actually know more than management about the technical stuff. And as Chimera said “We’re all frauds” to some extent.
When I retired from the military, I had a few issues like:
What to wear?
Who the hell is the boss?
Only two weeks vacation?
On the flip side:
I get paid for each and every hour?
I get paid a lot per hour?
I can tell my boss to shove it and not go to jail?
The retirement check.
I’m not in tech, but I think I know the feeling. In every job I’ve ever had, I’ve spent my days feeling like I’m getting away with something, and that the fun can only last until they realize that I’m just winging it.
Personally, I’ve learned to think of that feeling as “mental growing pains.”
When it starts creeping up on me, I think “This feeling that I’m a fraud is just fear because I’m in a situation that requires me to overcome challenges that I’m not confident I can handle. This is a chance to grow/learn as I overcome those challenges. I’m only a fraud/impostor if I don’t rise to the challenge.”
Usually, I’m skeptical of anyone who says that you can solve a problem just by feeling differently, but this does work for me. I can’t solve how I feel about myself… but an external challenge? That is solvable.
You are on pretty solid ground - the company knew who they were hiring, so don’t worry about that. The feeling that you are just winging it? Totally normal, and many of your colleagues will be thinking the same thing about themselves, even if they’ve been there for ages.
I figured that bullshit was a job skill, I changed jobs several times, always left on good terms. I always felt some stress at a new job, but I found out that it was normal. If you aren’t making some mistakes, you aren’t doing anything!
One part of this syndrome is worrying that everyone around you is wise to it. You may or may not have that sense, but if you do - ignore it! (For now at least) they all think you are super! Keeping that in mind helps ease the internal insecurity.
Every time I’ve changed job, I’ve experienced a period of terror during which it seems like nothing will ever make sense - everything is too hard, too complex or obscure, etc.
I’ve learned that this is normal - and if you just put your head down and keep going, there comes a point when (often quite abruptly), it all just clicks into place.
A big part of it is just learning the jargon everyone is using, and every company is a little different. I can remember staring in new tech jobs and being terrified after leaving a meets and having no idea what half the people were talking about. In a few months, it’ll all sink in and you’ll be slinging the lingo just like everyone else.
Oh, you need an F-TOT on the BRG for the Eagle5 project? No problem. I can do 6 of those before breakfast!
I always thought this is kind of a good sign. It means you’re taking the job seriously and have an desire to be useful, which is hard to do in the beginning stages of any job. People who never question themselves are the ones I worry about.