Now that I’m almost 32, I hardly ever have orgasms in my sleep anymore. In fact, I can’t remember the last time it happened. I miss this experience. Is there any way to bring it back, or is this just something I have to accept about getting older?
Try thinking about sex as your falling asleep. I have no idea if that will help, but it occasionally works for other topics.
I’m 53. I can barely have orgasms when I’m awake.
I think your wet dream days are gone. Mine were when I was like 17. I discovered other…releases back then.
Try setting your alarm on a day you don’t have to get up. Let the alarm wake you up but then drift back to sleep.
I almost hate having them because invariably I will have a full bladder and have to wake up completely or run the risk of wetting the bed.
Some ways that seem to help as I found, they dive into spiritual/sexual ties between people - a spiritual connection of the hearts, YMMV.
1 - Get sexually attracted to someone you want and abstain from ‘revealing’ yourself sexually.
2 - Get someone sexually attracted to you to a point that she is gratifying herself thinking of you, or fantasizing/dreaming about being with you sexually.
3 - Befriend someone who is in a hot sexual relationship with another, your friendship with her much be close and she and you care for each other. If done right, and other things line up, it will form a love triangle, she will be having sex with them while on the spiritual level making love to you (she does not even have to know this is happening). While this does produce the desired results, it has been ultimately unsatisfying IMHO, but interestingly breaking up with her usually also ends her hot sexual relationship also.
OMG, that made me laugh. Yeah, OP, get used to it. Have fun while you still can when you’re awake!!
When I was younger, that was the answer. I had to not think about sex when going to sleep, to avoid wet dreams.
Mine lasted till I was around 25. I laundered a damn lotta sheets. But, yeah, nowadays, having unwanted orgasms is about as big a problem as having too much money. I could only wish!
don’t ejaculate while you’re awake
This exactly.
But it is a tuff sentence. Better to ejaculate at every opportunity when awake, and forget about the wet dreams.
“You should be saving that for marriage.”
“You bet, Pa! I’ve saved up about fifteen gallons so far!”
I don’t think I had a one until I was 27 or so. Consider what I started doing frequently around 12, maybe you should stop doing that? For awhile? But in other words: some people get them, some don’t.
But yeah, I don’t get what the point is? Make your laundry concerns more urgent? It’s a bit like blacking out and hearing about the awesome night you had, yet you have no happy memories of it. Who cares?
I don’t think I had a one until I was 27 or so. Consider what I started doing frequently around 12, maybe you should stop doing that? For awhile? But in other words: some people get them, some don’t.
But yeah, I don’t get what the point is? Make your laundry concerns more urgent? It’s a bit like blacking out and hearing about the awesome night you had, yet you have no happy memories of it. Who cares?
This. The “no fap” people swear by it. I think I’m going to find out soon for myself.
Me n long term bfriend broke up…we had a great sex life…I never remember my dreams but I’m 35 and had one the other day resulting in two orgasms the dreams were erotic and about the bfriend I just broke up with. I’ve only had a hanful my whole life but each time I did I woke up needing to pee bad…the full bladder stimulates that feeling resulting in wet dreams…some ppl never experience a wet dream…again I’m 35. Its possible…and awesome
Wait. What???
This’ll get interesting.
I haven’t experienced that since puberty, but I won’t dismiss that this type of dream came (not intended) without me maybe grinding the bed, or grabbing Mr. Happy while asleep.
Another old saying pops into the head: If your pee is clear, you’re hydrated. If it’s dark, you’re dehydrated. If it’s white, you have too many wet dreams. 
Correct. We also would’ve accepted “WTF?” “uhhhh…” or “what in the name of all that’s holy are you freakin’ talking about?”
Yes hard to explain, but while I don’t care to state my age, lets just say I have been having WD’s well beyond the ages stated here, not as frequent as my teen’s, twenties and early 30’s but still have them and suspect I always will.
Trying to explain as best and I can and to my understanding of how it works, there is a physical and spiritual component to sex, the spiritual component is best explained as the emotional component of sex, the bonding between the 2 people.
Before sexuality develops, we as children can and do emotionally attach to our friends and schoolmates, pretty much ‘innocently’ as sexuality (and sexual emotional attachments) has not developed in us yet. But we still do connect with our friends and family on a ‘innocent’ emotional level even at this stage. This emotional attachment goes beyond just our physical being and its limits, but can and is suppose to connect with others, ultimately, like so many philosophies, in a ‘we are all connected’, and ‘we are all one with each other’ sense. Children are much more in touch with this deep connection then adults normally.
When we start to develop the ability for sex in our teens, it is a new physical ability that comes with a new sexual emotional attachment component. At first this emotional component is uncontrolled and attaches very much like in childhood, going out to everyone you know, just like the childhood attachments, but only with the sexual component now added in.
Highschools, in a spiritual sense, are blind orgy fests with sexual emotional attachment going out to each and all, sharing between classmates, not really knowing who our sexual energy is attaching to or know the person who is connecting to us. This is the reason for the wet dreams and the ‘pop up boner’ when you may not be even thinking of sex like in the middle of math class or something. It is some else’s connection to you that is exciting you, and you do the same to others you connect with.
It is also what allows what I call the ‘bad boy syndrome’ that girls seem to go through, where a girl desires sex with the typical ‘dirtbag guy’, it is not his sexual energy she is feeling nor his heart, but some guys energies that she is using (unknowingly) to be able to have a physical relationship with him (this is the basis for the love triangle aspect I stated above). In this case she thinks she sees something good in this ‘dirtbag guy’, but that part she is attracted to is really the heart of the other guy which she has unknowing connected to. And usually if the ‘good guy’ cuts ties with her, she will cease to see any good in the ‘dirtbag guy’ and typically end the relationship.
Sometime in our late teen’s early twenties we learn to control this energy, we target where it goes and who it connects with. We also unfortunately but commonly learn to block the emotional (spiritual) connection, and just have it as mostly a physical act. This limits our ability to connect emotionally with others on a soul to soul level, which limits the times and chances to experience wet dreams, as the wet dream experience is that soul to soul emotional attachment.
So to help experience the wet dreams again as I see it, you must make sure you are emotionally open, not reserved in this, which means you will put yourself in vulnerable positions on a emotional level and can and will get hurt at times but allow the healing that comes. Invest emotionally in others. You will also want to find other people who likewise put their heart out and really care for others. A heart to heart bonding should occur, though that by itself does not mean that sexuality and wet dreams will flow, it could, it depends on what type of bond naturally forms, typically it will be one or more of the following parent-child, child-parent, child-child, adult-adult, and/or mates (w/ sexual energy attachment).
There is a lot more to all this, including good vs bad bonds, positive mutual building relationships vs negative parasitic relationships, and blocks on sexual energy flow, including starting to get aroused by thinking about someone then it suddenly stops like a door closes and even sexual dysfunction.
I find that at 41, dreams about sex are not the problem. I still get those, frequently. Just nothing useful ever comes of it. Pain in dreams is muted most of the time, as is pleasure. So I don’t know that telling him how to get laid more in his dreams will really solve his problem.
I can’t imagine why you would leave your orgasmic fantasies to the random chance of your dream world. Just jerk off with some nice carefully crafted sexy-time scenarios so you don’t have to risk this juicy nightmare:
“Oh yeah baby, right there, ohhh yeah…wait, Bob? What the hell are you doing here? No! Don’t touch me there! Jeez! Oh, your back is so damn hairy. Wait is that a dead horse? No Bob, don’t put your mouth on its-- holy shit, MOM?!? Oh shit, I’m gonna come…” And scene.