I should also say that medication alone generally will not help a personality disorder. These problems are deeply ingrained within a person’s thought process and behavior and usually require at least a year or two of therapy or counseling to work through.
Podkayne, I feel bad about the situation Chief Crunch is in. That’s why I wrote what I wrote. I have a family member that is suffering from clinical depression. I feel really bad that his illness is robbing him of opportunities. I am in no way picking on him. I want him to succeed, but I also don’t want him to lose any more time. No one gets lost time back. I don’t want him to end up like my 82 year-old grandfather, who regrets his whole life. Maybe, with the right medication and therapy, Chief Crunch will be in a better position to take advantage of opportunities that come his way. It was my clumsy way of trying to help.
Also, Podkayne, he didn’t say that he couldn’t ask a girl out on a date…he said that he needed to be certain that she liked him first…I was addressing the issue of certainty.
mikeymichaels said:
All well and good, but this analogy works only if B has the talent/ability/looks/whatever to warrant this attempt. If not, he or she is liable to have the exact same life as A…except A can still dream about it, and B knows the dream is deader than shit.
To put it another way…you may believe you can fly, while I’d like to but believe I can’t. If you follow your belief by throwing yourself off a cliff and flapping your arms you have a better chance of flying than I do, because I won’t make the attempt. But the end result is most likely going to be you getting scraped up with a shovel, while I’ll still be alive wishing I could fly.
Needless to say, I understand where Chief Crunch is coming from painfully well.
Hmmm, I had/have a crush on a girl at my school that probably doesn’t know that I exist. Haven’t seen her in a while though.
To MysterEcks:
You made a good point. The problem with your argument [in relation to my statement]is the difference between possibility and probability.
My point was that it is POSSIBLE to become a movie star. It is certainly not a PROBABILITY, but some people have taken the risk and have beaten the odds. Would anyone disagree with this fact?
Your point dwells on IMPOSSIBILITY. It is biologically IMPOSSIBLE for a human being to fly. In my example, if a risk is taken, you have a chance of success, no matter how tiny [even non-ideal physical types and bad actors can at least get acting jobs], but in your example, a risk equals absolutely no chance of success.
Even though I understand your point, I felt that your example did not reflect my point fairly or accurately.
Francis Scott Key and Peter Lorre, but it hasn’t been a problem so far.
I have a crush on Creaky, but she definitely knows I exist.
There are several doper chicks who know I exist and that I have mad lustbunny crushes on, but my happy partnership precludes me from naming them.
Well, golly, Geobabe. Thanks! Same here, by the way!
I had a crush on a guy for six years. I’d spoken to him once or twice, but I didn’t really know him. He was just some guy I passed on the street quite a bit, and I’m pretty sure he lived in my dorm my freshman year. I referred to him as Mr. X for years because I didn’t know his name. I finally saw him with someone I knew and so found out his name. About three years later I started dreaming about him, so I emailed him. It was awkward at first. I just told him I knew him through the other friend and I wanted to know how the friend was doing because I hadn’t seen him in years.
Mr. X has a girlfriend, which I figured he would, but luckily for me, his personality and intellect did nothing for me. In the six years it took me to finish two degrees, he hadn’t even finished his first. Yikes.
There are a few charming fellas here at the SDMB, but my coy facade prevents me from naming them. 
Oh, and there’s a sweet but shy coach at work that keeps staring at me. I need to check into that. Coaches usually repulse me, but I suppose he deserves at least a conversation.
And then there’s my crush on Jake Pratt, a fictional character, and the actress who played her, Katherine Moennig. My one and only bi obsession.
Since I go from zero to crush in about thirty seconds and work with the public (ugh, retail…but it has its upsides) I have about 5,873,027 unrequited crushes. Not to mention the people I just think are hot as hell.
I don’t ask them out because it annoys my boyfriend when I bring other guys home.
Have you read “Thank You For Smoking?” It’s a hilarious book, and Peter Lorre actually figures into it as a minor character.
Anyway, I got a crush on one of my male cousins when I was a pre-teen. It never really went away. I know he had no idea and still doesn’t. As it is, I rarely see him.
I also had a crush on one of my students when I was TAing. He never knew, and there was no way I’d reveal it.
MrBlue92 has no idea I have a crush on him, and I’m not telling him because he’d get all embarrassed and stuff. He is such a nice person to talk to, I’d hate to make things awkward (although since I’m a pudgy ol’ married woman, surely he knows there is no danger of me ever attacking him or soliciting return affection). Nobody tell him, M-kay? How anyone could NOT develop a crush on such a nice, intelligent, amusing, attractive, polite guy is beyond me.
Cranky, thanks for the tip. I just ordered the book from Amazon.com. I’m assuming it’s the one by Christopher Buckley, right? I’ll let you know how I like it!
I have crushes on at least two dozen people here, and am mighty fond of several people both here and elsewhere. Some of them know, and some of them do not.
The sad thing is, some of the ones I don’t think know … probably do. And maybe it’s requited, but I’d have to take risks to find out.
Two crushes right now, one I’ve actually acted upon (and went into probably too much detail in a different thread), that one is a pretty recent development.
The other one is a woman I’ve known for a few years now, I probably will never say anything to her about it.
Ever look at someone and think to yourself “That is soooo out of my league”? That be this one.
Are we talking current crushes? Man I’d hate to go back to high school days and try to count all of those… 
“Is there someone you have a crush on?”
At the moment, no, and I miss it.
Latest crush, that I will actually try and do something about, is a guy who works in my department, but not someone I have to work with on any sort of regular basis. I’ve known him very casually almost a year, but now he works in the aisle next to me. Very cute, smart, friendly, great smile.
Accomplished so far:
- Stroll by his desk when he is not there to look for signs of Significant Other - Check - no SO evidence.
- Take earliest opportunity to make suggestive comment, with eye contact - Check. Twice this morning as a matter of fact.
- Fantasize about crush at every opportunity - oh yeah.
Next steps:
- Stop by desk when he is actually there, ask how holiday/weekend was, fish for SO reference.
- Ask out to lunch.
- If lunch is good, ask out to dinner
- If dinner is good, ask him to do me. Well, maybe not after the first dinner.
- If sex is good, try to set up nooners. I live 15 minutes from the office.
Obviously this is not the guy who was mentioned on page 1 of this thread. He is now out of the picture.