A few years ago my gf was very ill*. After the fourth day of 104 fever and two ER visits with no diagnosis and a planned spinal tap to rule out meningitis, I told her, “Hey, maybe I should start dating again”.
It was a joke, and improved her spirits briefly.
If the gf in the OP was kidding around, then haha. If not, then move on.
*Lyme. Full resolution on doxycycline.
She’s hedging her bets and it is incredibly hurtful, though she probably doesn’t think so.
I’m curious… Does this girl have Borderline Personality Disorder?
That girl doesn’t understand what a relationship means.
Slightly hurtful, possibly hurtful, need more context to decide.
Good grief… did she ask that “forsaking all others” be removed from the ceremony?
As for the OP, I’d plan on being single in December.
I bet she’s single in December!
Since when does seeing a friend hinge upon being unattached? Rather disingenuous statement, I’d say. Also shows a level of emotional involvement with the current boyfriend (that level being minimal) that doesn’t bode well for the relationship.
I tend to give folks the benefit of the doubt, at least the first time. I voted “slightly hurtful” because I could certainlly understand the current BF being miffed, but I can also see it as a poorly worded response with no ill intent. Maybe she didn’t want to see old BF but didn’t have the guts to say so directly - “I’d love to see you but I’m not single/doing my hair/have an important TV show to watch”.
Maybe I’m wrong. I suppose that could eventually happen.
What, your being wrong eventually? Perish the thought! 
Next someone will tell me I don’t actually know everything.
Just go away. You don’t deserve this. What does she mean by “if I’m single by December?” Does she plan to?
Lot’s of fish in the sea. Don’t bother with this one, it smells … fishy 
Was this just a clumsy way for the GF to clue her old friend in that she’s seeing somebody?
Same with me. It could have just been an awkward response which came out way way wrong. Maybe the intent wasn’t looking ahead to singleness. However, not seeing that it could be hurtful is not a good sign.
My take on the question you’re asking – and really, the specific situation doesn’t even matter – is that it doesn’t matter if a behavior is deemed hurtful or harmless by other people, or in general, or to what degree. It also doesn’t matter if you “should” feel hurt or not. What matters is only if you are hurt by it or not, at which point, you decide what to do about that, for you personally.
If I personally were in an exclusive 4-month relationship that was frequently rocky, and I learned my boyfriend had told someone he’d meet up with them in December “if he’s single at that time,” I’d think he already knows he wants out of the relationship, so let’s break up now and be done with it. If I’m only four months into a relationship and we’re already having problems, then the relationship is just not worth the effort to sustain (and, in retrospect, wasn’t worth the effort I already put into it). It stings to learn a guy I thought was serious about me is not, but I’m always glad to break things off sooner than later.
But that’s just me. [del]You[/del], errrr, the guy in the OP is clearly hurt by his girlfriend’s statement or this wouldn’t even be an issue, so he should come to terms with that and follow through accordingly. Whether that means breaking up with her, having a frank discussion, throwing her belongings out a window into the street while screaming “WHOOOOORRRREEEE”, that’s up to him.
I disagreed with the majority. It could have been crappy phrasing or the woman could be just one of those people who’s language is more exacting. To be hurt by it, requires a deliberate reading in of context that’s hasn’t been spoken.
“Call him back and see if he’ll see you now. Bye.”
Because you fucking KNOW she’s going to be playing games in December trying to see him.
She will be having sex with him in December, one way or another.
That was my thought as well.
But I’m a little baffled about the “it’s been fairly rocky transitioning from a life of dating fun to a more mundane everyday relationship” part. That seems weird- the exclusivity part should have come considerably earlier, and any “mundane everyday relationship” ought to be much later, IMO.
Four months is right when the “dating fun” for an exclusive couple really gets rolling, not where the fun goes to die, and some kind of boring pseudo-married life begins.
Hell, for my wife and I, it was probably more fun as we got more committed- less time was spent sweating what the other one would say and whether we’d dump each other, and more fun was spent enjoying each other’s company. It hasn’t stopped, although now that we have kids, we don’t get nearly so much opportunity to go out and have fun as we once had as a couple without kids.
I’d agree with this statement - in every relationship I’ve been in, it got more fun when both folks knew where they stood. You didn’t have to worry so much about making a wrong step and could just enjoy being yourself a little more.
I missed the four months “mundane everyday relationship part” as well. That’s an incredibly short honeymoon period for a relationship.
I’ve always gone with the “If you can’t tell your partner, it’s cheating.”
So this was actually one of many such incidents (you can read more about it here if you have a penchant for reading other people’s drama). She didn’t really see the problem even after reading this thread and poll. ‘Callous’ was probably the best description I read upthread. At most after arguing about these things, I would get an apology to placate me, not because she truly seemed to be sorry that she was hurting my feelings. I didn’t end the relationship over this particular issue, but I did not long ago over another incident. Thank you everyone for your input. It still hurts, though.