It came to me in a dream.

Have you ever had a dream, and while dreaming, you see something you can’t figure out, and the first thing you think is, “I should ask the Dopers about this?” or possibly some other authority on the subject? But you’re still dreaming, you see, and when you wake up, posting your question to the Dope suddenly makes no sense at all… because, you know, the question came to you in a dream?

For example: last night I dreamt about some strange bugs. They were large, orange, and looked like shrimp. The largest one held the apartment door open a crack, and waved some smaller ones inside. I saw it happening and was* horrified*! What are these new bugs that just let themselves into my apartment? I ran down the hall to get my husband, shooed the cats out of the way, so they didn’t eat the bugs (I was afraid they might be poison), but when I showed them to my husband, they became immobile, and turned themselves into something resembling a starfruit. So now we just had these starfruits laying on our floor. I looked at my husband and said, “I need to ask the Dopers what these are. Someone is sure to know, and maybe we can find out how to get rid of them. Oh, and don’t squish them when they’re like that, it might be hard to get out of the carpet.”

Eventually, I wake up, and my mind is racing. Bugs! I think, feeling urgent. I have to go ask the Dopers what kind of bugs… turn… into… starfruit? Damnit.


Ever do this? What questions did you wake up with, ready to bring to the Dope, or a teacher, or your mother?

I’ve never had one of those but the bugs are called Starfruti Biggus Shrimpus. They do tend to do that, but for only $99 I can send you a spraycan of Starfuti Biggus Shrimpus Away!. +$3.95 for shipping and handling.

Call now and we’ll throw in Elephant Away! for those times when you have even bigger problems.