I have to be passive when I want to be active. I want to step in and try to help when I have to sit back and not get involved. I want to get into a mire of family politics just to help the children caught in the crossfire. But as my parents and others have pointed out to me, it isn’t worth the danger.
My family had a large steamy pile of shit come to fruition this weekend and family politics have created a warzone between my father and brother-in-law & sister. Putting their children in a danger zone that I am not comfortable with. With my sister and her douchebag of a husband both having alcohol problems, weed addictions, which is fine when you can be responsible if you need to be instead of using it to run from your problems, which is what they do.
They have continuous money issues yet are never without alcohol, cigarettes or weed.
So with issues which I will spare you all the details of, my brother-in-law went off the deep end and is irate with my father for reasons that do not merit it. My dad does have a tendency to cross boundaries but this was not one of them. And now the brother-in-law has me very worried for the safety of my sister and her children. Unfortunately they are dependant on him for money and since she defended the last asshole husband who abused her and broke her eye socket, I doubt she’s apt to leave this waste-of-space.
I want to go and try to help, to be a good role model for her kids, but my mom and dad don’t think it’s a good idea as good ole’ Senor de Moron may try to take his anger out on me. I guess I agree that it is a possible scenario, but I think it a doubtful scenario. What happens in this way is that he and my sister try to polarize the siblings against my dad. So I think it more likely that I would be okay, but as he’s acting crazy I can’t be sure.
And having to sit back and rest on my hands is driving me nuts. It truly does go against my grain.
I don’t understand what you were planning on doing once you got to their house. If you feel the children are in immediate danger, call the cops. But your sister will probably be arrested along with her husband if they have dope in the house. Do you feel the children should be removed from the environment? Are there relatives who can care for them? Are they incapable of caring for their children while they’re smoking/drinking? These are all questions you need to answer before turning all their lives upside down. Not liking them or not approving of their lifestyle isn’t enough.
I wasn’t planning on doing anything except being there and hanging out with the kids. If I saw evidence of violence then I’d call the cops, but given my brother in law’s behavior we’re concerned he may go off the deep end.