To have sex in the woods today.
It’s never too cold to have sex in the woods. Just think friction… ahhhh, wonderful, sensual friction.
Sex in the woods is so awkward.
“Um, honey? There’s a twig in my back.”
And having to check each other for ticks just kills the romance.
That ain’t a twig, darlin’…
Ah, to be a stick or branch…
If I was one to use sigs, I’d want to use this!! Cracked me up big time!!!
Well, you can come up here and have sex in the woods with Bluesman, then, ‘cause it’s way too cold for me, and he’s rarin’ to go!
You just have to make sure to set it up right… find a good sized rock, lay a nice, warm blanket down, make sure you have a thermos full of nice, hot chocolate… Mmmmmm…
I wonder if I can find any unoccupied woods on Long Island today…
And here I was thinkin’ Bluesman was asexual…
ChiefScott!!
[breathy Kathleen Turner voice]
Hey, baby.
[/bKTv]
With my kind of lesbo sex, it damn well better be.
Nah, Chief, we Air Force men dig chicks! We’re A PLUS sexual! (Extra credit on oral exams.)
I hear that about you wingnuts BM… talk, talk, talk. Going about the sex act all stealthy and shit.
[breathless Roger Rabbit voice]
Hey, b-b-b-b-baby.
[/bRRv]
So sex in the snow is right out, then?
Damn.
If you’re willing to be on the bottom, I think I can help you out.
Things are looking up…so to speak!
It snowed here last night, a couple inches
Well, you’re welcome to think about it.
http://www.wmich.edu/english/tchg/lit/pms/herrick.vine.html
The greatest baudy poem of all time
Yeah, I was out in the woods yesterday. My partner was wearing far more clothing than usual and telling me to hurry up, my hands were cold, my balls didn’t feel right, my shaft just didn’t have the right “flex” to it and I thought, “Damn, it’s too cold to lose a golf ball in the woods today.”
Lucretia, you can always go inside for sex. But in a couple of weeks, I’m going to be done swinging for four to five months. No more standing around thinking about my putts. Believe me, four months without golf is worse than four months without sex.
Well, no it isn’t. But I’m still bummed. Maybe I’ll just think about sex, indoors. With a shapely golf pro.
mmmmmmmmm… sex in the snow
sigh