Trebuchets are pretty easy, have decent range, and very good accuracy (assuming your projectiles are consistent in size and shape). Not that I’m trying to suggest you build a medieval siege engine in your backyard to lob flaming balls of hand sanitizer over your house and onto the street to deter those crazy kids on their quads. Not at all.
I have it on good authority that if you spray a really heavy layer of furniture polish on an old coffee table then flip a lit match onto it things can get really interesting.
My brother, on the other hand, discovered that if you mix up rocket fuel in Mother’s Good Saucepan there will, indeed, be Hell To Pay. And boy is it 'spensive.
And lastly, from my days as a Teaching Assistant in Introductory Microbiology Lab I can say that burning hair smells really bad. Frizzy hair goes up the fastest.
Thus ends FlameTalk. Thank you for your attention.
There’s nothing quite like the smell of burning/burnt hair. And, here’s your safety tip for the day, kiddies: When lighting a gas grill, if it takes too long to ignite, turn off the gas and give it a rest. Otherwise, you risk a fooooomf followed by that smell of burning hair.
Fortuantely, I didn’t lose my eyebrows. Just a little of my bangs…
I’d like to point out that if you’re about 13 years old, and your parents’ garage is infested with bugs, attempting a little home-grown extermination with a can of swimming pool chlorine powder and a bottle of brake fluid might not be the best idea. I mean, it might work but it probably wouldn’t be worth it.
You know. Just thinking out loud here.
Oh Scout, you’re such a girl. I guess that’s why I like you though, Since if I liked boys, I’d be all mooney over Swampy.
Oh, and thanks so much people. Bringing up Peeps already. (I’m looking at you Ashes[sup]2[/sup].) What will I use for the subject of next week’s MMP? Huh? Not Peeps now, that’s for sure.
Flames burn up Snickers. If you leave the gas on too long (accidentally, of course) and then light it with the hole in the bottom of the grill (which is what it’s there for) you have to squat down below the lip of the grill. This acts as a “flame shield” so the fireball can’t get at you. That’s just good design.
You know what’s a good hobby for a kid? Model rockets. Yeah, they are loads of fun. You take all that time building them, getting them just right, and then you can make them fly too. It’s really the perfect hobby for a kid.
Taking the engines apart to see what the rocket fuel looks like is not so much a good hobby. Well, it’s not the taking the engine apart that’s not the best idea (but it’s up there), so much as, maybe, grinding the unwrapped engine fuel (store-bought rockets use a solid fuel engine that just anybody can go buy) up into a powder. This isn’t so good because you might not grind it up enough, so there are some big chunks of engine left. The big chunks are bad because when you light them (oh yeah, big surprise!) and big chunk of flaming engine will shoot off randomly. Not really so randomly, more like right for the rest of the pile of ground up rocket engine fuel. This makes your (not so much “your” as "your parents’ ") basement smell really bad. I won’t even mention the clouds of yellow smoke. Why, you might as well have been playing with fireworks!
Not that I’d know. This is just stuff I’ve heard about. You know, like on the playground.
But flying model rockets themselves is a good hobby for a kid.
-Rue. (much safer to be around than he sounds)
This reminds me of the home chemistry lab I had in the basement. Shelves full of bottles of various chemicals, most of them purchased over the counter at the local hobby shop. I would occasionally make “gunpowder” by grinding together sulfer, powdered charcoal, and potassium nitrate. I was obviously doing something wrong, because the resulting mixture never exploded when ignited, but just burned and shot off sparks. I later tried adding small slivers of magnesium, which made for an impressive display.
I was also into model rocketry. Now that’s a hobby with some serious damage potential. Despite the repeated requests of a friend, however, I never did try to rig a rocket so it would set off an M-80 instead of opening its parachute. Well, I did try to figure out how to do it, but never tested any of my theories.
I’d just like to point out that I had not read Rue’s post before hitting “submit’” on mine. Great minds thinking alike, I guess.
When I was in 9th grade, we built rockets in science class - Mr. McGuire was the best teacher!!! That was the year my love of science grew exponentially.
Anyway, he had a catalog, and we ordered our own personal Estes rocket kits, plus we gave him money to buy all the rocket engines. This wasn’t just an arts and crafts exercise - we learned about rocketry, then we were going to see it in action. Grades were based on how well you built your rocket, how well it flew, and whether you recovered it intact. I got an “A” - but one kid had problem with his tail fins and his rocket flew into a backyard near the school - luckily, it didn’t break anything or hurt anyone.
That was the class where we took apart and reassembled a lawnmower engine after learning about internal combustion engines. Then we got to drive a go cart around campus. We threw eggs, after deciding the best way to package them to prevent damage on impact (I used popcorn). We even had a still. He distilled some stuff down to almost pure alcohol, and let those who wanted to have an eyedropperful sample. Can you even imagine that happening today?
I loved that class. I wonder if he’s still alive - dang, it was school year '68-'69.
Ever seen a still being blown up by the Feds? Now that’s cool! FWOOSH KABOOM KABOOM FWOOSH All the really neat blow up sounds.
See, my cousin and I discovered a still waaaaaaaaaay back in the woods of my uncle’s (his father’s for you geneology freaks) farm. The farm was over 300 acres with a lot of woods. Anyways, we told my uncle (cousin’s father) about it after, of course, assuring him that we didn’t sample any of the contents (ha!ha!) and he called the Sherrif who got the Feds in on it. Since they were gonna blow it up, we asked if we could watch and, being cool Feds, they let us!
BTW, did y’all know a string of firecrackers can really wreak havoc on a Ken doll? I don’t care what my sister said, he was a communist spy and needed blowing up! My cousin agreed with me even. However, all firecrackers will do to a “cornshock hut” is burn it down. Bummer.
Rue I am flattered that you’d be all moony all over me if you liked boys. Now if I could only find another boy who likes boys to get all moony over me.
-swampbear (I said I wanted him all moony over me not I wanted him to moon me)
I’ve always wanted to try corn likker made from a real back-woods still. Outta a Mason jar, just for the authenticity. But then, I’ve wanted to try chitlins made by a large woman named “Ruby”. We all have our goals in life, these are some of mine.
Rue, oddly enough, (or maybe not) if you are ever in my neck of the woods, I could assist you in attaining both goals.
Hee! Then my work here is done!
Really Rue, you can never discuss the artificial goodness that is Peeps too often. Ashes, worshipper at the altar of Peeps, true Peep-ology believer, awaits next monday with bated breath.
I once made something alcoholic. I don’t think it was moonshine 'cause it was bubbly, and it was in a food container, not a Mason jar. Just so you know, cut strawberries left to macerate in sugar can get delightfully powerful after a couple three days. Also, homemade gingerbeer can get strong too. Quite the surprise when you’re eight and the room gets all spinny.
I advise great caution with those chitlin dreams of yours Rue. Even if a large woman named Ruby is serving them. She can just as easily serve up some chicken fried steak.
Hmmm… I haven’t smelled someone else’s hair burning since that day I was bored in study hall. Man, that’s stuffs like really flammable, especially when they run.
I remember those model rockets too! I didn’t have a launcher so you know what happens when you put a firecracker fuse in the little hole? Sadly, nothing.
Anybody else think of a certain Doper when they read this?
If you ever do this, and the guy who gives it to you asks if you smoke, and you say yes, and then he tells you to just sip it and not shoot a whole glass straight back, it’s best to listen to his advice if you don’t want to stop breathing for a couple of minutes.
Or so I’m told.
They also do some neat tricks when microwaved.
Ah yes, microwaved Peeps get quite angry, understandably. I giggle to watch them swell up like weensy Incredible Hulks. They calm down right away but then they’re useless for eatin’. Sweet rubber bands is a good way to think of them, post-microwaving.
This thread reminds me of that scene in the Futurama episode “Luck of the Fryfish” (which I just bought on DVD!) where Yancy blows Fry’s safe open by sticking Play-Doh in the seam between the door and the body of the safe, and lights it on fire. He should’ve used hand sanitizer, from the sound of things.
The problems with a trebuchet is that it is very difficult to hit a moving target with one. Now, if Rue wants to feed the little monsters on his street Hot Flaming Death, then he needs one of these: http://www.clowningaround.net/WaterBalloon/
Good range, and tracking ability, suitable for both Peeps and Hand Sanitizer. 
LeeshaJoy presents How to Make a Model Rocket When You’re Too Cheap or Lazy to Get an Actual Rocket Kit.
1.) Gather the following materials:
[ul]
[li]A smallish tin can[/li][li]A flat, fairly sturdy piece of metal (we used the base of an old floor lamp)[/li][li]Firecrackers[/li][li]A sibling with a book of matches and a lot of time on his hands[/li][/ul]
2.) Go out into an open space and set the sturdy piece of metal on the ground.
3.) Place one (1) firecracker on the piece of metal.
4.) Place the tin can, open end down, onto the metal in such a way as to cover the firecracker but leave the fuse sticking out.
5.) Have your sibling light the fuse and back away.
6.) Watch the blast of the firecracker propel the can 4 to 6 feet in the air.
7.) Repeat as necessary.
What can I say? Summer afternoons at my grandmother’s farm could get really boring sometimes.