My younger brother, the aforementioned rocket fuel manufacturer, had all sorts of ways to alleviate boredom. I got quite a kick myself out of watching most of them. Please note most.
His homemade ozone generator was pretty neat but it gave me a headache. I’m not sure what he was attempting when he vaporized the outlet in his room. All I know is that there were scorch marks on the wall and grandmother saw a fireball rolling down the hallway.
The best incident I remember (quite fondly) occured on a hot summer’s day. He decided to entertain himself by sucking bees into a soda straw and spitting them at people. Not me fortunately, which was why I enjoyed it so much. The amusement factor shot way up when he inhaled just a leetle too much. Sort of a backfire you might say.
The time he drew lightning down on the house I found a lot less amusing.
I’m funny that way I guess.
Did you know I heard that spraying hairspray onto black widow spiders and then immediately putting it on fire is a good way to kill the spider. But it is not a good thing to do when the black widow is on the ceiling inside the house cause the web will burn and that piece of peeling paint that was hanging down catches fire and then you have to run and get water but there is not real damage. That is what I have heard, so do this only outside with a bucket of water handy.
That reminds me of the ice storm of 2002. The cat tried to warm herself with the candle. Imagine my surprise when I saw smoke rising the the cat’s backside. She was all right(physically),but a little shaken from having her human beating out the flames while screaming “DAMNIT YOU’RE ON FIRE!”
Suddenly I have a craving for Kung Pao.
I have experienced drinkin’ real ‘shine from a big ol’ mason jar. The stuff came from ol’ West Virginny.
I gotta tell you, I must be a lush, because I took a big ol’ gulp of it and my eyes didn’t even water. My daddy was rather shocked that his lil’ girl could handle her booze like man. :o
Oh, and the fire thing. Never, ever, ever, play with matches when you’re wearing a little nightie made from that nylon type material. And then, never, ever, EVER, try to hide the fact that you played with fire from your Mommy. Because Mommys just “know” certain things, 'specially if you’re lying and there’s a little burnt hole in your nighty…RIGHT…IN…FRONT.
Also, I had “WHOOSH” thing happen to me. I wasn’t safety conscious (or very patient) with my gas grill. I didn’t do the turn the grill off and wait for five minutes thing. I turned the gas back on and threw a lit match on the little lava rock thingies. Not only did I get a bigwhoosh, it was preceeded by a huge FWUMP! Yep, burnt arm hair just doesn’t smell very pleasant. It’s even more embarrassing after the fact. I had one arm with hair, and the other was bare…for a long, long, time. :o
The above method works well with tent caterpillar nests too. Um, just remember to detatch the tent caterpillar nest-holding branch from the rest of the tree first. Baby plums don’t grow into succulent, juicy grown-up plums if they’ve made too close an acquaintance with fire.
Tikki–who is proud to say she has both regular Purell Hand Sanitizer and Purell Hand Sanitizer with Aloe and can’t wait to put a kitchen match to some.
Um, I was referring to Deb2World’s black widow method for tent caterpillars. I don’t recommend dealing with either black widows or tent caterpillars in your nightie, especially when fire is involved.
The only thing I have to add to this thread is that if there is a really ugly pug dog in your neighborhood owned by a nasty old lady, and you have some firecrackers, make sure the little pile o’ pug-poo is a coupla days old.
Tikki, I have had to google “tent caterpillar”. I hope you are happy. [www.uky.edu/Agriculture/Entomology/entfacts/trees/ef423.htm+%22tent+caterpillars%22&hl=en&ie=UTF-8]our](http://66.102.7.104/search?q=cache:ZBw_OApxI9gJ:[url) friend the tent caterpillar It is a cute little thing. Colorful and then I notice it becomes a moth. Ugh, I am not a moth fan. Too many memories of moths and light, lots of moths, lots lots of moths, get them off, eek, bad memories. The caterpillar builds their nest in the crotch of trees, sorta like my dog except she puts her nose in people’s crotches and has never turned into a moth or at least I haven’t caught her at it.
Deb2world, sure, one tent caterpillar is cute but they come in packs of about a gazillion, all of them creating this ucky, icky huge messy web thing that kills off what leaves they manage not to eat. By the way, that link is for eastern tent caterpillars. We must have the western ones here because they like the ends of branches, covering the last foot or two of them with their ucky, icky huge messy web things. That generally make it easier to detach the limb and set it on fire.
And on the up side, we don’t have black widow spiders.
After reading Taters’ post I have to wonder if there’s a difference between West Virginia 'shine and New Hampshire 'shine. Probably not. More likely, I’m just a wuss.
I mean, that guy that swilled down the 'shine that one time is a wuss. Yeah, that’s it.
See, this is part of the reason why your such a great guy Swampy. Always willing to lend a hand. I salute you.
But chicken fried steak… no, I’ve already had that. But if Ruby is whipping some up anyway, it would be rude to say no. I wouldn’t want to be thought rude.
I “need one of these” silenus? But I count two (two!) bikini-clad Lovely Assistants. I guess you mean they come as a set and I’d need one set. Yes I do.
Everyone who think Taters should show us the nighty she means, raise your hands. Yeah, that’s what I thought. Taters, the ball is now in your court. So to speak.
It’s OK Ex. We still respect you. Well, at least just as much as we always have.
Rue I don’t know if it’s Ruby who’s boiling/frying (you can get em both ways) up big ol’ messes (chitlin’ come in messes) of chitlins at the place I’m thinking of, but I’m sure there’s a Ruby here somewhere boiling/frying up big ol’ messes of chitlins. I’d still wanna take ya to the place I’m thinking of though cause they have fried chicken, liver and onions and greens to die for.
The 'shine is not quite so easy to come by but doable.
I was a wee little tyke of four when the fire incident occurred. It was a cute, little pink, shortie type nightie, with matching panties.
Sadly, (or not, depending on your point of view), I don’t think that little nightie would fit anymore. I don’t think I could get it past my, um…boobies, anymore. :o
I now have other, cough, ahem, nighties and such that fit a little better. However, I don’t think Mr. Taters would appreciate me sharing how they fit with anyone but him. He gripes I don’t wear 'em enough anyway.
Let’s just say he likes to start out the “activities” with the nighties, bustierres (sp/), etc., but they don’t stay on very long…
He also likes to ply me with adult beverages in hopes that I will be “in the mood” to commence with such activities. Hmm, perhaps I should go and get some of that moonshine from my Dad.
["I’ll take “Reason #2 why I’m glad to be back on SDMB, Alex”. Answer: Anything posted by Rue DeDay.]
screech-owl’s list:[ul]
[li]Solid stick deodorant burns when applied to soon-to-be-replaced dormitory carpeting **[/li][li]“Target-brand” version of Purell sanitizer is far inferior to “Purell” version of “Purell” sanitizer - nasty feeling and smell - ick.[/li][li]Peeps melt very well in fresh water, almost as well as they burn in fire. Imagine 30 or so Klingon/Trekkers (yours truly excluded - I was the token outsider) hurling several thousand Christmas/Easter/Halloween/generic Peeps at each other in a massive Peep fight while tubing down a nice, quiet, serene Florida freshwater spring/river (each of us was armed with several Zip-Loc baggies stuffed with various holiday incarnations of Peeps [note, the Christmas tree ones were kind of sharp around the edges], as well as each of us being armed with water guns, unlimited ammo, thanks to the river). Damn, those things hurt before they totally melt, not to mention the mess they make when semi-melted in your hair. Poor fish must have been on a sugar high for days. Thank goodness the water is purified before it is bottled. [/li][/ul]
** - Note: I was neither personally involved in either the creating of the deodorant line design or the application of lighted match to the same. I will admit to being one of several to vocalize the sentiment of “Holy #%^@! It DOES burn like a @&# of a #&@$!” (or words to that effect).
(As DogMom tries one last time to be one of the cool kids who can post in Rue’s threads without killing it)
Did you know that if you buy one of those large “wheels” of ONE THOUSAND FIRECRACKERS (hey, that’s the way it’s printed on the label), and unroll it and just light it at one end and let it burn all the way to the other end that it not only unrolls to approximately 20 feet long, but it also takes a really long time to finish cracking? Say, at least five minutes or so? (however, don’t bother putting tin can on one of the firecrackers to see if it’ll shoot the can up in the air. It doesn’t. The can just falls over.) And an M-80 shoots a can REALLY REALLY high into the air. Not that I’ve tried it or anything.
Oh, and putting baby powder in a balloon, then inflating it with butane, making a wick to it and lighting the wick so that it lights the balloon makes a REALLY COOL FIREBALL.
Or…um…so I’ve been told.
(And it’ll light your shower curtain on fire if you do it in the shower stall, so don’t do that.)
And if you impale a Peep on a toothpick through it’s small marshmallow-y head, then you can easily roast it over your lighter. Although I’ve noticed this tends to make people really upset.
I don’t think it’s the Peep roasting that upsets people Doggie. I think it’s more you laughing maniacally and saying “Talk! Tell me what I want to know, or it’s back to the flame with you!”. People don’t like to see Easter Treats tortured.
