I've got a secret.

I do. This is so secret I can never tell it. I have to go to my grave not telling. How AM I gonna do this?
I have to go to the dentist in January, what if I blab it under the gas?

No worries. You’ll have so much dental paraphernalia in your mouth, they won’t understand you anyway. :slight_smile:

You just tell the dentist you don’t want any gas.

Waitaminute, is that the secret? That you don’t want any gas?

I had secrets I didn’t blab even when my then-dentist administered gas. The current tooth-doc doesn’t; I must pre-load on Norco. If I was gassed enough to blather, I’d likely be unintelligible. So just slur a lot. Pretend it’s poetry.

Shhhh. Don’t tell anyone:

Racer X is really Speed’s brother Rex

Anything you say under gas comes with built-in plausible deniability. You can simply claim it was all Jibber-Jabber.

But really. Just admit that you ran over your kid’s cat all those years ago.

Don’t worry, you got away with it.

It must be one bad, bad, bad secret! :smiley:

You’re pregnant???

I am certain that secret might get noticed, after awhile.

Is the secret something dentist would be obligated to report to police?

If not, then just find a dentist who is also a Catholic priest — Make confession to him. Or, simpler, give the dentist a dollar extra as a lawyer’s retainer. Sure he’s not a member of the ABA, but — lawyers, help us here please — maybe a Doper can set up a little fake country and admit your dentist to its bar.

How painful are your teeth? Can you tolerate the pain for another year or two?

The secret isnt illegal activity or dangerous to any ones life. It just needs to be kept secret. I am getting my teeth cleaned and my extensive implants scaled and scrubbed. I will be gassed and valiumed up. Cannot do it, otherwise. Too chicken. I like the idea of paying the dentist, the hygenist, the insurance lady, the receptionist. My driver. Man this is gonna cost a small fortune.

Just tell me and then it won’t be a burden that worries you any longer. :smiley:

I have a better idea. Y’all tell me a secret each. They’ll all get jumbled up in my brain. When I am yammering no one will understand. And ‘my’ secret will get lost in the crowd.
Yep. That’s a dang good idea.
Don’t worry. Your secret will be safe with me.
Start postin’ them secrets. I’ll take notes.

I probably have some darker secrets than you, and I used to worry about spouting stuff out under anesthesia.

I’ve gone under General about 3 times and varying degrees of other anesthesia and laughing gas but I never said anything weird that I’m aware of, I did tell the dentist how laughing gas was awesome while I was on it, he seemed casually amused.

Ok I admit it, sometimes I cheat at board games.

:confused: I’m sorry.

Just close your eyes and think of corndogs.

When I did my Bronze swimming medal at age 12-or-so, I never did the full 22 lengths. I did 18 and lied.


(Missed the edit: Is the US word “laps” rather than “lengths”? Still. Pretty bad, huh?)