I've got hemorrhoids. What's going to happen to me?

The pain is not constant, but when I’m experiencing it, it can be really bad. My appointment is on Monday afternoon. What do you suppose they’re going to do to me?

They’re going to be a pain in the ass. :wink:

Seven, Mr. Rilch, Friend and I have already made all the jokes. :stuck_out_tongue: Also, the problem developed just a day or two before Dubya’s rectal probe, or whatever it was. I wonder if there will ever be another occasion when I feel an affinity with him?

Seriously, though. Will I get a prescription? Will they be surgically removed? Will I undergo some sort of in-office topical procedure?

I’m not worrying about it hurting. Anything’s bearable as long as I know it will get better. And I don’t get embarrassed around doctors and nurses, because I know they’ve seen everything. I’m just wondering what to expect, and how many visits it might take.

IANAD, but I’m willing to make some guesses. You probably won’t require surgery right now. The doc will probably recommend some diet and lifestyle changes. More fiber and exercise, less straining while trying to move your bowels, that sort of thing. And you will learn that sitz baths are your FRIENDS.

For relief right now, you can go buy a sitz bath in a drugstore and use it according to directions, or just sit in a bathtub with a couple of inches of the hottest water you can stand. I’ve tried hemorrhoid creams, and I’ve had better success just applying A&D ointment on the affected area, after cleansing it thoroughly. YMMV.

Cleanliness is NOT optional. You MUST clean the area, no matter how much it hurts. The wet wipes are invaluable.

A donut cushion can make sitting a much more pleasant experience.

Say hello to Proctofoam™.

BTW, psyllium husk fiber will probably be a good friend for you in the near future as well.

Sitz baths made my experience worse, I think from sitting in that position for that long. Many of the fiber powders, pills and husks made me more uh . . . stuck. I found that getting fiber from the diet (eat lots of fruits, vegetables and legumes) and drinking lots and lots of water worked well. Also take a stool softener (without laxative - it’s ducolate sulfide or something like that).

Even doing all the things the doc told me to do, I still ended up (ha!) having to have surgery. Let me tell you, you want to do anything before having surgery. I didn’t have a lot of choice: my husband said it looked like I had a squash hanging out down there, they were that bad. If they’re not too bad, they’ll do a “banding” where they band the little suckers, they atrophy and fall off. I didn’t have this, but it has got to be less painful than the cutting surgery I had.

I haven’t gone through childbirth, but I challenge anyone to come up with a more painful experience than recovering from this surgery.

Oh, another thing a friend told me her mother told her was to “poke them back up in there.” DO NOT DO THIS. And I can’t repeat enough what Lynn said, and this goes for everyone, DO NOT STRAIN on the pot and DO NOT sit there smoking/reading/whatever for any length of time. You will regret it!

It is now 3 years post-surgery and I have had just a little one come back but it’s nothing compared to what I had before. I had pain for about a year and a half after the surgery, but I was a special case. The doc said I was the second worst case he’d ever seen. I have the ugliest star you can imagine (no, don’t try); I guess I won’t be doing pornos anytime soon. And you can bet I have a great diet full of fiber and never let myself get dehydrated. I also still sit on a donut at work.

And another thing . . .

The first doc I went to, he asked did they bleed? I said yes. He proceeded to squeeze the suckers. I’m crying from the pain, what are you doing? He says he’s squeezing to see if he can get some blood to come out. What? Like he didn’t believe me. I think his squeezing helped make them as bad as they got. I found out afterward he specializes in surgery on infants, who can’t complain about the pain. Masochist. Don’t let the doctor squeeze you!

Well it may sound a bit extreme, but there is always this option

I’d recommend getting one of these – I have a very similar one and not only do you get squeaky clean, but it soothes burning a lot [for example, with diarrhea].

Same thing happened to an uncle of mine and 50 years later he died…

TMI (but everything on the subject is) Had 'em but no where near as bad as AlaItalia. My first Dr. visist ended: in eat better, don’t strain, try Citrucel. <Hand pat> Come back in 3 weeks if that doesn’t work.

That didn’t work & I came back. MUCH pissed about 3 more weeks of pain.

They rubber banded me. He explained that typically there are usually 3-4 seperate rubber banding sessions on 3-4 different areas & he does 'em one at a time.

It was uncomfortable getting banded but not painful. That night about 3 AM I awoke with pain, not searing, not agony, but pain enuff to wake me up. It had atrophied and fallen off. I took Tylenol and was able to sleep within 1/2 hour. Same drill 3 other times.

Dr. said if it didn’t work “heat” would be our next option. Didn’t ask/didn’t tell re “heat”. Banding worked : For 2 years and counting so far.

Only thing I’d do different would be to not be hand patted and sent off after the first visit. Was very Embarassed about the whole situation,I mean WTF? it was to the point I was even embarassed to push the Doc onn the subject, when I was where you are now.

Good luck.

I second Opal’s suggestion of a bidet.

I’ve got the same problem but it has seldom been troublesome since I got my bidet.

I liked 'em so much, I’m now a distributor. Mine hook up to any sink or water supply and you can adjust the temperature of the water.

It’ll cost you less than a doctors visit to see if they give you relief.

They might freeze 'em off. Or tie them off with tiny rubber bands to choke off the blood supply so they die. Seriously.

In the meantime, have you tried a donut pillow? I’m seated upon one right now. They should be at the local pharmacy.

Or they might give you suppositories that will heal them. (And you’ll say, “What? *Another * pain in the ass? That’s what I came here to get rid of!”)

Joking aside, I hope you will have great relief soon.


Fiber and water: Been doing that. Hasn’t been a cure, but I like to think it’s kept things from getting worse.

Less straining? My theory was that if I kept up with the fiber and water, I wouldn’t have to strain as much, but isn’t telling me not to strain somewhat like telling me to have a lighter menstrual period?

Been taking baths. Helps somewhat.

Creams? No. Went through half a tube of Prep. H with no results. Mr. Rilch recommended Desitin, which also did nothing. Stopped using anything topical because I didn’t want blockage on top of this.

I HAVE been cleaning the area, and it doesn’t hurt at all; it feels better! For a few minutes, anyway.

Donut cushion? I’m not there yet. But I have told Mr. Rilch I can’t ride in his truck until either this goes away or he gets his shock absorbers fixed. That’s the one action that makes me more miserable than any other.

Proctofoam? I’ll do anything if it’s prescribed. But I am going to tell the doc that other topical applications had a negative effect.

No squash. More like a cherry.

“Poke them back up in there?” Did this woman also tell your friend to put butter on a burn?

Bidanit? Sounds like a good thing even if I don’t have this conditon!

Banding? Suppositories? Again, I’ll submit to anything if it feels safe. I’ve been to this doc before, and it’s unlikely that she will brush me off or make me bleed.

I just hope that whatever is done to me will take effect quickly.

Thanks for all the advice!

Keep us updated! We vicarious sufferers want to know how it comes out (GROAN).

On the straining thing, just don’t (excessively; obviously, you’ve got to push a little). If nothing comes out, just stop and try again later. I know it’s uncomfortable to feel like there’s something in there and it’s got to come out, but believe the squash woman when she tells you you’re better off feeling a little, uh, full, than straining.

And I guess I don’t need to say this, but NO ANAL SEX! :eek:

Developed them at 26 (!). Didn’t have any insurance, lived with it, tried some herbal remedies (no avail) and found that a few lifestyle changes helped a bit and now they just act up in periods of great stress. They had been screamingly bad-- biting your hand while in the can, putting off that event as long as possible, etc. Things that helped: Mellow out. Drink a lot of coffee in the morning and stay very regular. Very Regular! Something fibrous in your diet-- if you don’t eat breakfast cereal this might not be a bad time to start. Did I mention staying regular? If you gotta go, go, even if you’re at work or somewhere else unpleasant. You want things to stay nice and in motion and of a pleasant consistency (eewww). Remember, the longer that stuff stays in your colon the more moisture is extracted from it, leaving it brick-like, and it winds up a vicious cycle as you avoid the inevitable. I think bad periods come and go, like herpes or something.
Did I mention coffee? Coffee in the morning, go before you leave for work.

I agree with capybara! I had that in mind all along, that I don’t want my colon to be clogged.

:::Where’s that box of ColonBlow?:::

Get some lubricated toilet tissue, or even Tucks [sup]tm[/sup] and blot, don’t wipe! Gentle rinsings with a hand-held shower head. And get thee to a competent doctor to see how bad the problem is. Remember, not everything that bleeds and is a pain in the anus is a hemorrhoid. You could have a fissure, or a fistula. And if it is a hemorrhoid it may just be dilated and leaking, or could be thrombosed (filled with a blood clot). The latter hurt a lot for days before getting better.

And fiber is good! Ideally you should thus form large, bulky bowel movements that take about 45 seconds to unload, with minimum muss and fuss. But the transition from your former stooling pattern to your new high-fiber one can be uncomfortable.

OK - do I have them or not? A couple of years ago I went to the doctor with rectal bleeding - bright red blood in the toilet, not always poop related. I then endured that procedure that shall not be named. A doc stuck a good 45 feet of tubing up there with a camera to check out my colon (no drugs, mind you) and found nothing to be alarmed about. He said “You probably have hemorrhoids. You also have a spastic colon.” So now I sometimes bleed during, umm, private bathroom moments; sometimes it feels like I ate razor blades for dinner because it feels like ripping - Alien style - from the pooper. Is that what it feels like for you guys?

Sounds like my experiences, but like the good doc said, you should get it looked at. Try the bidet. If you have enough water pressure the handheld ones work as an enema as well!