I can’t remember weather it was Ginger or I who first started doing this, but one of us sang “Jarbaby” to the tune of this song, and now whenever it comes on we both laugh and sing the “Jarbabyj mix” version of the song “Hey baby” by No Doubt. The trouble is that it gets stuck in your head, and after singing “jarbaby, jarbaby jay” under my breath all night, I decided to just write the damn thing, so with apologies to No Doubt, I give you “Hey Baby (jarbabyj mix)”:
There’s a certain girl known to dopers of the world,
hold her banner high let it never be furled,
posting when she’s on, she’s a paragon,
writing steamy stories for us to dream upon.
In the pit, hot shit
cuting barbs, wicked
everybody else in awe of the girl
with the brand new curse words.
Trolls are skating on thin ice,
taking her on in the face of all advice,
ragging on her faith or dissin on the Bears,
She’ll kick their ass-es
All the dopes say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
socks try, run away.
Jar baby, jar baby jay
Jar baby jay
Jar baby, jar baby jay
we say, we say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
if you’re a jerk you get no slack, slack, slack
She’s the one, we focus on
top notch doper, number one.
she’ll tell you why Favre won’t make that pass,
crush the Viking fans for giving her sass
Laughing at the Lions, always the same
everybody knows it’s her claim to fame
knows more about football than the boys
and the boys really like it
Cheeseheads say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
with dismay, dismay
Jar baby, jar baby jay
Jar baby jay
Jar baby, jar baby jay
we say, we say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
if you’re a jerk you get no slack
Look at that! It’s jarbaby, no doubt!
At the message boards, they’re going crazy
see the lady strut, there ain’t no maybe
Everybody knows she’s the real Slim Shady
Jarbaby, hey jarbaby!
At the message boards, they’re going crazy
see the lady strut, there ain’t no maybe
Everybody knows she’s the real Slim Shady
Jarbaby, hey jarbaby!
With the sexy stories she’s just not lazy
make men get hard an women go crazy
spice it with some chains and a whip just maybe
it’s no maybe, Jar baby!
Trolls are skating on thin ice,
taking her on in the face of all advice,
ragging on her faith or dissin on the Bears,
She’ll kick their ass-es
All the dopes say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
socks try, run away.
Jar baby, jar baby jay
Jar baby jay
Jar baby, jar baby jay
we say, we say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
She’s the one and only doper lady
Jar baby, jar baby jay
we say, we say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
At the message boards, they’re going crazy
Jar baby, jar baby jay
we say, we say
Jar baby, jar baby jay
if you’re a jerk you get no slack