My mother always thought this one was a real knee-slapper:
Do you know Billy Bones?
Who?
Billy Bones!
Billy Bones?
Who?
Billy Bones!
Never heard of him.
AHHHHH WHAT DOES ALL THIS MEAN!? 
hehe
Jenny*
**
She offered her honor
He honored her offer.
And that’s how it went all night.
Honor and offer.
Honor and offer.
Honor and offer.
**
MR puppies
MR not
OSAR
MR not puppies
OSAR–CMPN?
O, MR puppies!
MR DUCKS
MR NOT
OSAR CM WINGS
LIB MR DUCKS
Allow me to translate:
You figure out the rest on your own.
The coolest Goblin King yet.
An old joke in this vein went something like (loosely paraphrased)
Why are fire engines red?
Roses are red too.
Two and Two is four.
Four and eight is twelve.
There are twelve inches in a ruler.
Queen Mary was a ruler.
Queen mary was also a ship.
Ships sail in the sea.
< This part is vague…I’m getting senile >
See the newspaper?
Newspapers are read.
Russians are red too,
and everyone know’s fire engines are always rushin’.
And that’s why fire engines are red.
FUNEX?
S, EFX.
FUNEM?
S, EFM.
IFMNX.
OK.
You are a man after my own heart, Jack. Thank you thank you thank you! Does this mean I’m not the only spaz who knows this movie by heart?
Your are a man after my own heart, Jack. Thank you thank you thank you! Does this mean I’m not the only spaz who knows this movie by heart?
Shit. Damn double post.
Dr. Demento used to play a version of this by a comedy troupe whose name escapes me (I want to say “The Residents,” but isn’t that the group with the eyeball heads??? Perhaps it was “The Occupants?”) The only thing I can remember was it featured Michael McKean (Spinal Tap, Laverne and Shirley.)
Not by a long-shot, my young “spastic” friend 
. In fact I feel secure in saying there is a veritable contingent of Real Genius devotees wanderin’ around these here boards.
Oh my god. Until this moment I believed myself alone in the universe. I’m not kidding. Not only do I feel warm, I also feel fuzzy. I am a very happy girl.
A girl–a warm- and fuzzy-feeling girl, at that–who loves “Real Genius”?!
<Balance falls in love.>
Dr. Demento used to play a version of this by a comedy troupe whose name escapes me (I want to say “The Residents,” but isn’t that the group with the eyeball heads??? Perhaps it was “The Occupants?”) The only thing I can remember was it featured Michael McKean (Spinal Tap, Laverne and Shirley.) **
[/QUOTE]
Perhaps the Frantics? Of “Tae Kwon Leap/Boot to the Head” fame?
Hey Balance, why is that toy on your head?
Well, shoot, I got here too late. I can quote the entire movie; it’s one of my favorites.
Hands off Jean, he’s mine. (I hear he can hammer a six inch spike through a board with his penis. I’m not giving this guy up!)