That’s the BEST mini-rant I think I’ve ever read. They should just close this thread now, and let’s everybody chill until July 1.
Heh! Thanks. 
The thing is, Buddy would look so cool with it on. I guess I’m lucky he’ll wear a collar and tags. Maybe I could get some charms for the collar. Or maybe get a red rhinestone collar.
Pay attention to meeeeeeeeeee!!! I am awesome, someone’s gotta want to pay attention! I’m so tired of being blown off and ignored.
I don’t know who to rant at - myself or others. I do a lot of self-beating-up. So maybe this one is for the others.
Okay! I’m payin’ attention! What do you want to say?
If I lived in the same town as you I would totally come over to your house and make you some drinks and then we could play Clue or something. Seriously, I do stuff like that sometimes because life is short and within reason it can be cool to be random. (Plus I don’t think you’re like a psychopath or anything. :p)
But I am paying attention!!! 
And I’ve had the runs for three days. Gone through a ridicuolous amount of tp and done so much wiping my ass is likely as red as a baboon’s.
And thus the balance of the universe is maintained.
I did that once! I’d been given a teddy bear with a little red velveteen bow on an covered elastic loop. My cat condescended to wear it long enough for me to take one picture before vanishing under the couch.
Never saw the tie again.
Man, I feel for you. I have IBS and it’s seriously either feast or famine as far as that is concerned. And as far as your cat actually wearing a bowtie, I am so jealous that you actually go the feline to wear it. I bet he was totally cute!!
You rock!
I’m just crabby because I’m at a point in my life where all of my friends are married and/or have kids, now my brother and his wife are about to have a kid, and no one has any fucking time for me. Or if they do, all talk is about them. I’ve got a boyfriend but he doesn’t seem to have time for me either. One of my few single friends blew me off three times this week, and one of the others apparently got a girlfriend and he hasn’t spoken to me in month.
So like, WTF, world? Having all of one’s shit together is a totally boring existence. I spent the last 10 years working my ass off to get to where I am - strong, independent and financially stable - and now it seems I totally missed the memo that I should have spent that time becoming married.
This is why I spend waaaay too much time on the Dope!
Oh shoot, I think I know what you are talking about.
All of my friends are married and have kids or are in serious relationships. Even my parents are (for once!!) totally involved with each other, which in one way is good, but in another way it sucks because as you say, who will notice ME??
I also have a 44-year-old sister who is beautiful and fabulous and thinks she is SO cool and better than me and is married and has a husband and big social life and NO time for me. Yes, it does get kind of lonely sometimes. But on the other hand, I honestly would not want to be married or in a relationship because it just would not fit in with my life right now. But like you I spend a LOT of time by myself. And sometimes it’s just kind of melancholy, baby.
I don’t know what the answer is. I just think that for now us crabby (my favorite word by the way and it so cracked me up that you used it!!) dames need to stick together!! 
No, you do not have a theory. What you have is a hypothesis, and one that a third grader with a decent science book, a rubber band, and two thumb tacks could disprove within a minute.
And that goes for “it’s just a theory”, too.
Shut your goddamn child up, you ignorant twat. You and your wild animal and in a motherfucking library.
F-ck hangovers.
moans
shuffles back to the bed to bury his head in pillows
Because I was annoyed by this at Moe’s last night (Welcome to Moes!)
Ma’am, your 12 year old son not only can but should be expected to interact with the people who are attempting to serve him. And he should be expected to stop texting on his cell phone while he does so. Instead we have this:
The counterperson asks the kid, What can I get you? The kid doesn’t look up or acknowledge her existence, keeps texting. His mother leans into him and says “Sweetie, what do you want?” The kid mumbles something. His mother tells the counterperson, “He’ll have a burrito.” (In a burrito shop! Quelle suprise!) The counterperson asks the kid, still clearly trying to establish one-to-one contact, “Do you want chicken, steak, tofu, or pork?” The kid doesn’t look up or acknowledge her existence, keeps texting. His mother leans into him and says “Sweetie, do you want chicken, steak, tofu, or pork?” The kid mumbles. His mother tells the counterperson, “He’ll have chicken.”
Repeat, ad nauseam, throughout all of the available toppings and condiments available on the long and well-stocked burrito bar. By the end, it took three times as long to make the Prince’s burrito because all inquiries had to go through his mummy, and I was convinced the kid was a first-class asshole and his mother was a twit. After she rang them up and they turned away, the counterperson and I exchanged significant looks confirming that we were in agreement on this.
I still love Moe’s though.
Creaky and ZipperJJ - may I join your club?
Every year a group of us go to a music festival. Three couples… and me.
A friend invites me over for dinner. Two couples… and me.
A coworker invites many people to her bridal shower. Except for those of us at a ‘certain’ age who never married. Heard from an invited co-worker that (X) felt bad for us, and thought we may have problems with her happiness. Bitch.
My sister and I had a standing date for every other Saturday - dinner and shopping. That ended when she and the (now) b-i-l hooked up. No problem, I understand. She says “Call me, we’ll go bumming around”, yet every single time I call, she’s busy. “(b-i-l) needs dinner” - the man can’t cook for himself? “(b-i-l) is working on the yard” - are you helping? supervising?
I gave up calling. Now she nags about how we don’t hang out. Uh, dur?
I do work from home most of the time, but every now and then I have a task that requires me to be at the main office - that was the case on Tuesday.
And yeah, I meant that she should wash her hands after rubbing her eyes. Missed a couple of words!
I tried to drop off a prescription today, only to find out that my health insurance card does not cover prescriptions. I’m supposed to have a second card for that. That I never received, apparently.
I go online to order a new owe.
I can’t order a new card without my user number… which can only be found on the card.
I call the toll free customer service number… but I can only be helped if I have my user number… which can only be found on the card. Which I never received.
My employer’s website doesn’t have any information anywhere, not even the number or email of a person I can contact to seek help. The only information online about prescription drug cards is a link to the website I already visited and the phone number I already called.
When did I walk into Brazil?
So, I am needing a part for my car (blower motor housing filter), and I check local dealerships because all the sources I’ve checked state that I need a particular model number, made by the auto manufacturer.
I check Google and I find a few authorized dealerships that may sell the part. I check the first site and their Parts Dept. has all their wares easily displayed. The price is decent, but I decide to comparison shop. Unfortunately, I’m only able to find one other that is within 40 miles of me. I check the Parts page on their website, but they don’t have an inventory for display. Instead, I have to fill out a form requiring information such as my phone number, mailing address, and full name, and then someone will contact me. The irony is, while those fields are mandatory, the fields for model number, or the name of the part are both optional. I am about to give up, when I see they have another option - to chat live with a representative of the dealership. So, I click it, pleased at the thought of being able to subvert their data-mining.
After waiting ten minutes for a representative to “connect”, I get this:
Representative: “Hello, how can we help you?”
Me: “I was just wondering if you could tell me if you had name of part and model number in stock, and if so, how much it would cost.”
Representative: “If you just give us your name, phone number and address, we can have someone contact you.”
Me: “No thanks. If I wanted to do that, I could have just filled out the form.”
*** REPRESENTATIVE HAS DISCONNECTED ***
What the hell?
Stupid fucks that keeps feeding the real life trolls irritate me more than the trolls.
sigh
Of course you can!! No membership dues either. 
Yeah, it’s a bummer, and the thing is, you are most likely made to feel guilty (obviously or tacitly) for being angry about being ignored. Like you are being selfish or something. And this is most likely said by people who are totally self-centered in the first place. As my cat would say: FFFFTTTTT!!! :mad:
Well, sister, we won’t ignore you HERE!!
I feel a need to comment on this. Up until about maybe about 5 years or so ago, it seemed like interviewers asked intelligent, probing, relevant questions. Interviews were tough. People asked me all kinds of questions about the projects I worked on and what I did and why I left. Now they seem to be run by idiot half-wits with the mind of a child. Your basic interview guide book prepares you for questions like “what are your strengths and weaknesses?” or “what were some of the greatest challenges you faced?”. It doesn’t prepare you for some retard stammering out “uh…so…um…do you have any questions about the job? as his opener” Yes, I have a question. What the fuck is this job? Don’t tell me you are hiring at “all levels”. Which level are you considering me for? How do you plan to evaluate me? By how tall I am? Are you expecting me to pontificate for 30 minutes about how awesome I am hoping I will come accross as competant but not arrogant? Do you even know what you are looking for in a candidate? Did someone just tap you on the shoulder and tell you to go interview me?
See the next question for you to ask them is this:
“Is there any way I can get the price and availability without giving out my contact information?”
If the answer to that is “no,” your next decision is whether this is a deal-breaker for you.
A thought: What happens if you put bogus contact information into the online form?